There are different links and numbers for this massage parlour. The one below from gumtree is the one I used.
External Link/Members OnlyArranged by text. The address was provided during texting.
The location is not discrete in any way at all. Very busy street. To make matters worse, there was a builders van parked right outside, and yes, you guessed it, they were on a break (I'm sure they were working hard), so I had about 5 pairs of eyes on me as I entered. You have to ring the door bell and wait to be let in. I knew what was coming next... more later...
I was going for a massage only. £30 for 30 mins. £50 for 60 mins. I booked an hour. On this occasion I was not interested in HE.
I'm not sure what to tell those punters who want to know what to say, what signals to give, secret messages to leave, how to find out whats on offer, etc etc...
I went in. Sat in the waiting room. Was called up by an attractive 30 something oriental female, I can't remember her name, but we will call her Amy because thats what the ad says.
You take your shoes off at the bottom of the stairs. My shoes are always the smallest compared to others.
Downstairs wasn't the nicest but the room upstairs was dead on. Warm, relaxing, clean.
I stripped off, face down.
The girl came in. Nice satin sarong. Strong fit lady. Very nice. Chatting. Good english.
She immediately offered extras. No secret signals required. HE +£20. B2B +£50. I declined. She was like - are you sure?
She then gave a good strong massage. She climbed up on top. Rubbing herself on my back and legs and offered extras again. I declined.
She flipped me over and started my hand grinding on her thighs and between her legs and offered extras again. I declined.
I really enjoyed myself as I was not in the slightest interested in extras but if you never have any luck getting extras then this is the place to go!
We finished up and she offered more - I apologised and again said no thanks - she says - hot stones? So I was like - go for it.
Finished up with hot stone treatment. To be fair she really put the work in on me, hence the positive review.
To finish the story (I told you there was more), I went back down, found the smallest gutties, and said thanks to the staff in the waiting area.
As I stuck my head in... you guessed it... the workmen from the van all sitting waiting!
Would I go back for an hour massage, probably not. But it's a dead cert for a 30 min visit for some extra fun next time I'm in Lurgan. Knowing my luck, I'll get offered FA next time.
