External Link/Members OnlySo first impressions from her voice and the way she spoke during the initial phone call gave me the impression that she may have been a bit retarded (can you say that word anymore even?!?) or had some kind of learning difficulty but against my better judgment i went on anyway.
Gave me directions to iceland on newtownards road then call from there. When i did she then told me to double back - this is the bloody lower n'ards road peak rush hour, not exactly easy or convenient to do esp when in a hurry.
Anyway got to next landmark, then the next, then guided by phone. Its like a flippin krypton factor event by this stage but again against my judgment i went on.
Door opened, shes behind door in darkness and tells me to go through then she follows me in.
Im sure shes a nice person and i feel bad saying this ... But ... Imagine if you will, the face of the Goonies fella (hey you guuuyyys) with the square shaped dried out straw quality hair of worzel gummidge. Am not exaggerating here.
Wanted to leave but legs would not actually work from surprise and shock.
£60 for 30 mins handed over and she strips. Now the pics in the profile look ok but lets just say theres a lot of structuring and support there. Everything south of winter.
Said i just wanted OWO and she said no she doesnt do it. Only covered. I couldnt even be arsed at this point arguing that her adultwork ad said she does.
Rubber on, which she tells me is a sensitive one. She clearly meant that it robs you of any sensation at all as i couldnt feel dick (literally).
Then on with the worst O routine you could imagine. I almost asked her if she wanted me to show her how to do it. She must have held her breath when sucking as she kept doing these really loud air intake gasps. Obviously wanting to further enhance the sensation for me!
In the end i couldnt even get/stay hard so i just asked her to use her hands, shot and ran screaming for the hills throwing people behind me.
Worst experience ever.
