Making a twat of yourself over the virus

[lostandfound]

Anyone else catch themselves being an utter prat?

Swallowed some wine down the wrong way an hour ago. Cue many minutes of very rough coughing. 

[Hobbit]

Anyone else catch themselves being an utter prat?

Swallowed some wine down the wrong way an hour ago. Cue many minutes of very rough coughing. 

Just make sure it's not disinfectant .

[Xtro]

Anyone else catch themselves being an utter prat?

Swallowed some wine down the wrong way an hour ago. Cue many minutes of very rough coughing. 

I'm so glad you swallowed, and didn't spit.      

[lostandfound]

Just make sure it's not disinfectant .

I hope not .. it was a cheap bottle though ... 

[lostandfound]

I'm so glad you swallowed, and didn't spit.      

I'm more wino, than oenophile.   

[ulstersubbie]

Swallowed some wine down the wrong way an hour ago. Cue many minutes of very rough coughing. 

Cheap plonk?   

[jeanphillipe]

Anyone else catch themselves being an utter prat?

Swallowed some wine down the wrong way an hour ago. Cue many minutes of very rough coughing. 

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Could be worse, you could be this guy...

[Logamimo]

Was walking around Sainsbury's last week doing my shopping when I developed an irritation in my throat, was desperate to have a good cough but did'nt dare - nightmare 

[Chorley]

I'll direct the OP to take a look at the US right now. 

[lostandfound]

Cheap plonk?   

Barefoot Merlot. Fine wine would be wasted on me as I tend to chuck it down my neck.

[lostandfound]

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Could be worse, you could be this guy...

If that's a genuine image I'm quite impressed he managed to get it down there!

[Tdydl]

If that's a genuine image I'm quite impressed he managed to get it down there!

I suspect that it went up rather than down.

[Doc Holliday]

If that's a genuine image I'm quite impressed he managed to get it down there!

I think you will find it entered via the other end.

Not sure what the other metal object is though?

EDIT beaten to it.

[Doc Holliday]

Just done an image search and it seems the other object is a piece of wire he tried to use (and failed) to retrieve the bottle. 

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[lostandfound]

Just done an image search and it seems the other object is a piece of wire he tried to use (and failed) to retrieve the bottle. 

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Ouch!  What possessed him? Sexual stimulation gone very wrong I suppose.

[winkywanky]

I couldn't work out why the wire (re-purposed/bent wire-coathanger?) didn't follow the path of the bottle, and then realised his bowel must have punctured for that to be the case . Just like a burst appendix, that could kill you from the resultant infection, infact perhaps even more likely because of the resultant bleeding?

And then the Daily Mail article confirms that he did indeed have a punctured colon, presumably from the wire. Yet the end is bent over so even that wouldn't have made a small hole, it would have been a nasty tear  .

The amount of pain the guy must have been in would be absolutely horrific, but obviously in his mind, tempered by the need to keep all details from the Chinese authorities at all costs  .

[Colston36]

If anyone is interested in getting good cheap wine, my next door neighbours introduced me to Portugal Vineyards, which I seriously recommend (I have worked for many years in the wine business, including for Naked Wines and others). Portugal Vineyards have a totally new pricing system. You buy from them in Portugal. They then ship to you, adding shipping, duty and so on. You have to buy at least 12 bottles. I now buy 24 at a time because that cuts shipping costs which are the same for 12 as 24. I have now imported 60 bottles since just before the latest drama began, all good, paying under £5 a bottle on average. It does take a couple of weeks for the booze to get here, but it really is excellent stuff.

[cunningman]

If anyone is interested in getting good cheap wine, my next door neighbours introduced me to Portugal Vineyards, which I seriously recommend (I have worked for many years in the wine business, including for Naked Wines and others). Portugal Vineyards have a totally new pricing system. You buy from them in Portugal. They then ship to you, adding shipping, duty and so on. You have to buy at least 12 bottles. I now buy 24 at a time because that cuts shipping costs which are the same for 12 as 24. I have now imported 60 bottles since just before the latest drama began, all good, paying under £5 a bottle on average. It does take a couple of weeks for the booze to get here, but it really is excellent stuff.

I second Portugal Vineyards - and Portuguese wines in general.  It comes out some way above 'cheap' though.  Mind you, some people do think £8 is cheap.

[winkywanky]

If anyone is interested in getting good cheap wine, my next door neighbours introduced me to Portugal Vineyards, which I seriously recommend (I have worked for many years in the wine business, including for Naked Wines and others). Portugal Vineyards have a totally new pricing system. You buy from them in Portugal. They then ship to you, adding shipping, duty and so on. You have to buy at least 12 bottles. I now buy 24 at a time because that cuts shipping costs which are the same for 12 as 24. I have now imported 60 bottles since just before the latest drama began, all good, paying under £5 a bottle on average. It does take a couple of weeks for the booze to get here, but it really is excellent stuff.

Thanks for the tip Colston, noted  .

[winkywanky]

...amazing how something good can come out of some bloke 15,000 miles away in China sticking a bottle up his arse  .

[lostandfound]

If anyone is interested in getting good cheap wine, my next door neighbours introduced me to Portugal Vineyards, which I seriously recommend (I have worked for many years in the wine business, including for Naked Wines and others). Portugal Vineyards have a totally new pricing system. You buy from them in Portugal. They then ship to you, adding shipping, duty and so on. You have to buy at least 12 bottles. I now buy 24 at a time because that cuts shipping costs which are the same for 12 as 24. I have now imported 60 bottles since just before the latest drama began, all good, paying under £5 a bottle on average. It does take a couple of weeks for the booze to get here, but it really is excellent stuff.

Thanks. Been looking at the website since I saw your post. Little cautious because when I've tried Spanish wines like Rioja and Tempranillo I've been prone to hangovers, which I haven't got from Californian and Australian Merlot and Shiraz.

Whenever there's a supermarket offer of 25% off I usually buy a bootful. Has been very convenient with click and collect. Usually get under £5 a bottle, sometimes when combined with a petrol voucher offer, under £4 a bottle. Last summer Lidl did a 25% offer and I stocked up on their South African pinotage for just under £3 a bottle. Seems to be rare they do an offer like that, whereas Asda / Tesco / Sainsbury do them more frequently.

Anyway, great tip - thanks again.