I had to go to Farnborough - FYI a dump - so I read a few reviews on here and took the plunge. Simples.
I texted prior to book a timed slot, although when I arrived, I’m not convinced anyone knew I was coming.
I was met on entry by Lele – a buxom, super friendly, bright eyed Chinese lady. She remained fully masked throughout – she could be 40, she could be pushing 50, I really have no idea.
My tactic is not to fuck about in these places, despite the fierce sign on the wall saying ‘No Sexual Services’, so I just said at the start that I wanted a serious back massage and then a ‘naughty’ ending. Lele giggled – “you naughty man” – and we were off.
She massaged the shit out of my back, then delivered a perfectly serviceable ‘tug’ – not massively erotic, which would be my only negative comment. I paid £45 for the rub and £20 for the tug – bargain. In and out inside 55 minutes. Thoroughly recommended.
Lele’s English is limited but fit for purpose. I asked after the rub and before the tug if she offered B2B. She said ‘yes’ and referenced her ‘big boobs and big nipples’. She radiates a saucy, cheeky quality - so I will probably give this a go next time.
She told me two girls work here. I heard another male voice at one point – I assume another punter.
My phone kept pinging – I joked that my wife was trying to track me down. This made me realise that in many respects Lele would make the perfect wife for me, in that she….
• is about 15 years younger than me
• is happy to massage me/toss me off
• tells me I have a ‘strong body’ and that I am a ‘young man’ (I’m not, FYI)
• has big knockers
• doesn’t talk much
Ah, lol.
And is it just me who thinks it is delightful that pretty much every high street in the UK has a Thai/Chinese massage place like this, with a legit frontage, but with a jolly Chinese lady inside, happily wanking off blokes left, right and centre? I bloody love this country.
