Disclaimer 1: Gorgeous Vicky did not get a visit from THE Sex God TM (Belgarion) but rather the cheap Brummie imitationDisclaimer 2: The only way to approach what transpired in this punt is to laugh about it. The lady in question: External Link/Members OnlySeen on recent tour to Brum. She only has UKE presence now. Advertises on there when she tours.
Preamble:Last solo punt was in February 2017 when I decided solo punting was not for me. Still dipped into the forums (UKP/ UKE) because the occasional popcorn thread always provides light amusement. When Vicky announced a Brum tour, I just could not resist. Some of her reviews have bordered on hyperbolic, and I knew she would be THE ONE to make all my punting dreams come through i.e. those dreams where I fuck a lady for a whole 10 minutes non stop, in 400 positions, and make her come 60 times. For me she would make punting GREAT AGAIN.
Booking/ Comms: ExcellentStraightforward messages on UKE. I requested "Sensual GFE". Also advised that I was a "one pop" guy so for slow buildup. She provided some instructions about confirming on the day.
The Lady in Question: ExcellentIt's clear from all the reviews that she lives up to her moniker of "Gorgeous Vicky". She is a splendid physical specimen indeed- Stunning blonde (a prettier Christina Applegate, and bigger eyes), gym-toned body (she's definitely one of those regular hotties you see at the gym that spur you on to run a bit harder on the treadmill), and has a vibrant/ energetic demeanour.
Meet Details: Vicky was on tour. Functional service apartments in City Centre (near the NIA). Her rates are on UKE.
The Meet:No Sex God would admit to needing some assistance, but perhaps due to a mental blockage, the little one does not rise to the occasion without some chemical boost (only a scenario that happens for me during sex with WG) so a blue pill was popped an hour before the meet. Considered taking 2 for "double the power" but the thought of "double the headache" meant only one was popped.
Arrived and parked well ahead of time. Whatsapp started beeping like crazy- "situation" at home that meant I might need to head back. Not a great start. With outcome of situation uncertain, I decided to proceed with the punt anyway.
As I walked towards the building, serious thoughts flashed through my head. If Vicky was as spectacular as her reviews suggest, she might fling the door open, and I would simply jizz in my pants immediately just on sight alone. To prevent this eventuality I figured it was best to avoid too much eye contact at the beginning just in case she could induce instant pop just by hypnotic gaze.
Made my way to her room (which did involve getting a touch of rain- those who visited Vicky this tour would understand) and the magic door opened.
As per plan, I made my greetings without too much eye contact and hurdle was cleared. Looking from the corner of my eye she was clearly incredibly good looking, dressed in simple lingerie (as per request). £££ handed over; offer of shower accepted.
While in shower, phone beeping again. Sigh. Situation seemed uncertain. In times of trouble I turn to my best friend: so I looked at mini me (still limp) and asked for his counsel. Unsurprisingly he advised us to go ahead with the punt.
So back into the room and Vicky was lying enticingly on the bed. She was gazing at me like the Sex God I believed I was and in that moment I knew I had to come up and utter a killer line to bring the punt to the next sensual level. So I looked at her straight in the eye and said "Do you mind if I bring my phone in here. There's a situation at home with the XXX". She said yes so I placed my phone on the bedside table and sat on the bed.
She began some sensual kissing. As she was kissing me I was asking myself "How am I supposed to kiss?". Her tongue was this way and that, it felt fucking awesome but I had no clue what to do except stick my tongue in some random directions and varying how open/ closed my mouth was.
Cue beeping of phone. She stopped and said "It's okay if you need to get that". Given I was feeling pretty good, it could have been a nuclear bomb going off at home for all I cared. I managed to utter "No it's fine, carry on". She continued kissing me, moving down to my neck and body.
Phone started beeping again. I put my hand on Vicky gently and said "I think I better get that".
Checked phone. Situation at home under control. Finally.
Came back to bed. Cue some banter to get going again. Vicky apologised if she was making me "uncomfortable". At this point the blue pill headache was pounding away like a subarachnoid haemorrhage but I didn't feel like admitting to Vicky I was having a Viagra headache. I tried to reassure her that my discomfort had nothing to do with her.
She initiated the kissing again and moved down south. At this point I am sort of on my back, but lying semi propped up on the bed (this is important for later). Thanks to chemicals mini me is standing up and Vicky begins a pretty incredible BJ. The girl can really DT (as per many reviews); she took all 3 inches of me down to the hilt without batting an eyelid- quite an achievement.
Now I can feel Vicky is holding herself back, maybe because I had requested a "sensual GFE" and slow build up. So she may have been surprised when I said "I'd really like to fuck you now."
At this point, I had not moved position at all.
She puts on the condom with her mouth; and the next thing I know she is riding me in CG. So I've got this gym toned, super fit blonde writhing on me and moaning softly and in my head I am thinking "What the hell am I supposed to do?" My position has not changed- I am still on my back, lying semi propped up on the bed. I was thinking- Do I thrust my hips up and down, do I throw in some side to side movement to generate angles, what the fuck does one do?
It was about at this point that I realised I was not a Sex God after all. In fact, I dont have a fecking clue how to have sex with a stranger.
I gently asked Vicky to stop and she obliged. Cue more apologies from her if I was "uncomfortable".
So we just lay back and chatted a while. Slightly awkward atmosphere lifted somewhat.
I told Vicky I better make a move and she advised that I still had a chunk of time. She was a fine sight in all her naked glory but not even Aphrodite could have raised mini me, who had sunken to the depths of despair having realised that he had failed in his duties as a dick.
So a quick shower and escorted to the door by Vicky (still in her naked splendour) to end what will likely be the last punt (with intercourse anyway) for some time. Can never say never.
ConclusionVicky rated a resounding positive because she was impeccable in looks, attitude, demeanour and service delivery.
But whoever said sex was easy was lying
In my case anyway. In my very limited punting career I have managed to see quite a few of "Brums' Finest" (Gorgeous Vicky/ Michelle Independent/ Isla Brooks/ Emily Blonde/ XHannahX). With 2 of them I couldn't even get myself into a frame of mind to punt even when in the same room with the sultry minxes.
Punting and Brum Wayfarer is just proving a square peg in a round hole.
I will just have to live my punting dreams through the rest of you Sex Gods haha.
Topic: Gorgeous Vicky (Birmingham) gets a visit from the Sex God* (Read 4289 times)