Suki - posh totty - Portfolio Escorts - Outcall

[ferret1970]

External Link/Members Only

Outcall

£280 for two hours

Fancy a bit of posh totty? On my self-appointed mission to work my way through Portfolio's portfolio I decided to try Suki. Suki is slightly built, blond and public school educated. She also is a keen horse rider, or should I say she likes to ride. As with all Portfolio girls I've booked, Suki turned up bang on time and is very easy to talk to. Good company and not quite my image of a traditional escort. She is waif-like, slender, skinny or thin - take your pick. If you like a bit of meat on your girl Suki is not for you. Transaction sorted out we retired to my boudoir. Two hours of naked fun and before I knew it the adventure was over. Suki was good company and really seemed to enjoy her work. I would definitely like to see her again, she's intelligent, kinda cute and eager to please but not to everyone's taste.

[vw]

Naked fun ?  Wow that's informative   

Here is the review writing guide basic section, may help you

External Link/Members Only

[The Owl]

Naked fun ?  Wow that's informative   

Here is the review writing guide basic section, may help you

External Link/Members Only

I think you're being kind VW (are you feeling alright?)

This review seems more like a fake review by the agency pimp.

[Grumpy Pumpy]

Owl, I agree. This seems suspicious.

Ferret, you've done 9 reviews, all of agency girls. And very little meaningful content in any of them.

A better spread of reviews and more useful detail would make your reviews more useful and plausible

[notcalledchris]

Sorry mate but we need to know about the services you got. Did she kiss? Take it in the arse? Did she let you spunk in her face? Don't be shy. We need to know such things before booking her.

[vw]

I think you're being kind VW (are you feeling alright?)

This review seems more like a fake review by the agency pimp.

how do you find it OWL? yes reported it for the bin.

Expect Wanchor and Husqvarna360 will have a fit again. 

[Marmalade]

Glancing through the OP's reviews, does anyone else get the feeling he wants to be writing for Rabbit Reviews porn site or something similar? All these little jokes to make them 'interesting' but not really giving any information that wouldn't be on the agency website.

[vw]

and not a review anymore.   

[Hank Marvin]

Well if it is a fake review it is having the opposite effect on what was intended.

It is so bad that it cannot be made up, surely?

[vw]

Well if it is a fake review it is having the opposite effect on what was intended.

It is so bad that it cannot be made up, surely?

reported as a shit review and treated as such.

[Marmalade]

Well if it is a fake review it is having the opposite effect on what was intended.

It is so bad that it cannot be made up, surely?

You'd think saafe or someone would warn them not to try to post fake reviews on UKP. Always backfires on them.

I wonder when they will the prossies will think about posting gushingly positive reviews about other prossies, on the basis that they are often bitchy fuckers trying to discredit their competition, so maybe if they write a 'great' review for someone they hate they might think it will trigger the opposite effect. 

Fucking prossies. They might be thick but it doesn't stop them being bitchy and devious.

[vw]

You'd think saafe or someone would warn them not to try to post fake reviews on UKP. Always backfires on them.

I wonder when they will the prossies will think about posting gushingly positive reviews about other prossies, on the basis that they are often bitchy fuckers trying to discredit their competition, so maybe if they write a 'great' review for someone they hate they might think it will trigger the opposite effect. 

Fucking prossies. They might be thick but it doesn't stop them being bitchy and devious.

the agency has history marmalade, have been banned before for fake reviews and rumour has it a few members are in the pimps pocket.

Nothing to do with devious prossies just a devious pimp IMO.

Sure those that defend the agency like a blood relative will be along soon.      Yes the cry baby brothers.   

[Marmalade]

the agency has history marmalade, have been banned before for fake reviews and rumour has it a few members are in the pimps pocket.

I quite believe it. So stupid of the prossies to work for them in that case though, so 'much of a muchness'. 

