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The Coms:  None necessary.  Went to the drop in on a Friday morning at 9AM.  Only 30 min wait.

The venue: The Gum clinic is a separate building so no wandering through the hospital.  I looked on a map so I didn't have to ask anyone.  (Entrance 2 off Hucknall Rd).  Parking was full, so had to go to main carpark and walk back.  Cost £4. Inside clean and tidy - no fishy smell.

The event: Reception was business like.  Said was there for STI test.  Neutrally hands me clipboard to fill out.  The only form I have filled out that asks gender and gender at birth! I have been told that you can make up name and birthdate, but if you do, make sure you remember it.  I just told the truth as I am crap at remembering lies.

Male only waiting room.  Got called after 30 min.  Doctor was 50 year old, no visible tats, not sure if boobs real or fake.  Asked my sexual history and had no surprise as I reeled off my adventures.  She seemed pleased that I always use condoms.  She may not have been impressed with my Thailand adventures in the past, but she was hard to read. Advised full check up. Was having a special on Hep B vaccine so went for this extra (only 0£ more).

Changed rooms and the non cute nurse got me to pee in a jar, and took some blood.  Waited 10 min for the jab.  Gave me a number to call for results (optional - if anything is bad they call in 2 weeks).  Got timing for next jab. No kiss goodbye.

Got a text to call them 5 weeks later.  Had 4 hours of deep fear.  It was just I forgot to go for my 2nd jab.  Am all clear and they confirmed that they would have called 3 weeks earlier had there been a problem.  Whew.  Next time I will call them, why not?

Scores at the doors: 9/10 .  Just loses a point for the crap parking.

If any of this sounds new to you, please stop fucking all the prossie's that I am.  I know you use a condom like me, but still. Get yourself down to a Gum clinic.  Is free and confidential.

I think the doctor at my clinic is into bdsm as I got a swab stuck down my bell end! 

I choose to tell the full truth.  Thought it would result in the best treatment.

SD - like the style of the review.  But you did miss out as to whether you'd do a repeat visit !
Without wanting to sound thick then i'm trying to figure out why i might need to go for a check-up
Obviously nodders for sex.  But no OWO.  And no RO.  I do like kissing on the odd occasion - if they're well fit & they seem up for it.  More when initiated by the WG.  They just can't resist.  Or maybe they just want me to come quicker 
Mostly i just do B2B massage & HJ's - but hard to resist when they say "are you sure you don't want to fuck me ?"
So should i be off to the GUM and do HepB and whatever else ?  Is there a doctor here on UKP ?

Think you're more likely to catch stuff shagging civvies.  Doesn't take long for condoms to be dispensed with - 2nd or 3rd 'date'.  I don't know how many civvies i've shagged over the years who insist on condoms for sex for the 1st time - but still like little WP slipped in just a little bit at the start.  More the case is that they say "FFS don't come inside me".  Everything else is fine     Will do a GUM trip based on your advice - have been pondering for a while. 

Best place is Dean St Express, Soho.  Test done in 30 mins, they text you the results in 24 hours - very comprehensive, smart place, total anonymity , well placed for celebration shag - if appropriate . . . . .