English Please!!

[CoolTiger]

Could someone please decipher her cryptic profile and translate it into plain English, please.

External Link/Members Only or External Link/Members Only

[suffolkmark]

???????????

[tel_house]

Interview says:-

What is your Primary Language?    English

oh yes?

Not the english I was taught at school; I don't think google translate would make that bad a job of it

[Dani]

Interview says:-

What is your Primary Language?    English

oh yes?

Not the english I was taught at school; I don't think google translate would make that bad a job of it

Very strange as her blog is written in typical chavvy style text speak.  Have no idea what the profile is on about though although did think to start with that it was an attempt at poetry but then even that went as it got too ridiculous.  she moans in her blog there are too many timewasters.  I should imagine that sort of profile is not going to attract a real  punter is it

[abdul]

Could someone please decipher her cryptic profile and translate it into plain English, please.

External Link/Members Only or External Link/Members Only

Definitely an English lady but she never been to school. Well at least she can write some blogs without any full stop.

[cockneybstrd]

Her blog is in English.

And reads like she struggled quite a bit at school or as Dani has pointed out Chav style

Maybe HP has seen her and stole her password or something. As it reads a bit like one of his flowery missives

[cockneybstrd]

Definitely an English lady but she never been to school. Well at least she can write some blogs without any full stop.

People Glass Houses

[Salt]

looks like Google translate could do with some tweaking 

[vorian]

WTF is that about,  hardly an encouraging sign of a good punt is it.

[Denhamhoop]

I think its an attempt at Chaucer like poetry but owing to her being a chav fuckwit it makes no sense and just appears the rambling of a madwoman but i will say one things its different it might work for her

[akauya]

Nothing to do with being foreign or not speaking English or Google translate messing up. She/he/the pimp has filled the profile with 'filler' text like the "Lorem ipsum etc." web designers use to fill their websites before they receive proper content. Just Google some of the phrases "she" uses and you will see loads of websites with the same filler text.

Now why they are doing that is anyone's guess.

[socks]

And her feedback is bizarre. There's a chap left 2 out of 3 of them, which she has disputed  - don't know why cos they are fine. But if you click onto his feedback she has left good comments for him on the same date!

Random

[vorian]

Nothing to do with being foreign or not speaking English or Google translate messing up. She/he/the pimp has filled the profile with 'filler' text like the "Lorem ipsum etc." web designers use to fill their websites before they receive proper content. Just Google some of the phrases "she" uses and you will see loads of websites with the same filler text.

Now why they are doing that is anyone's guess.

Now that makes sense.

[Cunning Linguist]

Sounds a bit like she is doing it in the style of the shipping forecast !!

[cockneybstrd]

And her feedback is bizarre. There's a chap left 2 out of 3 of them, which she has disputed  - don't know why cos they are fine. But if you click onto his feedback she has left good comments for him on the same date!

Random

I noticed that his only other feedback was from a pre op tranny.

[Dani]

Cannot understand why she disputed the feedback unless it was because he left a review saying her place was in Normanton and no one with any sense would want to risk parking their car in that area.  I go to one of the big Asian shops there are the fruit and veg is always in season and really cheap but I go by taxi as I would not park there for any reason

[Jay-Jay]

Well size 16 and 5' 3" was enough for me ! She must look like a full bin bag.

Jay

[pleasure]

Surely it's most likely that she's had her password nicked / account hacked? Some idiot's logged into her account, replaced the profile text with gibberish, and gone through disputing her good feedback. Not very imaginative, but it seems more likely than her doing all that to her profile herself.

[vorian]

Surely it's most likely that she's had her password nicked / account hacked? Some idiot's logged into her account, replaced the profile text with gibberish, and gone through disputing her good feedback. Not very imaginative, but it seems more likely than her doing all that to her profile herself.

I have seen a lot stranger things on a profile than "Gibberish" but you might be right, the feedback is odd.

[Bangers and Gash]

'' Sarah is an absolute gem, look after her guys or you'll have me to deal with...''

Come on, own up. One of you lot must of wrote this? 

[Dani]

Surely it's most likely that she's had her password nicked / account hacked? Some idiot's logged into her account, replaced the profile text with gibberish, and gone through disputing her good feedback. Not very imaginative, but it seems more likely than her doing all that to her profile herself.

People would not waste time trying to nick her password or hack it.  She doesn't have any photos so wont make them any money from stealing her credits and she doesn't work for an agency so no one would have her password.

I just think she did not know what to put on her profile so copy and pasted this shit.  After all most of us log in every day or every few days even if we are not at work so she would have noticed someone had played with her profile or is she suddenly did not have the password for it

[vorian]

'' Sarah is an absolute gem, look after her guys or you'll have me to deal with...''

Come on, own up. One of you lot must of wrote this? 

Sounds like a Sadgit quote. 

[akauya]

Sounds like a Sadgit quote. 

Nah, he didn't bold it

[MrMan1973]

Confusing Laura boat reference the television.
Eskimos water.
Plank cat around of course...

[SirFrank]

I have no idea wtf is going on here but it's unintentionally hilarious. Thought sure it was google translate at first. She writes like Chris Eubank talks

[yorkshire123]

Classy bird though!

What is the most outrageous thing that you’ve done sexually (be honest!)   Letting somone fuck me with a large stella bottle it was amazing

[SirFrank]

Classy bird though!

What is the most outrageous thing that you’ve done sexually (be honest!)   Letting somone fuck me with a large stella bottle it was amazing

Reassuringly expensive. If imagine most chavvy birds get fucked with carling bottles. This girl is clearly a class above that

[cockneybstrd]

Reassuringly expensive. If imagine most chavvy birds get fucked with carling bottles. This girl is clearly a class above that

Those 750 ml bottles off stella are a decent size

I am surprised it wasnt a bottle of lambrini

[Johny Stone]

People would not waste time trying to nick her password or hack it.  She doesn't have any photos so wont make them any money from stealing her credits and she doesn't work for an agency so no one would have her password.

I just think she did not know what to put on her profile so copy and pasted this shit.  After all most of us log in every day or every few days even if we are not at work so she would have noticed someone had played with her profile or is she suddenly did not have the password for it

or maybe she did it on purpose for guys to think she is smart 

[Urban_G]

Reminds me of this:

External Link/Members Only

[pleasure]

People would not waste time trying to nick her password or hack it.  She doesn't have any photos so wont make them any money from stealing her credits and she doesn't work for an agency so no one would have her password.

I just think she did not know what to put on her profile so copy and pasted this shit.  After all most of us log in every day or every few days even if we are not at work so she would have noticed someone had played with her profile or is she suddenly did not have the password for it

I'll have to defer to your greater knowledge of these things Danni. Just didn't seem very feasible to me that she'd deliberately post "I've never met this guy!" against her only decent feedback.

[alessiobou]

I opened up the field report... says her name is Sarah? 

I manage the Wordpress blogs for people at my university, and most of the spam comments look a look like that... and spam comments are written by bots, not humans.

Hmm?