[ferret1970]

Sorry to disappoint you all and put a stick in the spokes of your conspiracy theories but I am a genuine punter and the reviews I've penned are my honest opinion.I will concede that the last one for Suki wasn't the best and it was probably a mistake to have written it when I was frankly knackered after a long day at work.

I write about the agency girls because they are the only ones I see. Sorry about that but that's my preference. I am not in the pay of them or any other website. I don't write professionally but have a good job so quite frankly don't need to be in the thrall of anyone. That was the ninth review I've written and all of them apart from this one have been praised and received very positive comments. People seemed to like my lighthearted and conversational style of writing so I stuck with it. On that basis I was encouraged to write some more. Quite frankly this is the first time I've received criticism even though my other reviews have been read up to 1666 times without any negative comments. Strange, that.

I really like this website and I find it a great read. I also like to contribute but on this occasion wonder why I bothered.

I am somewhat baffled by your collective hostile and grumpy reaction given the good feedback I've received without exception so far. I enjoyed writing the reviews and seeing the comments and we all have off days so give me a break, eh?

Ferret

[Marmalade]

There's nothing personal in it mate, honestly. My observation is people aren't affected one way or the other by phrases like, oh-I'm-so-genuine. They simply read reviews and evaluate them on scales of probability based on seeing thousands of them. So if the review reads like a pimp or prossie review, the way most AW reviews read, agency website reviews read and other so-called punting sites reviews read, they'll say so.

People post a review and get flack. They either put some meat on the bone that convinces people they're a punter, or have a little mumsnet-type whine, or go in a huff and go why-bother, or else they listen and learn and grow. Right now you're a statistic, and so far not a very convincing one. What you do next is up to you.

Reviews here, unlike other sites, aren't censored to ensure they're prossie-friendly. There's no mods. You're just in here posting with the bigger lads. Sink or swim. 

[ferret1970]

Well, thanks for taking the time to reply, Marmalade. As I see it I've so far posted 9 reviews, 8 have been well received and one hasn't. I think I'm happy with that kind of strike rate. I'll carry on posting reviews until I get bored and whether people want to believe I'm a work of fiction or not is up to them - I know the truth and that's all that matters. I participate in this hobby because I enjoy it and I post because it's fun. I'll leave the willy-waving to the 'big boys'.

[vw]

Well, thanks for taking the time to reply, Marmalade. As I see it I've so far posted 9 reviews, 8 have been well received and one hasn't. I think I'm happy with that kind of strike rate. I'll carry on posting reviews until I get bored and whether people want to believe I'm a work of fiction or not is up to them - I know the truth and that's all that matters. I participate in this hobby because I enjoy it and I post because it's fun. I'll leave the willy-waving to the 'big boys'.

Well the rest are pretty bad too, maybe read the review writing guide.  External Link/Members Only

naked fun as the only service mention is no good for anyone.

[Marmalade]

Well, thanks for taking the time to reply, Marmalade. As I see it I've so far posted 9 reviews, 8 have been well received and one hasn't. I think I'm happy with that kind of strike rate. I'll carry on posting reviews until I get bored and whether people want to believe I'm a work of fiction or not is up to them - I know the truth and that's all that matters.

Your 'reviews' threads look to me like a running add for a couple of pimp outlets. 

I participate in this hobby because I enjoy it and I post because it's fun. I'll leave the willy-waving to the 'big boys'.

Clearly not to help other punters then. 

[Hank Marvin]

Well, thanks for taking the time to reply, Marmalade. As I see it I've so far posted 9 reviews, 8 have been well received and one hasn't. I think I'm happy with that kind of strike rate. I'll carry on posting reviews until I get bored and whether people want to believe I'm a work of fiction or not is up to them - I know the truth and that's all that matters. I participate in this hobby because I enjoy it and I post because it's fun. I'll leave the willy-waving to the 'big boys'.

My comment was that the review was too bad to be made up - I based this on there being no relevant content, which (I think) you have acknowledged. I wouldn't worry too much.

