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Author Topic: Loss of sex drive and happy  (Read 1240 times)

Offline Metalgear2018

Let me start this off. I'm in my early 30s, I exercise 3 times a week, don't smoke or drink. I have a secure career. I'm happy in myself. No depression or mental illness.

Recently, i have lost my sex drive. I have available female options to me and when I do have sex with them I'm not turned on. I have to use a blue pill (viagra) to have sex. Once I cum once. I think to myself this was a waste of my time. I don't mind female company and kissing but sex is just annoying.

I have had sex with lots of women, different locations, sexual positions, toys, etc etc. I'm just bored with sex. If I get hard its usually in the morning I just have a wank. Its better then stress and drama of having physical sex.

If I don't have sex for the next 10 years I don't care.

Offline garfield

You might want to mention that to a doctor, also bit of an odd place to be posting this

Offline Newnottsguy

That’s a loss of libido, I wish I was in that position, constantly thinking about sex and searching in AW and VS and in this forum is painstaking, a headache. If you completely take sex out the picture you could focus on other happier things in life! I don’t think it’s too bad! It’s probably why you’re mentally stable!

Offline Newnottsguy

Mentally stable in the sense that stable in not thinking of sex all the time! If that is the case

Offline Billy no mates

If I don't have sex for the next 10 years I don't care.

I wouldn’t jump to conclusions, you can’t be sure how you will feel in the future.

I’m mid 50’s and have had periods of lower and higher sex drive.

If you’re happy with your lifestyle then be happy, no need to analyse, maybe your desire will come back, maybe not, do what makes you happy.



Offline Metalgear2018

I wouldn’t jump to conclusions, you can’t be sure how you will feel in the future.

I’m mid 50’s and have had periods of lower and higher sex drive.

If you’re happy with your lifestyle then be happy, no need to analyse, maybe your desire will come back, maybe not, do what makes you happy.

Don't you get to a point where you would rather just watch TV and have a takeaway instead of having a woman pestering you.

Offline Newnottsguy

I did some research and most of your experiences are negative, perhaps that’s what had led you to conclude that fuck it all your happy.

Offline garfield

I don't need to mention this to a doctor when I'm happy with myself

Was thinking incase it was something more serious.

Offline cotton

Like people say listen to your body , same goes for listening to yourself psycologically , if what you feel like is just watching tv and having a takeaway do that. And i suspect in time you will recover your passion for women , everyones interest goes thru highs and lows as Billy no mates said  :thumbsup:

Offline Strawberry

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Have you lost any weight or reduced food intake (cals or carbs)?

Offline Chorley

Isn't this just natural?  :unknown: Libido ebbs and flows and I do believe the proliferation of online porn has skewed the mindset of many men who now believe that if they're not perpetually horny and shagging every 5 minutes they're a bit odd.  I'm pretty sure the pandemic has had an impact on this as well :hi:

Offline Thephoenix

I think we all go through different stages of our lives.

If you're happy, that's great.
So maybe no need to overthink it, or listen to others.

Like everything in life, you can have too much of a good thing and the novelty can wear off, but after a break you may find your libido returns

Just to add another thought, by asking are you still attracted to women?
Have you considered you may be bisexual or gay....no offence!
If so, maybe there's more excitement to be found there. :unknown:


Offline Metalgear2018

Have you lost any weight or reduced food intake (cals or carbs)?

No. I exercise regularly so I maintain a healthy weight. I eat lots of chicken and rice and junk food like chocolate, biscuits and crips

Offline Jonestown

Let me start this off. I'm in my early 30s, ..............................I have to use a blue pill (viagra) to have sex.

Might be worth your while looking into why at your age you need a blue pill, might be something more than indifference to sex going on.

Offline JontyR

No depression or mental illness.

Don't mean to be rude, but how do you know this? This would suggest you have been for a diagnosis. Depression isn't all about moping about.

Quote
I have to use a blue pill (viagra) to have sex.

A blue pill doesn't give you libido, it only works when there is arousal or stimulus. The blue pill is for when you are aroused but there isn't the physical manifestation of arousal. This would suggest to me that the effect actually is psychological rather than physical.

If you are happy with your lot, then don't go and see anyone. I would suggest that there is the potential for seeing a doctor for 10 minutes and vastly increasing your quality of life for 50 years. Not just on sex but on the outlook and enjoyment of life as  whole.

Or you may just be in a rut and in need of a proper holiday. 

Offline Billy no mates

I think about my first trip to Amsterdam, or when my wife discovered women.

