Lauren 38 Portsmouth

[nigel4498]

They are real because she is an escort not a whore.

I've seen Lauren and believe me she's a whore, she spreads her legs wide and sucks cock for a living.

[nigel4498]

Now banned and review removed to S.E. regional discussion.

[webpunter]

"High Class" Escort no doubt 

They are real because she is an escort not a whore

Here is an escort with 'finesse'
Closest i could find for high class
I kid you not it is an Escort Finesse

Edit:  fuck knows why pic is showing twice - can't delete the 2nd 


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[nigel4498]

"High Class" Escort no doubt 



  fuck knows why pic is showing twice -


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Obviously it's a high class duo.

[webpunter]

Brilliant 

Obviously it's a high class duo.

[scutty brown]

.................... I am a regular field report writer on AW and will be here now.................

Hubris rules.........

[Hantsolo]

Banned? That’s a shame as it was getting entertaining.....

What a loser, at least he/Lauren managed to get a “treat her well” comment in at the end!

[cyberstrider]

OMG don't you read my posts? Lauren had wet hair 'cos she's just showered after the previous fuck, she was drying off after a shower as I was leaving.
Give him a chance, my first review was fluffy, luckily Derrick put me on track to give factual reviews.

[Waterhouse]

"High Class" Escort no doubt 

Here is an escort with 'finesse'
Closest i could find for high class
I kid you not it is an Escort Finesse

Edit:  fuck knows why pic is showing twice - can't delete the 2nd 

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Always preferred the PSE model, myself... 
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[Dav618id]

On my thoughts, I don't think it was Lauren. Review was fluffy, it was new first review and a seasoned punter.

But another first time review that got a load of stick and everyone jumped on him.
Are they jumping on him to get there posting numbers up.

And you wonder why people don't review.

There's putters on here that says Southampton / Portsmouth is void of good working girls so they've putted but there's no negative reviews but don't get stick for not reviewing.

 The op may have improved  with new reviews but we will never know.

[winkywanky]

Always preferred the PSE model, myself... 
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Yes, the XR3 was a right dirty little slut 

[Waterhouse]

Yes, the XR3 was a right dirty little slut 

XR3 was a good upgrade, but I'm talking super hot PSE all extras included. 




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[winkywanky]

I think basically Mr. Funtomeet didn't take on board what was initially a bit of ribbing over his outrageously fluffy review. He just railed against it.

He summed up his review by saying: "We then lay on the bed and chatted like friends before Lauren offered to return the favour and go down on me. That was when I received the most perfect BJ.
All in all Lauren is the real deal and the best.
We will be friends and lovers for a long time to come" 

And then when he was taken to task over it he said: ..."she is an escort not a whore and if the meeting is a pleasure not a mess then it’s winnwin. Guess some of us have it and some don’t - hence several of the poor taste hecklers out there. Heckle all you like. If you know how to treat a girl right then it becomes a great time for all not a sad time for a looser "

And bigging himself up doesn't go down too well either 

[winkywanky]

XR3 was a good upgrade, but I'm talking super hot PSE all extras included. 




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Ah, with the turbo, is that the one that squirts? 

[timsussex]

Come on it was WAY WAY beyond fluffy

[winkywanky]

 

[Waterhouse]

Ah, with the turbo, is that the one that squirts? 

Yes... starts when you get above 3000 rpm 

[webpunter]

Hit the nail on the head
OP could have responded differently but not capable
As we're having a laarf OP is getting more & more wound up
It was too easy to press the buttons 

IMO unlikely however if the review was initiated by the burd it has back-fired
Plenty more ....

If the OP is actually FTM on Awank, he'll be off to one of his regs [a load of munters] for a cuddle
And boring the shit out of the burd & telling her all about the nasty lot on UKP
Said burd will be supportive
Ideal as ATM arrives through front door & wants a chat
Bless

I think basically Mr. Funtomeet didn't take on board what was initially a bit of ribbing over his outrageously fluffy review. He just railed against it.

Good fun when threads go slightly off-piste 

[webpunter]

Turbo lag can be a real bummer

Yes... starts when you get above 3000 rpm 

[Waterhouse]

Hit the nail on the head


Good fun when threads go slightly off-piste 

Ain't that the truth... I love it.   

[Lauren2018]

Hahaha write my own reviews? Dusty phone? I don't think so. I work when I choose. 
Derrick 101 whatever your name is you gave 5 star reviews for me so stop banging on about limited services. Ok. Your now into dildos up your arse but you was over the moon with the booking we had. Nigel 4498 you also gave me a outstanding review so you really are a little turncoat.
I am actually really shocked at how nasty and spiteful you all are. Really like a bunch of kids. Please don't any of you call me. And before you say you wouldn't anyway every review says you would come back. Please don't I only want to see genuine nice people.

[Lauren2018]

And Tim Sussex really. "I was lovely but a lot can change in 2 years" really.

[cyberstrider]

Lauren, you told me yesterday whilst you monitored UKP, you'd never post a reply. Pleased to learn your puss is smooth now, my wife didn't believe me when I told her I walked into a door. You were my first escort and I cannot thank you enough for putting me on the fun road. I'm on holiday for 8 weeks next Saturday in sunny S Africa, I'll organise a meet on return, I bet we both have some horror stories to tell. Oh, must fit in some fucking too.