[Grumpy Pumpy]

Ferrett, as Marmalade says, criticiscism (some which came from me), is not personal 

It's up to you who you see, who you report on on how you phrase those reports. And it's up to us, individually, to decide what we take from each review

That said, most of like some detail and the suggestions on what to include are, I would contend, good ones.

[ferret1970]

I can take criticism and I will accept that last review wasn't the best. At the same time I'm not a professional writer and I do offer my time and effort without expectation of reward from anyone. I don't accept, though that the other reviews were just as poor. They all received positive and good feedback so I don't propose changing my style. Several guys have taken my reviews to heart and tried the girls out themselves which, I would have thought, was the point of this website. Different strokes for different folks and you can't please all of the people all of the time. I'm sure there's a place here for my style just as there is for the clinical dissection style that some of you seem to prefer.

[vw]

I can take criticism and I will accept that last review wasn't the best. At the same time I'm not a professional writer and I do offer my time and effort without expectation of reward from anyone. I don't accept, though that the other reviews were just as poor. They all received positive and good feedback so I don't propose changing my style. Several guys have taken my reviews to heart and tried the girls out themselves which, I would have thought, was the point of this website. Different strokes for different folks and you can't please all of the people all of the time. I'm sure there's a place here for my style just as there is for the clinical dissection style that some of you seem to prefer.

Just go by the review writing guide.

External Link/Members Only

Is simple include requited info, which this one didn't, like services.

the ego massaging novels are not required to, just a list of services and a short comment on them, like style of kissing or depth of oral.

If your not sure ask.   

[Marmalade]

I'm not a professional writer and I do offer my time and effort without expectation of reward from anyone.

It's fuck all to do with that tbh. Anyone that can type, even if they can't spell, is capable of saying whether a blow job was any good whether he cunt smelt of fish or whether you had several positions. It's a punting site. Did you just book her to have an 'intelligent chat' (speaks English does she?) in her 'boudoir' (whatever the fuck that is). She's a PROSTITUTE you big pansy. You paid her for sex. How was the sex??

If you are "too much of a gentleman to say" then you might be better sticking to AW rather than UKP.

[ferret1970]

She's a PROSTITUTE you big pansy.

Such anger. I thought marmalade was a sweet preserve but you’re bitter and sour. Perhaps you should change your name to Lemon.
I’ve been a member of this site since January, conversed pleasantly with other members about a mutually shared interest until now. I’ve written reviews, thousands have viewed them and, accepting the principle of  qui tacet consentire videtur, have enjoyed them. Indeed, many have said that they’ve enjoyed my reviews. Check it yourself if you don’t believe me.
So tell me, are you the owner of this site? If so ban me and remove my irritating presence. If you do so I would first ask you this – why are you so annoyed by me when there’s plenty of other no-better written reviews on the forum? You’d ban me or flame me for writing a bad review? Isn’t that a bit extreme?
If you’re not the owner are you a moderator? No, hang on a minute, I recall that this site is unmoderated.
That means that you’re just another member offering an opinion. And opinions are like assholes – everyone has one.
But why so angry? Perhaps your unresolved anger management issues are because you haven’t emptied your sacks for a while. Tell you what, send me your bank details and I’ll put thirty quid into your account and you can go and get a blowjob off some dead-eyed street-walker. If you do you can write it up in a review. Here’s some guidelines to help you:
External Link/Members Only
But note that they are guidelines and not rules. Have a nice life.
Ferret

[Marmalade]

Such anger.

Rock on you sad git.  I do really and genuinely find 'people' like your dear sweet fluffy self amusing actually. I certainly couldn't be bothered getting angry with you. Still, stick around long enough, someone will.   

[charlie-mott]

The site is not unmoderated, it is self moderated by all members questioning things that stand out. This may be a half assed review, if so move on and hopefully the next one will be better received; or it may be another fake advert for a whore with a dusty phone... We test these suspect reviews by questioning the author. If you have nothing to hide, then you have nothing to worry about, but it is something that you need to accept as part of the forum quality control.