Xmas Punting

[Simmo87]

Boris Johnson has just released his roadmap to the end of lockdown

Boris Johnson has said he hopes for a "more significant return to normality by November", as he set out his roadmap for ending lockdown. The Prime Minister said it was his "strong and sincere hope" that social distancing will be able to come to an end by November, in time for people to enjoy Christmas.

I think there could be light at the end of the punting tunnel!

[waynekerr600]

I read the title as Christmas pudding.

Should have gone to Barnard Castle 

[Doc Holliday]

I read the title as Christmas pudding.

Should have gone to Barnard Castle 

 

Boris is talking nonsense. A degree of social distancing and cross infection control should be in place until at least the spring to reduce the level of other respiratory viruses, especially flu, which would put added strain on a system which may have to cope with a second wave? Also by spring many of the vaccines will have been evaluated for effectiveness which will dictate how we deal with Covid in the future.

[David1970]

I read the title as Christmas pudding.

Should have gone to Barnard Castle 

You need your eyes tested why not drive to the opticians, I can recommend these ones.

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[Blackpool Rock]

I read the title as Christmas pudding.

Should have gone to Barnard Castle 

And I read it that Boris looked like an Xmas Pudding 

Not sure where November comes from, that's my prediction for when we get a 2nd spike and go back into full lockdown 

[waynekerr600]

You need your eyes tested why not drive to the opticians, I can recommend these ones.

Hidden Image/Members Only

I prefer this one

Hidden Image/Members Only

[waynekerr600]

And I read it that Boris looked like an Xmas Pudding 

Not sure where November comes from, that's my prediction for when we get a 2nd spike and go back into full lockdown 

Wonder if Boris has got a point lined up for November?

[Digby232]

Best behaved virus ever. Can give dates months in advance. Next Friday we need masks in shops. 1st August safe for 5000 people to go to goodwood horse racing. October fans can start to return to football. November getting back to more  big crowds and December virtually normal. There will be no second spike that we get to know about. Can’t afford it so it won’t happen😬

[kippydon]

I think Boris, is living on another planet, he knows, he knows he has fucked up big time and just trying to soften the blow for no deal brexit , as the UK will be totally fucked if the economy does not open big time and then the hit of no deal brexit


 i a, sorry but he aint got a fecking clue

worst PM ever and that is saying a lot after the shite we had with TM

[Blackpool Rock]

Back on track chaps, remember no politics 

[unclepokey]

"Free Rectal Photography" ! That had me totally creased up.

Did someone make this up as a joke or was it actually displayed as an advert?

I can contribute another similar funny. There was once a late middle aged woman working in my area who arrived late one morning explaining that she'd had to go to the vets and have her pussy splayed.

[unclepokey]

Can't resist adding that as respects rectum and retina It's difficult to see eye to eye with one's own arse hole.

I will, I really will, this time - get me coat!

[waynekerr600]

"Free Rectal Photography" ! That had me totally creased up.

Did someone make this up as a joke or was it actually displayed as an advert?

It made my eyes water when they shoved the camera up.

I think that might have been the test. (Like when you try to join slimming world and the first thing it says on the website is 'accept cookies' - that's definitely a test)

[WASA38]

I can contribute another similar funny. There was once a late middle aged woman working in my area who arrived late one morning explaining that she'd had to go to the vets and have her pussy splayed.

Was she called Mrs Slocombe ?

[sub_marine]

Best behaved virus ever. Can give dates months in advance. Next Friday we need masks in shops. 1st August safe for 5000 people to go to goodwood horse racing. October fans can start to return to football. November getting back to more  big crowds and December virtually normal. There will be no second spike that we get to know about. Can’t afford it so it won’t happen😬

Anybody with half a brain realises that dates are irrelevant, opening thigs have to be based on less than X number of cases nationwide, with no more than 10% of X being in a single county.  I'm sure the scientists must be using cases and not dates.  If we were told that lockdown would end when less that 5000 people had covid, with the stats being published everyday, you bet people would be more careful, where as current advice is we just have to mess about till a certain date and then we can open up

[scutty brown]

ooops          no politics

[Ali Katt]

Boris Johnson has just released his roadmap to the end of lockdown

Boris Johnson has said he hopes for a "more significant return to normality by November", as he set out his roadmap for ending lockdown. The Prime Minister said it was his "strong and sincere hope" that social distancing will be able to come to an end by November, in time for people to enjoy Christmas.

I think there could be light at the end of the punting tunnel!

November is cold and flu season.

[The Film Director]

Boris is talking nonsense.

I suspect they put that briefing on so early in the day as they realise no-one is watching or listening to him anymore.

[David1970]

There will be a second spike as more people get back to their normal life, and the best guess is later in the year. October/November. Once everyone goes back to work the virus will be spread again.