Author Topic: What they say / what they mean (Read 3945 times)

sixtyten · « **on:** January 04, 2014, 11:44:39 am »

What they say: I absolutely love anal
What they mean: Easy way to make another £50

What they say: I like to chat first and get to know you
What they mean: I like to do bugger all and get paid for it

What they say: I only do that with my partner
What they mean: Easy way to make more cash

What they say: I'm running a little late
What they mean: I'm with another punter, it was unplanned but hey, I'm making some more cash

Any more?

Corus Boy · « **Reply #1 on:** January 04, 2014, 01:12:54 pm »

dilettante · « **Reply #2 on:** January 04, 2014, 01:23:59 pm »

What they say: You won't be disappointed
What they mean: Who gives a fuck what you think of my lousy service, there's plenty more suckers where you came from

sixtyten · « **Reply #3 on:** January 04, 2014, 01:31:13 pm »

What they say: I can't go on top
What they mean: I'm lazy besides why work for money

Jvosta · « **Reply #4 on:** January 04, 2014, 01:31:45 pm »

'would you like a shower?'

Means

'wash yourself you dirty shit, oh and by the way its included in your hour, so please....take your time in there'

Madone1 · « **Reply #5 on:** January 04, 2014, 01:32:54 pm »

And the classic

What they say- I'm a sexy curvy Milf.
What they mean- I'm fat and old enough to be your mother.

Jimmyredcab · « **Reply #6 on:** January 04, 2014, 01:34:00 pm »

What they say ---------- I only see two punters each day.

What they mean ------ I see as many as I can fit in.

Sailormack · « **Reply #7 on:** January 04, 2014, 01:48:01 pm »

I enjoy overnights..... Getting paid to sleep, does it get any better?

2 hours social time / 1 hour private time .... I will stuff my fat face with as much free food and drink I can manage for twice as long as you EXPECT to fuck me.

Holiday bookings welcome, but everything must be agreed before hand.... I'm looking for a mug to take me away from the pimp for a week and give me the life of luxury that I crave but don't expect to fuck me too much while I'm enjoying myself.

DFK at discretion... there is no fucking way I'm french kising some overweight cnut who is old enough to be my dad, but name me an easier way which is guaranteed to increase bookings without actually doing anything ?

Reduced rates today only... my pimp needs more drugs

Curvy..... obese

MILF.... over the hill

I enjoy seeing gentlemen.... any mugs out there who won't fuck me too hard?

Jimmyredcab · « **Reply #8 on:** January 04, 2014, 01:53:14 pm »

What they say ----------- I enjoy longer bookings.

What they men ------ I prefer the fee on longer bookings.

James999 · « **Reply #9 on:** January 04, 2014, 02:17:59 pm »

What she says BBW
What she means Mornbidly Obese

What she says Curvy
What she means Fat

What she says Friendly
What she means Desperate

What she says Discrete location
What she means Towerblock

What she says Like to relax clients
What she means Like to waste time

What she says Offer a profesional masage
What she means Like to waste time

What she says CIM
What she means Will pull away at last min and try and make it appear an accident

What she says I pay Tax
What she means I think benefits are paid after tax

What she says Independant
What she means Pimp

What she says Good English
What she means The person who answers the phone can speak a bit of English

What she says Petite & Busty
What she means Short and Fat

What she says Prefer longer appointments
What she means Like to waste time

What she says Uniforms available
What she means Have an old shirt somewhere

What she says Have lingerie if you wish me to wear it
What she means Have primark hold ups somewhere

What she says Shower Facilities
What she means A cold tap and a damp towel

What she says Fresh for each client
What she means Had a wipe over with a wet wipe before you arrive

What she says I like clients to be punctual
What she means I book clients back to back

What she says I'll give you the address when you arrive
What she means I book back to back and need to make sure the last guys gone before you knock on the door

What she says Genuinely Bi offering Threesomes
What she means Will fake it with a mate for double the fee

