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Author Topic: Very Nearly Caught - Going To Give Up!  (Read 7363 times)

Offline dave123

If you have a wife and kids it's reasonable to punt and take the risk. But a GF? Why bother? Just ditch the GF. Thought it was just wives who didn't want sex.

Offline Daffodil

Enjoyed this post. Crumpet face indeed, I'll be using that one, thanks.

As others have said, no need to give it up, just stop punting like a fucking loon  :hi:

Offline Daffodil

I assume your girlfriend is more attractive than the prossy minger?
If so why bother?  :unknown:

I get the feeleing that there are plenty of us who punt for variety. I could be dating a sex-mad Scarlett Johansson and still punt  :music:


Offline smiths

I get the feeleing that there are plenty of us who punt for variety. I could be dating a sex-mad Scarlett Johansson and still punt  :music:

And me, the fact is one woman however much sex i might be getting with her doesnt offer me the vareity i require and want. ;)

jcdmj12

Yes, you should stop, you clearly don't have anything like the self control required for clandestine activity

Rule #1 is always maintain operational security.  If any aspect of the planned mission may result in a breach, abort immediately and have a wank. After any outing, check carefully for any security lapses and ensure countermeasures are put in place to prevent a repeat. 




Just my opinion and could be off the mark, but I think there's a stronger than strong possibility that your g/f will know that your lying. She might not have much evidence, but she'd have to be sub-normal not to know it ain't true. 40mins for beer, new area old friend, out of character. I've heard more convincing stories on Jeremy Kyle. I think you're already busted. If she can live with it without further inquisition then it's probably because you're in the last chance saloon. Think you need to be a million times more careful or just don't. I'd say for the next 6 months you need to avoid even a hint of unaccounted time.
It would be interesting to know how old you are. It you're over say 25, me thinks you have a bit of a problem.
« Last Edit: January 24, 2014, 11:02:37 AM by vinnyfx101 »

Offline PD11

Just my opinion and could be off the mark, but I think there's a stronger than strong possibility that your g/f will know that your lying. She might not have much evidence, but she'd have to be sub-normal not to know it ain't true. 40mins for beer, new area old friend, out of character. I've heard more convincing stories on Jeremy Kyle. I think you're already busted. If she can live with it without further inquisition then it's probably because you're in the last chance saloon. Think you need to be a million times more careful or just don't. I'd say for the next 6 months you need to avoid even a hint of unaccounted time.
It would be interesting to know how old you are. It you're over say 25, me thinks you have a bit of a problem.


That's very well said, it's made me think that. I'm bang on 25 btw.

Offline potato

Dear oh dear Mr OP, so many schoolboy errors.  If she wasn't on to you before, she is now.  I remember along time back when I had planned a safe incall and the girl was drenched in perfume even though I had asked for "showered only".  I still went through with the meeting as I had a back up plan in place - on the way home, I popped into the Petrol Station and filled up with diesel - deliberately spilling some on my hands and jeans, wiping my hands on my shirt...  I got home and she could smell the diesel a mile off - into the shower to remove all traces and the clothes straight into the wash on their own.....

Offline Tailpipe

I assume your girlfriend is more attractive than the prossy minger?
If so why bother?  :unknown:


Rule number one for me is has to be better Looking than Wife or GF or whats the point. second Thoughts may be its the need for a BJ  :D :D  Or the need not to here
can you hurry up as I want to read me book.  :scare:

Roland D Hay


Rule number one for me is has to be better Looking than Wife or GF or whats the point.

If you ever get caught TP, I'd not use this point in your defence!  :D

Offline Taggart


Rule number one for me is has to be better Looking than Wife or GF or whats the point.


Excellent point. I tend to chose ladies who, secretly, I'd like as GFs or whatever.
There is simply no point in paying to shag an old minger - or a young one for that matter.

Walking away from a session with an attractive female gives me a sense of satisfaction. Yes, I can be a bit of a smug bastard.

Offline Tailpipe

If you ever get caught TP, I'd not use this point in your defence!  :D


I did get caught and I took financial "A"  , But some things are better unsaid.  However I do recall "why did you feel the need" answer "how many years has it been since you last
gave me a BJ as I make it over 10 " However this only resulted in damage to the Door of my car was a Aston as had money then .  :scare:

They take as much money in the Divorce as they can to make them better about providing second class sex for the entire marriage.

Since the growing cynic.   

Message to all wife's who still provide good service , my apologies for been a cynic as I am sure there must be some good ones out there, 

Roland D Hay


I did get caught and I took financial "A"  , But some things are better unsaid.  However I do recall "why did you feel the need" answer "how many years has it been since you last
gave me a BJ as I make it over 10 "

Oh well. Better than my ex wife who had no problem whatsoever providing a wide range of sexual services including BJ and A, only problem was that she was providing them to a number of other gents too.... And she still got a shot load of money!

