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From a few months ago. One of the bank holidays so I could park OK, not sure if it was Easter or May.
This Girl is well reviewed on here so I could live in fear of her many followers but even so this is a true account of what happened. For me at least. It will be shorter than my usual reviews.
It started as: I decided to treat myself to, supposedly, a guaranteed great experience with one of the well-respected UKP escorts. Maria lists CIM and facials so the thought of splooging the muck over a pretty Brazilian woman's face did have its' appeal.
The location: Central London, nice road, nice flat (when I eventually found it). I think this may have started the punt off badly. She sent me the postcode and, as usual, was going to send me the number when I arrived.
What happened was: with the given postcode I was at the other end of the street. For some reason I couldn't find her flat, which was located at basement level. I also almost got the wrong flat as there were 2 gates and she was being really a pain about where the entrance was. maybe I wasn't understanding her.
When I found her entrance (so to speak) she opened the door and looked like she really had the hump. In fact combined with how she was addressing me (like I'm an annoying prick or something) and her looks, which frankly took me aback, based on "how beautiful" she supposedly is, I nearly walked.#
Appearance: body was fairly hot but her face. I didn't find her attractive at all. Although her face is shown on her profile I think I expected a pretty girl, rather than the heavy featured average looker that stood in front of me. It may have helped if she smiled. She just looked miserable. I always give the money up front. Well she took that quickly enough and walked off to stash it somewhere.
Not only that she carried on with the attitude. It was as if she wanted to "tut" at everything I said or did.
Well, as documented on here enough, I usually just go for a BJ and this was looking expensive for such an experience.
I told her what she wanted. She tried sitting on the bed and leaning forward which is a shit way to give a BJ. She reluctantly agreed to get on her knees by the mirror.
The BJ was average. I took longer than usual to get hard anyway due to the fact I was being blown by a girl which was nothing like as attractive as my expectations.
I thought of another girl while "Average or less Maria" carried on so I was kind of getting close. Told her I wanted to give her a facial. She said "no". So I said I wanted to cum in her mouth. She looked reluctant at that prospect too but carried on sucking.
For how enjoyable this was I wish I had bought a cod from a fish monger and wrapped its' lips around my dick so I started wanking to get this ordeal over with.
Maria started half covering her face, eyes, whatever. I don't know what an "escort who lists facials and CIM in her 'likes'" thought she was going to get hit by. She also was trying to hold her hair in a really annoying way which made her look less attractive. If that is possible.
Started cumming. Half had to force it into her mouth. She took some of the muck and got up straight away to disappear into the bathroom. I hadn't even finished cumming and stopped halfway which is a painful and unpleasant experience.
I just got dressed as quickly as I could and got out. Shit experience.
The whole thing was absolute shit. One of my worst punts ever. Beaten by "Paris" (see my other reviews) who was even worse but, my God, this really was a waste of money. It was altogether a crap experience and I lost my will to punt temporarily.
Sorry fans of Maria. She's an average looking girl who I wouldn't look at in the street. Why the fuck I don't walk in these situations I'll never know. I honestly would have had more pleasure taking £100 out of my wallet and throwing it in the bin or burning it. I actually think I didn't post before because I was so annoyed at myself. Her recent neg review kind of woke me up.