What she says Love seeing couples
What she means I can charge extra for less work

What she says Advance bookings preferred
What she means So I can cram as many in as possible

What she says The landlords coming I have to Cancel
What she means A better booking (More money) has come in

What she says I have to cancel because, my grans died, my cats in the vet or whatever
What she means A better booking (More money) has come in

What she says Not a clockwatcher
What she means I hide the clock so you don't realise I've clipped your time till you are dressed and gone

What she says A genuine squirter
What she means Can Piss on demand

What she says Genuineley love my job
What she means No other option

What she says Don't ask for discounts
What she means Discounts available, please ask

What she says Genuine GFE
What she means Moody

What she says Bareback available
What she means Already infected so don't care

What she says Regular GUM checks
What she means Collect free condoms once a year, no checks though, no bastards seeing my fanny without paying

What she says Loves big cocks
What she means Banged out

What she says Experienced
What she means Been at it for years and banged out

What she says Spacious apartment
What she means Have to do it in the lounge as the kid is in the bedroom

What she says Free Parking
What she means On an industrial estate

What she says Please pay in cash
What she means Pimp doesn't have a bank account / dealer only takes cash

What she says Gifts welcome
What she means Pimp sometimes lets me keep these if they are not easy to sell

What she says Discretion assured
What she means Have no friends to tell anyway

What she says Experienced international traveller
What she means Been to the Isle of wight on a school trip

What she says Genuine student
What she means Unemployed & on benefits

What she says Degree educated
What she means Left school before exams

What she says Available for social meets & dinner dates
What she means Looking for idiots to pay me to do nothing or eat

What she says Overnights welcome
What she means I like mugs who pay me to sleep

What she says Tight Pussy
What she means I won't open my legs fully

What she says Trendy surroundings
What she means Matress on the floor

What she says My friend can join in
What she means I work in a brothel

What she says Fresh crisp towels
What she means Dried on radiator and previous clients spunk crisp

What she says Love roleplay
What she means Anything to waste time

What she says Outcalls only
What she means Hotels have barred me

myothernameis · « **Reply #10 on:** January 04, 2014, 02:51:54 pm »

What she says I don't do bareback
What she means For £100 I might

Jimmyredcab · « **Reply #11 on:** January 04, 2014, 02:57:25 pm »

What she says --- I am fully independent.

What she means ------- Winston handles the finances.

PuntingPete · « **Reply #12 on:** January 04, 2014, 03:11:41 pm »

So reading all the above, does it mean that when she says I have a nice big cock she doesn't mean it?

Jimmyredcab · « **Reply #13 on:** January 04, 2014, 03:14:27 pm »

What she says -------- I need time to shower between bookings.

What she means ----- I use a wet wipe occasionally.

sixtyten · « **Reply #14 on:** January 04, 2014, 03:20:23 pm »

Quote from: PuntingPete on January 04, 2014, 03:11:41 pm

So reading all the above, does it mean that when she says I have a nice big cock she doesn't mean it?

Which reminds me;

What she says: Anal at discretion
What she means: You have a massive cock big boy
What she really means: One way traffic but it will bring the punters in if I say it

Rickrabbit · « **Reply #15 on:** January 04, 2014, 03:22:48 pm »

Quote from: PuntingPete on January 04, 2014, 03:11:41 pm

So reading all the above, does it mean that when she says I have a nice big cock she doesn't mean it?

PuntingPete...in this day and age she might actually mean it, especially when you turn up only to find that she is pre-op!

dilettante · « **Reply #16 on:** January 04, 2014, 04:19:45 pm »

What she says: XXX at discretion
What she means: Didn't you just read I was 'discrete'? - far too 'discrete' for that then!!

