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Author Topic: Earth wellness spa Middlesborough, disappointing  (Read 1615 times)

Offline TheGrump

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A mixed bag of reviews for this place, but I gave it a go. First off, as said by others, it is a very conspicuous location, provided anybody watching knows what the place is. I’d called ahead and booked an hour to get a good massage, whatever the further outcome.

Walked in, looks sparse and a bit shabby. Young girl on counter was not particularly great looking, told me to sit on sofa, which was stained and grubby.

Much older and rougher looking woman soon came out of side room with previous customer. Fast turn around. He was out of the door, I paid £40 and taken straight in. Told to strip and she left the room.

Room had a stale sweaty smell and the “mood lighting” was provided by two, three colour led spot lights in the ceiling, one had a flyer for an insurance company taped over it, the other a square of kitchen roll. Call it budget dimmer switch I guess.

Already feeling I’d made a mistake I stripped and lay on bed, proper table with paper covering, only plus point. The rough woman came back. She was small but looked as though she was fully capable of knocking seven shades of shite out of me should she wish. Very little talking. Her hands were very rough, she skimped on the oil throughout, resulting in unpleasant dragging on my skin, also she dug in painfully with her thumb a lot. The room felt very exposed as I could hear other customers talking outside or in an adjoining room. She slid in Close a few times.

Once flipped she massaged top half before offering extras. At first I couldn’t understand her, but she shook my cock to make it clear. Wanted £20 for HE and £40 for B2B. I tried to get b2b for £30 but she wasn’t having it. I decided I would still go for the b2b though. She stripped, not a great body, poor tits. Spent a lot of time licking my nipples, which I found a bit weird. Eventually got between my legs for a tit wank. It was ok but she was not good and I really didn’t find her attractive. Once done she carried on massage but I’d really had enough and wanted to go. Was glad one it was over.

Overall this was the seediest place I’ve been. Basically a shit hole just like the rest of Teesside. I won’t be back.

Offline Shitehawk

Not sure whether to be impressed that you bothered to go for the extras or think you're mad after that review!!
I think I'd have just 'enjoyed' the massage and got the hell out of there!!

Offline CELICA GT

 :scare: your last sentence says it all  :thumbsdown:

Bluespot

  • Guest
Like you said, mixed bag, they change so fast you never see the same girl twice. Some are good, occassionally bloody brilliant, some are total crap, but theres no way of telling what youre going to get.

Offline catweazle

Like you said, mixed bag, they change so fast you never see the same girl twice. Some are good, occassionally bloody brilliant, some are total crap, but theres no way of telling what youre going to get.

Totally agree. Just the same at Jasmine in Darlo and places like Siriporn and Pimzen in Bradford.

Offline sparkus

Like you said, mixed bag, they change so fast you never see the same girl twice. Some are good, occassionally bloody brilliant, some are total crap, but theres no way of telling what youre going to get.

I'm based in London but read all the regions' reviews, seems only a small number of places are avoiding the glut of Chinese 'farmers wives' who are swamping the shops at the moment...