I don't have EAS with my reg (or she with me) whom I have been seeing for 4 years albeit with a 12 month gap in the middle. We are the best of mates and its more like "friends with benefits" these days. The arrangement suits both of us. I like my life as it is and she likes hers the way it is as well. If both parties are sensible and sane then regulars are great. I still get a kick out of seeing her and we know what makes each other tick so that only adds to the fun. If she disappeared tomorrow I would miss her - but only the same as I would miss any of my mates. My overriding thought would be how the fuck would I replace her!
There's one of my Regulars with whom I have a professional relationship which sounds a bit like yours, ellwood. I normally see her about once every three months so I'm what you might call a "Regular, but not often" client. However, we seem to have hit it off well as individuals. Even so, almost the first thing I do when she's admitted me to her working premises [after I've taken my coat off and reminded her how I take my coffee] is to hand over that day's fee.
However, I was taken aback when late last year she said that as she didn't expect to be busy between Christmas and New Year, she was planning to take her Pill so as to make sure that week would be "that time of month". She went on to suggest a "social meeting" where I would get the train over as usual but no cash would change hands and we would meet up for a couple of hours in the city centre for a meal [going Dutch] and a catch-up on where we're up to in our lives. I've never previously [or since!] had a WG suggest such an "off the meter" meeting. It was a very pleasant change, and sounds very similar to what ellwood enjoys.
When it comes to our professional meetings, though, neither of us forgets how we first came to meet. So that, while I enjoy seeing her, I've never felt anything remotely like E.A.S. for her; we both know the first rule of "Punting Club" - we're meeting for a professional fuck, not a relationship. I feel that I could echo every word of ellwood's post. In fact, as a "concerned friend" who knows what makes me tick, she helped me realise what an arse I'd made of myself when E.A.S. struck me last year.
I totally understand this and have been there. It can even extend to "pay me next time you see me"..."have that one on me as I had to cut the time short/wasn't feeling 100% so feel like I shortchanged you..we're doing an overnight next week anyway so you're paying me enough" All of that can REALLY blur lines and if you're in the wrong space mentally, it will eventually fuck you up as you might feel like you're being treated differently to other punters. And, of course, you may well be (you're possibly her biggest spending punter!) but you're STILL a punter. Ultimately, "friends with benefits" only works if the "friend" NEVER charges you for sex.
I'm not saying that's your situation btw, but it's one I've been in and luckily didn't have EAS (I never forget the money!!) but it could very easily have gone very wrong with the type of signals I was getting if I was vulnerable to it.
Equally, I take the point that hendrix makes. The first time I saw this particular WG, I enjoyed a longer visit than I'd paid for - she'd collected me from the station and had said she'd take me back there afterwards; so I wasn't going to say, "Hey, my time's up!", was I?!
So on my next visit, being a member of the species Punter fluffiensis
, I paid her not only that day's fee but also offered the difference between what I'd paid the previous time and her fee for the time I'd had. She declined the extra; and I get the feeling [I've no way of knowing, of course] that I'm far from being the only one of her Regulars who enjoys her flexible approach to time-keeping.
I'm sure that I'm by no means her biggest-spending client [seeing her quarterly, how can I be?
]; and I'm equally sure that if she thought I was showing symptoms of E.A.S. for her [as I say, neither of us has any intention of going down that road], she'd take the appropriate action.