Offline CBPaul

As others have said, I think you have been caught OP, not almost caught. Any woman not suspicious of your behavior would have to be devoid of her senses, well at least a couple of them. They can smell perfume that isn't theirs from 2 miles and will notice the change of clothes in a second. I hope the offending shirt isn't still stashed under the bed. Taking and age to get the beer you don't drink will have her on high alert on your return and rushing off to grab a shower won't have helped.

I don't think you need to give up full stop but you do need to taker a break if you want to keep the GF and also evaluate your punting technique.

Personally I never punt within 10 miles of home and always leave several hours before being due back home. 

Dear oh dear Mr OP, so many schoolboy errors.  If she wasn't on to you before, she is now.  I remember along time back when I had planned a safe incall and the girl was drenched in perfume even though I had asked for "showered only".  I still went through with the meeting as I had a back up plan in place - on the way home, I popped into the Petrol Station and filled up with diesel - deliberately spilling some on my hands and jeans, wiping my hands on my shirt...  I got home and she could smell the diesel a mile off - into the shower to remove all traces and the clothes straight into the wash on their own.....

Textbook. :thumbsup:

cjkanye02


Rule number one for me is has to be better Looking than Wife or GF or whats the point. second Thoughts may be its the need for a BJ  :D :D  Or the need not to here
can you hurry up as I want to read me book.  :scare:

Better looking Mrs is not much use if your Mrs doesn't put out. This would put me in a right quandry as my wife is knockout gorgeous but seems to have retired from sex.

Roland D Hay

I don't agree that the girl has to be better looking. We look for all sorts of different things in working girls, primarily variety. Sure punting with girls that might be out of your league is a factor but sometimes I just see a girl who is sexy, not necessarily stunning. The body and not the face is the prime draw for me. Some Lothario once said, 'show me a beautiful wife and I'll show you a husband that's sick of fuckin her.'

Offline Daffodil

Textbook. :thumbsup:

It's certainly a means to an end, but ruining your clothes to escape detection? Not in my textbook.

Offline Daffodil

I don't agree that the girl has to be better looking. We look for all sorts of different things in working girls, primarily variety. Sure punting with girls that might be out of your league is a factor but sometimes I just see a girl who is sexy, not necessarily stunning. The body and not the face is the prime draw for me. Some Lothario once said, 'show me a beautiful wife and I'll show you a husband that's sick of fuckin her.'

Agree. Looks are important to me, but they certainly don't have to look better than the missus. Lots of factors at play.

I don't even consider the majority of prossies to be particularly good looking. I still fuck them though  :cool:

Most of my punts are when I am away on business. If I punt in my own town it's always when the GF is away so I can come home to empty house.

 peterdraper11 is clearly not a planer.

We can't speculate on him being a planer or not.

He's certainly not a planner though.

Offline webpunter

What a great item to read for 'friday fun'
Sure a % of UKP members must have been there in some form or another
But not to quite such a degree as Mr Draper
Funny reading his hilariously written a/c of events & the panic which set in & developed further
Priceless
Love the comparison to nicking stuff from woolies - aged all of 6
Couple of good points made - including not speeding & creating distance / not shitting on own doorstep etc
I try & plan stuff with military precision to include an alibi for being in a place at a certain time etc

Only time i've come close so far [touch wood] is when i accidentally left directions / road etc on a piece of paper in my jacket top pocket
Hung this up on the hook on getting back in
Put on the jacket next day - trying to find something & hey presto - find the paper
Had a horrible shivery feeling go right down my spine & my stomach tightened up.  Lasted a good 5mins.  Close shave
Was then time for a mental note to self - 'don't fuck up in the future'
And think stuff through forwards & backwards to cover tracks

Good luck to the crumpet muncher !

Offline SirPhilipXX

Thanks for the comic tale - very enjoyable.

So glad I'm divorced. Poorer maybe but definitely wiser.  :)

Dear oh dear Mr OP, so many schoolboy errors.  If she wasn't on to you before, she is now.  I remember along time back when I had planned a safe incall and the girl was drenched in perfume even though I had asked for "showered only".  I still went through with the meeting as I had a back up plan in place - on the way home, I popped into the Petrol Station and filled up with diesel - deliberately spilling some on my hands and jeans, wiping my hands on my shirt...  I got home and she could smell the diesel a mile off - into the shower to remove all traces and the clothes straight into the wash on their own.....

That's freaky - I have used exactly same ploy with the  diesel!!!
 
Blackburnian


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