[CheeseBoard]

Yes, the XR3 was a right dirty little slut 

Brings back good memories, I had a black xr3i back in the day and always got stopped by the police.  I wanted an RS2000 and a Cosworth, but never got around to getting one.  I regret not getting the Cosworth

[James999]

She's clearly got an attitude problem, perhaps years of strangers trooping through her door has taken it's toll 

[Boinky]

Good god that review was fluffier than the furry dice hanging off the rear-view mirror of the Escort PSE.

[Bunbury]

Some guys go way over the top.
It's a paid fuck, that's all it is so there's no need for all this fluffy bollocks.

[James999]

Some guys go way over the top.
It's a paid fuck, that's all it is so there's no need for all this fluffy bollocks.

You've assumed the "review" was written by a male, the reality is it could well have been written by the pro$$ie herself 

[Bunbury]

You've assumed the "review" was written by a male, the reality is it could well have been written by the pro$$ie herself 

I've seen the OP's field reports on AW.
All the same fluffy bollocks so more than likely it was him.

[James999]

Perhaps he writes them with help from pro$$ies then, as this one had a distinct female feel to it 

[Bunbury]

Perhaps he writes them with help from pro$$ies then, as this one had a distinct female feel to it 

You are probably right there, in love with prossie no doubt.

[webpunter]

Bless
Must be upsetting for the bell-end when reading reviews about the love of his [sad] life getting banged up the gary 

You are probably right there, in love with prossie no doubt.

[James999]

She's created numerous nics on here to post under, she clearly has to much time on her hands, the years appear to have caught up with her and she comes across as totally fucking mental, repeatedly creating profiles and ranting 

[DrConners]

She's created numerous nics on here to post under, she clearly has to much time on her hands, the years appear to have caught up with her and she comes across as totally fucking mental, repeatedly creating profiles and ranting 

I saw, the truth obviously hurts the daft old bat   

[riskytimes]

she looks a lot like hayley who used to be near whiteley ???

[DrConners]

she looks a lot like hayley who used to be near whiteley ???

Who cares ?  Maybe Lauren is her great Grandmother 

[Zimbaman]

I just noticed Lauren’s deleted post. Can’t believe I missed that one. Very humorous  I think that DrConnors, Nigel, James and me are on her ‘if I ever find out who you are’ hit list. Seems like she must have been drunk when writing that. Almost tempting to book her just to piss her off 

[DrConners]

Probably spends most of her down time in a drunken stupor 

Why waste time & effort when you know your going to meet an angry old lady straight out of the shower after frantically trying to wash the spunk out of her hair ? 

[cyberstrider]

You moaning fuckers, Lauren is my childhood sweetheart and you're saying nasty things about the girl I love. Lauren was my first punt when I was a kiddo at 81, I believe she shaves her puss now, after her pubes rubbed my upper lip raw, wifey never really believed I ran into a door.
Her hair's wet 'cos she does back-to back bookings, not spunk hair spray, she showered after I fucked her and was drying her puss and hair when the doorbell rang at the downstairs common entrance, I met number two on my way out,  , thought, "Been there, fucked it, sucked it, got the bruise to prove it". 

[Zimbaman]

You moaning fuckers, Lauren is my childhood sweetheart and you're saying nasty things about the girl I love. Lauren was my first punt when I was a kiddo at 81, I believe she shaves her puss now, after her pubes rubbed my upper lip raw, wifey never really believed I ran into a door.
Her hair's wet 'cos she does back-to back bookings, not spunk hair spray, she showered after I fucked her and was drying her puss and hair when the doorbell rang at the downstairs common entrance, I met number two on my way out,  , thought, "Been there, fucked it, sucked it, got the bruise to prove it". 

I can’t quite work out if you are defending Lauren or taking the piss.... it’s a fine line. There is definitely sarcasm there... but I also think you are a little smitten....

[webpunter]

Smitten

Freudian slip/s

I can’t quite work out if you are defending Lauren or taking the piss.... it’s a fine line. There is definitely sarcasm there... but I also think you are a little smitten....

[cyberstrider]

Smitten? with a whore? Gotta be joking, just my sarcasm oozing out. Only wish I were able to sell the sizzle and keep the sausage and the cash.

[DrConners]

Smitten? with a whore? Gotta be joking, just my sarcasm oozing out. Only wish I were able to sell the sizzle and keep the sausage and the cash.

Really ? Only a few posts back you wrote this :

Lauren, you told me yesterday whilst you monitored UKP, you'd never post a reply. Pleased to learn your puss is smooth now, my wife didn't believe me when I told her I walked into a door. You were my first escort and I cannot thank you enough for putting me on the fun road. I'm on holiday for 8 weeks next Saturday in sunny S Africa, I'll organise a meet on return, I bet we both have some horror stories to tell. Oh, must fit in some fucking too.

Attempting to organise a meeting on an open forum !!! Keep it on AW, this post makes you sound like a complete white knight.

We are on the same team & for the 'most' part I enjoy your contributions - do yourself a favour & read the site rules, I know you haven't.

UKP is about exchanging information & posting reviews about WG's - Not trying to blow smoke up their assholes 

If you were being sarcastic, punctuate with this guy = " "

Cheers.

[webpunter]

Me & Zimba going fishing
Had a good tug on the line
 

Smitten? with a whore? Gotta be joking, just my sarcasm oozing out. Only wish I were able to sell the sizzle and keep the sausage and the cash.