External Link/Members OnlyBookingStraightforward booking through Pasha – meeting was Friday afternoon last week. I always like to wait a few days before submitting a review.
Fee£300 for one hour. I wouldn't normally spend this on a brass, but I have a couple of side-hustles as well as my normal job and was well over-target for the month, so it was money I could afford to take a punt with, so to speak.
Location[/b]
Lower ground floor flat about 2 minutes walk from Earls Court. Fairly discreet but she's renting it by the room, rather than the flat itself – there were other SP's in the flat milling about.
The girlThis is where the problems started – I'd made sure to arrive at the flat slightly and waited on the pavement a few doors down, not wishing to loiter outside. I saw a woman coming up behind me and thought it might be her and lo and behold it was, as she introduced herself – dressed in leggings, trainers and a black sleeveless bodywarmer type thing. Also, some way shorter than the profile would suggest. She resembled a haggard mum waiting at the school gates. This almost killed any positive anticipation I had.
I'd wanted to see her for a number of years but it'd always struck me as odd I couldn't find any detailed reviews – only later do I find out why.
Photos are heavily (like, really heavily) photoshopped. This wasn't entirely unexpected but the extent to which they've been edited borders on taking the piss. Penny accent's was a massive let down – I'd naively assumed from her profile and the fact that she's registered with a number of high-end agencies that she'd be bordering on posh, she has the look in the photos of a horsey ex-public schoolgirl type – nothing could be further from the truth – Dartford/Basildon/Croydon, take your pick, but she certainly ain't posh.
The meetingI followed her down the steps and was led to the bedroom she was using – handed over the cash and was asked to take a shower. She went to get changed while I showered.
As a rule, the phrase "you get what you pay for" applies to many things in life – hotels, cars, education, plastic surgery, restaurants, jewellery – the list goes on. But every rule has it's exception, and in this case it's escorts – having been doing this (on and off) for 18 years one thing I've learnt is that there's no direct correlation at all between price paid and quality of service received.
Started off with a massage, which seemed to go for a disproportionate time. During this she asked me several questions regarding what I did for work etc, which agencies I used – I couldn't see how this was relevant and to be honest was quite off-putting. She starting stroking my cock which was ok, but I was itching for her to stop farting about and get down to some proper action. I asked her if she did French kissing, and she said no. This wasn't what was confirmed with the agency and it says she does in her profile. Laid on my back and she applied some lubricant then got on top – asked me to put my hand behind my head – clearly she didn't want me touching her. She was actually pretty loose and I didn't feel any friction at all, asked her if she did doggy style to which she refused – the first-time in 18 years I've been refused this.
By this time I'm thinking the experience is poor, bordering on a bit weird. She seemed totally disengaged. She got off me and started giving me hand relief until I came, to be honest this was fairly good. But for the price she's charging well under par. She cleaned me up then walked out the room and disappeared for about 5 minutes. I got dressed and left shortly after. The atmosphere was about as warm as a mortuary.
ProsFairly good at hand relief
Ok-ish massage
Flat was clean
ConsNowhere near as attractive as the photos would suggest
The session was basically a massage with a handjob attached
At the price she's charging, I'd expect her to have her own flat, not a shared pad with other SP's.
Services not delivered as per the profile and confirmation with the agency
In summary, she's just not very good at her job
Would I return?Would I fuck.
