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External Link/Members Only Recently booked the misnamed 'VIP' Olivia in Cheltenham for 30mins @ £80. Ouch.
This was one of the worst punts I have ever had - and I've had many meetings with Romanians over the years. And at least they're cheaper than this rip-off merchant.
I ignored some warning signs and my own advice to other punters on here.
Unfortunately, my judgment on this occasion was severely impaired after a dreadful week, I wanted a punt and there were very few options in the area that day. Not that there are lots of escorts in Gloucestershire on a good day.
The woman:Stated age of 39 seems to be honest because she doesn't look to be in her 40s. She's larger than her AW pictures suggest - I reckon she's a size 14 - but the facial photos are accurate, so she's probably a 4/10.
Hidden Image/Members OnlyI could barely understand what she was saying a lot of the time as she was babbling away in incoherent pigeon English, made worse by her thick EE accent, the fact she is slightly crazy and seemed pissed. She also got rather aggressive, which I'll explain later.
Comms/location:The fact that her premises are in a road where there were no house numbers on the doors, coupled with her incoherence, meant there was the delay getting inside.
Her English is not great, so directions where painful. If she had shut up and listened when I said "So you live in the flats, then?" then it would have been a lot easier.
Her flat is walking distance from Albion Place car park. It is fine with good shower (which she told me was included in my time, of course).
Services:Olivia obviously has a very tired routine. She insisted on starting by giving me a lapdance fully clothed, which was pretty poor - an unsexy woman giving a very unsexy lapdance. She did eventually unleash her breasts for me to suck and in fairness she does have a nice, sizeable, rounded pair.
She kept stopping to swig a drink, which came from a Lucozade bottle though I wonder if, given her odd demeanour, she had been drinking.
Olivia said in advance that FK was at discretion and I should have walked but thought she would be better than the Romanians. Wrong. At least, if I booked a Romanian it would have cost me half the price for a pump and dump and I would have known what to expect and got what I paid for.
Of course, there was no real FK - her tongue brushed mine about twice and she recoiled. And when I went down on her, she kept moving her legs away and said she didn't really like RO.
FFS Even most Romanians take RO, no matter how many clients they've had.
Instead she offered to give me a blowjob (OWO) and in fairness this was quite good with some eye contact. There was also eye contact during sex but in cowgirl she got lazy (it's not as if I last long), sat up, so stifled my orgasm somewhat.
She then titled her head, looked at me in a maniacal way, gave peace V-signs with both hands and said "Happy Christmas"!
Fucking weird.
Finale:I usually ask an escort for a massage to at least get a bit more service after a quick pop, followed by a shower. However, given how the meeting had gone, I was in the mood to get out of there.
But not before I had given her some "firm advice", telling her she should be more honest and remove FK and RO from her profile if she didn't wish to offer them.
Olivia then got angry, insisted it was her body, services are at discretion blah, blah, and tried to blame me for being crap at kissing and RO.
Apparently, she has had no complaints in 3 years.
She then got up and came up close to me, pointing, shouting and telling me to get out etc. I sat down in silence, turned my back on her and put on my socks and shoes very slowly.
And then I left.
Conclusion:My confidence was low and criticising my sexual skills potentially would not have helped. However, fortunately, I have a thick skin, realise my skills aren't bad and that she was just making up an excuse for not offering proper FK or RO. (She couldn't know what I was like because she wouldn't indulge me.)
However, instead of being very annoyed at being ripped off at the end of a crap week in my life, having a pop at this scammer made me feel better - along with the knowledge that I would be writing a very negative review.
If this review stops 10 punters from wasting their hard-earned cash on this dreadful woman and terrible escort, then I'll be happy.
