Reviewed elsewhere on here, time for me to visit Friends Chinese massage in Manchester.
External Link/Members OnlyEasy place to find and very easy to travel to if you need to use the motorways. Easy parking even at a weekend, either outside if you’re brazen or down various side streets if you have sense
Stepped inside and was greeted by a not unattractive Chinese girl I found was called Yumi (you-me).
Shoes are to be left in reception (maybe don’t go in your designers then) and I was led to an okish usual massage room with a shower and what oddly looked beneath the cloth cover to be a home made massage table knocked together from pallets. Well it does the job.
Maybe it was a big mistake but I asked up front what was on offer. B2b £60. I don’t think so. She isn’t exactly a stunner where my nob did the thinking for me. After saying I may actually just go as there’s other places I’m more familiar with she said ok naked hj touching etc for £40. Oh well I agreed, maybe not a great thing as her English wasn’t good.
So I stripped and got on the table. Then began possibly the most rubbish massage I’ve ever had. Half an hour of elbows in just my back, legs left alone which is where I really needed a prod. Just forearms rubbing up and down quite hard. Hey I’m sure many on here have tried Wenlan in Hyde, well this was worse plus Wenlan is friendly.....Yumi isn’t even that. Scowl throughout and short answers to any attempt at chat.
Eventually came the turn and I motioned maybe it’s time she took these off. Ok, she stripped and got in the shower (why?). I kind of like to be able to smell who I’m with, mixture of body and perfume is a turn on, now I can’t even do that.
Anyway she started gently rubbing her tits on my chest and cock, asked did I like. Well, it’s ok I suppose. She took my cock and said time to do this. I tried rubbing her pussy but she said no not that now just this. It didn’t take me long as I was sort of wound up not knowing what was supposed to be happening. Just wanted to get out to be honest.
Anyway, description I’d say she was late 20s, bit of weight on her but ok, plain really, hairy pussy and unremarkable tits, just average. No complaints.
Back she went into the shower and then offered me the shower after she had finished.
Honestly just wanted to get out, we didn’t feel any “chemistry” there at all and if anything she just felt like a time and effort counter who I should have taken the hint off when she pushed hard for half an hour rather than the hour I pissed down the drain on a shit massage (words really can’t describe how utterly crap it was)
As I drove off I saw another girl stood outside who looked tall and athletic with an odd sort of face, not the round chinese features most of the girls have.... tell you what if you’ve ever played the video game Sleeping Dogs set in Hong Kong, well she looks like one of the girls who you can buy energy drink off.
Would I go back? Maybe but only if I can avoid Yumi. That shouldn’t be hard though as girls rotate.
Given a neutral rather than negative as so much is subjective. Just to me £70 for a shit shit massage, extras which seemed to not deliver what she promised fully and unsatisfactory wank just isn’t vfm.