What she says: You will have a big smile on your face when you leave
What she means: You'll be so fucking relieved you made it out alive

potato · « **Reply #17 on:** January 04, 2014, 04:48:49 pm »

I'm from Italy
I'm Romanian

I'm from <insert country>
I'm Romanian

I will arrive at your home discreetly
My pimp will park right outside your house and play loud boom boom music for the duration I am with you. I will walk to your front door dressed in a short skirt, high heels and cheap stockings whatever the weather, probably still wiping my crotch with a wet wipe from the last punter. When your time is up my pimp will beep his horn continually until he sees me leave your house

Please take a look at my Private Gallery
I need the cash to display my "available today" on AW
OR
I want to scam some money out of you....

I never respond to text messages
I have no credit on my phone as usual....

My pictures are all genuine and recent
I genuinely nicked them off the internet only this morning...

I have been on Babestation
I want to charge you more money

I have appeared in porn films
My Boyfriend took some dodgy shots with a webcam - and now I can charge you more money

I can wear a strap on for you
See how it feels you bastard

I am a financial Dominatrix
I just want your money, don't ever ask for sex

LL · « **Reply #18 on:** January 04, 2014, 05:00:23 pm »

What she says: Cum as many times as you can
What she means: I like to have fag breaks during your booking with me and having one after each time you've cum is a convenient excuse.

What she says: 23 years old.
What she means: 33 years old.

What she says: I'm a professionally trained masseuse.
What she means: Well I'm not really but then it's just me rubbing my hands up and down your back, so how difficult can it be?

What she says: This week only - special rate.
What she means: I'm behind on my rent so I'm going to be banging even more clients this week.

What she says: I'm 2 minutes walk from the train station.
What she means: It's a 20 minute trek up a steep fucking hill.

Daffodil · « **Reply #19 on:** January 04, 2014, 05:10:10 pm »

James, brilliant

Must have taken you some time. I'm surprised you didn't trot out your 'educated to a degree' line when she says, 'degree educated'.

Particularly enjoyed:

Quote from: James999 on January 04, 2014, 02:17:59 pm

What she says Genuine GFE
What she means Moody

Daffodil · « **Reply #20 on:** January 04, 2014, 05:11:50 pm »

Do you smoke?

She says: Yes.
She means: 40 a day.

She says: socially.
She means: 20 a day.

She says: No.
She means: I'm a liar

Roland D Hay · « **Reply #21 on:** January 04, 2014, 07:00:46 pm »

My little contribution...

New in town- I've changed my profile due to bad feedback
Verified member- Thank fuck AW accepted that picture I stole from Google images.
Private apartment- Council flat
Busty- I've had implants
Stunner-you will be stunned at how I've taken liberties with the word stunner
English- I have very little else on which to market myself
Special offer- no one is willing to pay my ridiculous rates
Partner accompanies me to bookings- pimp accompanies me to bookings
Barely legal teen- illegal teen
Horny- My cunt is hammered and I don't care if I ever have sex again.
Sexy ass- flat chested
Angel- I fell from heaven but landed on my face
Tanned- I've tried everything to hide my stretch marks
Bi-curious- straight
Classy- I'm a Chav but I'm pitching for rich punters
Reassuringly expensive- I'm a Chav but I'm pitching for rich punters
I'm on holiday- I have a fake profile
Size 12- Size 18
No face pics to protect my privacy- I'm an ugly twat
If Carlsberg made escorts- You will need to be wearing beer goggles to fuck me and I recommend several cans of special brew prior to our appointment.
Cougar- I'm in my sixties
Lady- I'm in my fifties
Bareback- I hate all men and hope to give you all Aids
Independent- I wasn't attractive enough to be taken on by the agency.
Discerning- please wash your cock before appointment
Courtesan- I'm up my own arse
I love my job- I hate my job
Bubbly- I'm fat
Massive boobs- massive everything
Sophisticated- I smoke Pall Mall

Jack_soa · « **Reply #22 on:** January 04, 2014, 07:23:54 pm »

What they say: I Speak English
What they mean: I speak enough English to tell you no, and convieniently can't when you mention my profile.

