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Author Topic: Penis care and review question  (Read 6150 times)

Offline yorkshire123

Marmalade, I have read your posts and you are one of the reasons I post.
I'm just sharing cos you guys share with me on the forums.
I'm not lying sir. Honestly

Gillis, its been fun but now its time to take Marmalade's advise & fuck off & get some help.

FFS when the careers officer asks you what you want to do when you leave school, don't tell them erotic writing because you really are crap at it.

Off to bed with you, you don't want to be late for your job in the morning & i believe those Sunday papers can be quite heavy so you will need all the strength you can muster.
Banning reason: Making false malicious allegations against admin

Offline gillis01

Bottom line, I am a nice guy, and I hoped that in this forum I would find similar. And I have, some of you guys are cool. But some of you have your own agendas.
I like this forum and will continue to be a part of it.
I shared an experience with with you all. Be respectfull of that.
We all have our own experiences 

Offline gillis01

Gillis, its been fun but now its time to take Marmalade's advise & fuck off & get some help.

FFS when the careers officer asks you what you want to do when you leave school, don't tell them erotic writing because you really are crap at it.

Off to bed with you, you don't want to be late for your job in the morning & i believe those Sunday papers can be quite heavy so you will need all the strength you can muster.

I like your posts. Why you giving me a hard time?

Offline vorian

Bottom line, I am a nice guy, and I hoped that in this forum I would find similar. And I have, some of you guys are cool. But some of you have your own agendas.
I like this forum and will continue to be a part of it.
I shared an experience with with you all. Be respectfull of that.
We all have our own experiences

OK may I ask how long you read this forum before joining as a member a couple of weeks ago.
Banning reason: Two faced - Slagging off UKP and it's membership using fake account

Offline yorkshire123

I like your posts. Why you giving me a hard time?

Hard time, I'm a mere amateur, wait until the day shift clocks on  :scare:
Banning reason: Making false malicious allegations against admin

Offline gillis01

OK may I ask how long you read this forum before joining as a member a couple of weeks ago.

Not long.
Am I doing something wrong? it seems that because I have had a sex life before this seems to be annoying people!?

Offline wristjob

Bottom line, I am a nice guy, and I hoped that in this forum I would find similar. And I have, some of you guys are cool. But some of you have your own agendas.
I like this forum and will continue to be a part of it.
I shared an experience with with you all. Be respectfull of that.
We all have our own experiences

Oh god, the A word. I have an agenda - to stop paying money to birds who give me a crap shag.

This forum is very much focussed around punting. You can ask brutally blunt questions but if you aren't actually a punter you really won't find a home here - no matter how nice you are.

Offline gillis01

Oh god, the A word. I have an agenda - to stop paying money to birds who give me a crap shag.

This forum is very much focussed around punting. You can ask brutally blunt questions but if you aren't actually a punter you really won't find a home here - no matter how nice you are.

Your response to the 27 year old guy who posted earlier about not wanting to punt anymore was exactly what I was gonna post. So you are the same as me sir. It's late so I am gonna play some music on y t. PM me bro

Why is forum being flooded with these sock puppet's and bullshitters?  :unknown: 

Why is forum being flooded with these sock puppet's and bullshitters?  :unknown:

Bangers I have no idea.

Unlike the OP I am not a nice guy I am a total cunt. So I find his home spun comedy postings a load of drivel.

If your going to be a comedy or a wind up poster at least be interesting.

OP! One minute your talking like a dyslexic Arab with a toffee up his arse and next minute your calling people bro! WTF? Take your head for a shit and use some olive oil to clean the skids off the pan, but most importantly! Fuck off! :bomb:

Bottom line, I am a nice guy, and I hoped that in this forum I would find similar. And I have, some of you guys are cool. But some of you have your own agendas.
I like this forum and will continue to be a part of it.
I shared an experience with with you all. Be respectfull of that.
We all have our own experiences

Look, you've had your little foray on the big bad punters forum but now it is clearly time for you to fuck off back to SAAFE.
« Last Edit: June 08, 2014, 07:56:51 AM by SeekingtheTruth »

Offline Sedlmayer

OP -what percentage body fat do you have?

I would suggest 2% body fat 98% bullshit!


avoiding getting into the controversial aspects of this thread I should like to suggest a great lubricant which has a product for with condom and a different product for without condom, called YES made by a company called Luberation. I have mentioned it before probably in reviews. I am not sales rep! I am just a punter who likes things to go smoothly and hates bad chemicals.

http://www.yesyesyes.org/luberation.htm

I am SO annoyed! :mad:

Why on earth did I choose to watch England 0, Honduras 0 late [by my standards] last night when I could actually have joined in this game instead? :mad: :angry:

Offline JV547845

So OP is asking for knob cleaning tips but have done anal bareback?  You've never heard the urban legends about finding shit covered sweetcorn kernels under your foreskin then?  I think I first read about that in Fiesta.  Your cock's gonna need a good clean after that.

Offline Quatro

The OP is clearly an olive oil salesman touting his product.

That's against the rules.  :hi:

Offline Marmalade

Still fucking here as well! Can someone send Nik a nice bunch of flowers? (Or email him to say you've bought his book - he sounds pissed off.)

Offline yorkshire123

Hard time, I'm a mere amateur, wait until the day shift clocks on :scare:

OP, i did try to warn you  :hi:
Banning reason: Making false malicious allegations against admin

Offline Marmalade

There must be a forum where young men can chat about their sexual experiences, true or not. UKPunting is a bit too specific for some people. I guess the clue is on the name. People who punt. Not people who think about, fantasise about it, phone up prossies and change their mind. That's for Daily Mail reporters . . .   :dash:

Roland D Hay

I care for my penis by not going anywhere without one of these so it's always snug and warm.




Offline CoolTiger

Olive oil, gives a new meaning to tossing the salad  :lol:

Don't forget, you'd have to use "Extra Virgin Oil" for that.  :lol:

Offline wristjob

Am I doing something wrong? it seems that because I have had a sex life before this seems to be annoying people!?

What annoys people is there isn't a "this".

If I want to rub olive oil on my cock or boast about analising random hippy birds I can do that down the pub or probably on most forums. If I'm 68, 40 stone, have grey pubes and shriveled dick and can hardly get it up and want to know if a 20yo size 6 babe will refuse to suck me off, should I stick to fat old mingers, this is the place to ask - without people laughing too much. It's great to have that freedom and generally we don't want it polluted by wannabes and irrelevant crap..

Now you are welcome to join us. It's £60 membership - go pay your local UKP "subscription collector" whose number can be found on AW. Go pay her today and you can call everyone bro.


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