When I first went for like three nights, the first night I must have visited three or four girls, by the third day I wasn’t interested.

When we started seeing escorts as a couple, over maybe two years we got through maybe twenty girls, now my wife is happy to fantasise, and we almost never visit escorts together.

My point is, don’t over think it, just do what’s right for you, maybe you’ll get the urge again, maybe you won’t, but you’ll be doing what you want.

Offline Ghost89

I think about my first trip to Amsterdam, or when my wife discovered women.

When I first went for like three nights, the first night I must have visited three or four girls, by the third day I wasn’t interested.

When we started seeing escorts as a couple, over maybe two years we got through maybe twenty girls, now my wife is happy to fantasise, and we almost never visit escorts together.

My point is, don’t over think it, just do what’s right for you, maybe you’ll get the urge again, maybe you won’t, but you’ll be doing what you want.

Lucky sod! Wish my other half would! We could split the bill then! :sarcastic:

Offline BobAJobMan

If you're sure you're not depressed in any way, as said it's probably just the natural ebb and flow, plus I think lockdown has played havoc with a lot of people's mood, including libido. Also, it sounds like your not in lurve... perhaps were that to happen your juices would start flowing again?
Banned reason: Claiming this site condones paedophilia, it doesn't
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Offline Bikerman

My sex drive has been low this ladt 12 month...but i work 12 hour shifts and i crave a good sleep more than anything at moment.. but if i wKe up horny i just crack one off as wife just isnt interested much..if i go for a punt i need to wank day before otherwise illl cum early ...like a massage i went for started CC swipes and i shot my load but she was good enough to wipe me down then hand job after
We all go through phases of no interest in sex ..with lockdown everyone is suffering some way.. but like i said i want a good nights sleep and im ok with that
Banned reason: Shitstiring troll
Banned by: daviemac

Offline yonimax

I think sometimes it is just that we have had our share of women and fantasies and there is nothing more to explore... the boyish curiosity is gone... having said that I always feel low in late winter  but come late spring/ summer as I get sunshine on my skin I will be perky again...   :wacko:

Offline Bonker

If you're happy with your situation, what are you looking for on here? Corroboration? Kudos?

If he's happy with his situation, why are guys trying to persuade him he's not?

Offline Doc Holliday

If you're happy with your situation, what are you looking for on here? Corroboration? Kudos?

If he's happy with his situation, why are guys trying to persuade him he's not?

Best post in the thread  :thumbsup:

Offline garfield

If you're happy with your situation, what are you looking for on here? Corroboration? Kudos?

If he's happy with his situation, why are guys trying to persuade him he's not?

Im not trying to persuade him he’s not happy, i just said he should be mentioning it to a doctor, he’s gone through quite a big physical change at a fairly young age, better to be safe than sorry

Offline king tarzan

One of my humble and Simpletto glory moments is
Having two snicker bars with a large cold glass of milk in complete silence 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🤜🤛🤜🤛👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👋👋👋👋👍👍👍👍
Banned reason: Misogynist who gets free bookings from agencies for pos reviews.
Banned by: daviemac

Offline garfield

One of my humble and Simpletto glory moments is
Having two snicker bars with a large cold glass of milk in complete silence 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🤜🤛🤜🤛👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👋👋👋👋👍👍👍👍

You lost me there

Offline Chorley

One of my humble and Simpletto glory moments is
Having two snicker bars with a large cold glass of milk in complete silence 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🤜🤛🤜🤛👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👋👋👋👋👍👍👍👍
Whatever floats your boat  :crazy:

Offline CheeseBoard

Have you lost any weight or reduced food intake (cals or carbs)?

I've done the above. I thought this would do the reverse?

Would be interesting to know why it would have the opposite effect (to what i assumed).
« Last Edit: March 21, 2021, 02:33:53 pm by CheeseBoard »

Offline Metalcrue

Go to the doctors and get them to do blood tests to check your testosterone levels. It could be low test.

With the blue pill do you get inconsistency will maintaining a hard-on?

Offline JontyR

If he's happy with his situation, why are guys trying to persuade him he's not?

Because the going rate for someone just saying what you want is about £150 an hour.

Using UKP as an echo chamber...lolz.

Offline Chorley

Because the going rate for someone just saying what you want is about £150 an hour.

Using UKP as an echo chamber...lolz.
My thoughts exactly. On reflection it's quite a strange and somewhat pointless post by the OP  :unknown:

Offline willie loman

if you have no sex drive, why are you having a wank?