Sailormack · « **Reply #23 on:** January 04, 2014, 07:26:26 pm »

Quote from: Jack_soa on January 04, 2014, 07:23:54 pm

What they say: I Speak English
What they mean: I speak enough English to tell you no, and convieniently can't when you mention my profile.

Like most foreigners, they speak English when it suits them

SirFrank · « **Reply #24 on:** January 05, 2014, 11:09:23 am »

At my discretion...... No fucking chance

SirFrank · « **Reply #25 on:** January 05, 2014, 11:14:15 am »

34....... 44

dilettante · « **Reply #26 on:** January 05, 2014, 11:17:42 am »

What they say: I offer a full professional relaxing service for discerning gentlemen
What they mean: I strip off, suck your dick, get you to cum ASAP, get rid of you.

CBPaul · « **Reply #27 on:** January 05, 2014, 02:22:48 pm »

Says I'm expert at massage
Means I will spend as long as possible slowly giving a shit massage before wanking you off so hopefully you won't get hard again in the time and I don't even have to blow you, let alone fuck. AND I can send and receive texts too. Bonus

Says I love receiving oral
Means Great, I can lay back and let you do the work - you're only paying after all.

English
Says 20
Means 25

EE
Says 20
Means 30

Oriental
Says 20
Means 50

Excellent stuff by the way James

SirFrank · « **Reply #28 on:** January 05, 2014, 05:59:44 pm »

Size 12 - 18+

FLYING BLUE · « **Reply #29 on:** January 05, 2014, 06:07:07 pm »

SAY'S - wow, You actually made me cum, not many guys can do that to me..

TRANSLATES AS - That's your ego massaged you pig ugly fuckin low life punter

SirFrank · « **Reply #30 on:** January 05, 2014, 06:22:33 pm »

Wow you've got a big cock - yawn I've seen it all before you average fucker

squeezebox · « **Reply #31 on:** January 05, 2014, 06:28:53 pm »

She says: I'm really passionate and give you nice time.
She means: I've got a Rottweiler in the other room that'll lick your face/arse for £30 extra.

She says: My pictures are real.
She means: The ones on the mantelpiece were taken 30 years ago.

She says: Willing to be your travel companion.
She means: Take me back to Bucharest/Sofia as I can't get any benefits for 3 months.

She says: I'm a high class stunning companion
She means: You'll be tazored by my pimps/bodyguards if you turn up for the appointment.

She says: French Kissing allowed.
She means: I like garlic, and have will chew on some just before you arrive.

She says: I like to receive rimming.
She means: I can't afford any toilet paper.

Jimmyredcab · « **Reply #32 on:** January 05, 2014, 08:35:02 pm »

What she says ----- I only see gentlemen.

What she means ----- I will see anyone who pays the fee.

tightfoot69 · « **Reply #33 on:** January 06, 2014, 02:36:59 am »

She says: I am highly educated
She means: I went to school once

She says: I take great pride in my hygiene
She means: I use wet wipes between punters

She says: I offer an unrushed service
She means: I want to talk most of the punt

She says: Due to problems in the past I do not see black or asian men
She means: I am a racist

She says: I have curves in all the right places
She means: I am too lazy to lose weight

dantheman · « **Reply #34 on:** January 06, 2014, 09:54:31 am »

She says... Have you put it in yet.
She means.... I've got a cunt like the Dartford tunnel, try fisting me, i might actually feel something.

SirFrank · « **Reply #35 on:** January 06, 2014, 11:07:01 am »

Curvy - fat
Hourglass figure - fat
Size 12 - (yeah) fat
Pretty face - fat
Womanly - fat

Member Benefits

Author Topic: What they say / what they mean (Read 3945 times)

dilettante

Jvosta

Sailormack

James999

dilettante

potato

LL

Roland D Hay

Sailormack

SirFrank

SirFrank

dilettante

SirFrank

SirFrank

squeezebox

dantheman

SirFrank