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External Link/Members Only Communication: Enquired by text and received a reply within 10 minutes. Booking made for 90 mins later although she delayed things by 45mins.
Date: December 2019
The Price: £35 for 60 mins
The Location: Her own house in Leigh, Greater Manchester. On street parking in several nearby streets. This was a dark rainy evening so not much chance of being seen by curtain twitchers.
The Girl: Quite a lot has been written about Fern over the years. She has a photo on her Whatsapp which is a good representation. Not sure about age but I’d say somewhere in her 40’s. Like most guys, I’m never sure with Thai’s. She’s not the best looking woman, I’d say 6/10 facially, but she still has a pretty good body. Her false tits look great when clothed but not so great when unleashed. Her voice can be a bit annoying but thankfully she’s not overly vocal.
The Punt: I’ve seen Fern a number of times over the years but mostly when I’ve just wanted something quick and not too far away. A few years ago I was ‘lucky’ enough to have been invited to give her fanny some oral attention. I spent a frantic 15 minutes trying to get her to cum but failed miserably due to tongue cramp and wrist numbness. In her defence she did say it was a long time since a guy had managed to get her to cum so I didn’t feel totally useless. It was partially with this in mind that I decided to visit her. That, and the fact that I felt unusually horny for a cold, wet, winters evening.
I have to say that Fern's massage is very good. In fact after 45 minutes I was enjoying the massage so much that I’d forgotten that I’d actually gone there to empty my sack. At around the 45 minute mark she’d not really gone anywhere near my cock so I thought I’d better get things started and asked her for B2B to which she simply said “okay”. Now at this point I should have asked “how much”, but I had it in my head that it was normally around £70 or £80 in total so I didn’t bother. As usual she nipped out of the room and came back a few minutes later in black bra and knickers with her tits spilling out all over the place. After dispensing with the bra she climbed on the bed and began playing with my cock. After a couple of minutes of this she removed her knickers, sat on my thigh and squirted some oil onto her tits. This naffed me off as it meant I wasn’t going to be able to get my mouth around her nipples but I decided to go with the flow. Within a minute or two she was frantically jerking me off. I tried to get her to stop or at least slow down, but she mentioned something about the time and before I knew I’d emptied my sack. At this point, feeling rather short-changed, I had it in my head that she deserved nothing more than a neutral. However, worse was yet to come.
After grabbing a quick shower and getting dressed I made my way downstairs. We had a very brief, forced chat while I put my shoes and jacket on and then went to pay her. Knowing that she was a typical Thai I decided to offer her £70, thinking she'd probably ask for more. She’d counted the money within 1.5 seconds of me handing it over and shrieked “£100, I told you £100!”. Now either I’d had a brief episode of deafness, or she was lying because I never heard her mention money, apart from saying in her initial text that her massage rate was £35/hr. There then ensued two minutes of haggling where I stupidly relented and gave her £90 and said "that’s all you’re getting", before walking out. I must be going soft in my old age but at least this episode will hopefully mean I won’t be daft enough to waste any more money on Fern.
Overall: Fern’s massage is actually very good and at £35, pretty good VFM. But, I won’t be going back.
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