Offline Doc Holliday

My thoughts exactly. On reflection it's quite a strange and somewhat pointless post by the OP  :unknown:

He does have history of starting such threads  :unknown:

Offline Metalgear2018

if you have no sex drive, why are you having a wank?

Because I don't want to be nagged by a female after sex

Offline Ali Katt

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Just a quick post: IMO people rarely talk about how happy they are.

Secondly all experiences are different, but I didn't use Viagra in my early 30s. Still don't, hopefully it will stay that way.

A lot of your reviews seem to focus on you as much as the girl. I know i do the same thing. I think you are holding a lot of resentment and overthinking it.

Offline JontyR

Because I don't want to be nagged by a female after sex

So you don't mean you don't want to have any kind of sexual activity, you just don't want to have sex with the people you can have sex with?

That's not having no sex drive. That's being bored with your available options. You are quite advanced, normally you have to be in a relatively long term relationship to get to this level of ennui.

Offline Chorley

To be perfectly blunt OP, the more I read your post, the more I think you come across as a whiny, attention seeker looking for validation.  :thumbsdown:

Offline Metalgear2018

Just a quick post: IMO people rarely talk about how happy they are.

Secondly all experiences are different, but I didn't use Viagra in my early 30s. Still don't, hopefully it will stay that way.

A lot of your reviews seem to focus on you as much as the girl. I know i do the same thing. I think you are holding a lot of resentment and overthinking it.

I think I get a lot of post nut clarity which plays on my mind. Now beginning to weigh up my options such as 1) waste my time with a girl I am bored with or (2) enjoy time with myself doing stuff I enjoy.

Offline Metalgear2018

To be perfectly blunt OP, the more I read your post, the more I think you come across as a whiny, attention seeker looking for validation.  :thumbsdown:

I'm sorry if my post come across like that.

Offline Ali Katt

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I think I get a lot of post nut clarity which plays on my mind. Now beginning to weigh up my options such as 1) waste my time with a girl I am bored with or (2) enjoy time with myself doing stuff I enjoy.
Or a third option have a great time with a girl and do all the private getting stuff done in your spare time.

Offline Payyourwaymate

Is it that you have lost the drive to have sex or the everything else that comes with the sex?

If you fully lost the drive for sexual activity you would not rather wank. As in you would not wank or have sex. I think that It seems it has become more convenient for you to wank than deal with the added variables of having sex with women and the potential stress it brings. I have no words of advice to be honest, I understand....slightly concerned but understand lol.
« Last Edit: March 22, 2021, 07:43:29 pm by Payyourwaymate »

Offline Jonestown

It seems it has become more convenient for you to wank than deal with the added variables of having sex with women and the potential stress it brings.

Isn't that what WGs are for, stress free sex ?

Offline Payyourwaymate

Isn't that what WGs are for, stress free sex ?

He has previously said he feels pressure with WGs to perform, which was linked with his money spent to get his monies worth, so for him punting is not stress free.
« Last Edit: March 23, 2021, 02:10:13 pm by Payyourwaymate »

Offline cotton

He has previously said he feels pressure with WGs to perform, which was linked with his money spent to get his monies worth, so for him punting is not stress free.
Good point , the money aspect can be stressful.
Maybe Metalgear should go back to street hookers , cheap and exciting, he seemed to enjoy it before  :thumbsup:

Offline pewpewpew

My sex drive is still there but I've lost the need to punt. I just can't be bothered at the moment. I had a test punt a few weeks ago with a girl I've seen before and it was ok but I just found that I couldn't be bothered and would rather be doing something else.

I think life in general has got us all down. Maybe in the summer when I see the girls in little skirts and low cut tops I'll have no choice

Online hendrix

Kind of odd/worrying that you need Viagra in your 30's. If you're serious about your health, get that checked out at least. You're clearly not as fit and well as you think you are.

Offline Metalgear2018

My sex drive is still there but I've lost the need to punt. I just can't be bothered at the moment. I had a test punt a few weeks ago with a girl I've seen before and it was ok but I just found that I couldn't be bothered and would rather be doing something else.

I think life in general has got us all down. Maybe in the summer when I see the girls in little skirts and low cut tops I'll have no choice

Exactly, with rona and the miserable weather playing a part i might be low in mood.

Summer time will definitely get my blood flowing the thr right areas.

Offline Dman88

Because I don't want to be nagged by a female after sex

Sounds like you have attachment issues (fear of) possibly from some kind of trauma or emotional neglect as a child.

Offline HighlyMotivated

I was beginning to have the same problem at a similar age to uou. Then I moved to a hot country and boom - my sex drive was back. The power of the sun