So, contemplating paying £200 for a 26 year old 5’7” size 8 EE blonde with silicon 34C bolt ons and what looks like a potential trout mouth who looks absolutely fucking awesome in the photos was a risk, right? Well, those photos enticed me like a mermaid to a pirate to the extent that I could smell her hair, feel the curve of her smooth arse and see her eyes looking up at me as she licked my shaft, to my punter’s mind she was worth the risk.
External Link/Members Only Booking: Easy, texts, checked availability, confirmed services as advertised: DFK, OWO, DT, GFE, 69, CIF, CIM, COB, address delivered in a few minutes.
Location: Reasonable sized yet basic two floored apartment is a posh square on the north side of Knightsbridge close to Harrods. Good sized bedroom with en suite bathroom and non working shower, lucky I arrived in pristine condition.
The girl: My fears smashed into my brain as I walked to the apartment, devil punter on my left shoulder was screaming “she’ll be 36 with a bad lip job, droopy tits, wrinkled skin and a shit attitude while angel punter on the right side was wanking furiously imagining her exactly like the photos from the two grand shoot.
She opened the door and she was exactly as the pictures and description on the website, stunning, like a really hot lap dancer who came back for extras…. except she had mad made fuck all effort, no attempt at mood lighting, no candles, just a harsh ceiling light and tropical temperature. She greeted me lukewarmly with a peck on the cheek, barefoot, no makeup, in grey cotton Calvin Klein bra and skimpy knickers, the pink fluffy slippers on the floor belying the fact that she’d not been up long.
But my oh my that body, golden tan, no tats, shaped like a porn star but her attitude was brisk and businesslike, this was a first for me, body for Baywatch, attitude for Crimewatch.
She’s Greek, looked spectacular and my little brain pushed my body forward for a grope. She asked if I wanted any extras, I said on top of £200? She said, yes cim and French kissing £50 each, I said you are kidding, she snarled and went to stash the cash.
She came back promptly and took off her bra and pants, no slow sensual undressing, naked she is beyond spectacular, she undid a few of my shirt buttons lazily and groped my bulge, then said, you can do that and sat on the bed, watching as I finished undressing. So much blood had rushed to my hard on that I felt dizzy.
I joined her on the bed and kissed shallowly, she sucked my throbbing cock, or at least the first few inches of it with fast staccato movements, I asked her to lick the shaft and balls, she did, reluctantly for a couple of minutes then asked what position as she languidly rolled on a condom. I said cowgirl, she asked if I was lazy and I said no, I want to watch you work on top of me.
She applied a little lube and lowered herself, grimacing like I was inserting a Burmese python into her. She thrust down unconvincingly as I thrust up until I got a rhythm going and it felt tight and oh so good, despite her attitude, I smashed away until I groaned, nutted in the sac and kept pumping. She immediately jumped off and asked why I carried on fucking after I’d cum, I said because I was squeezing out the max from my orgasm, she removed the nodder with a pile of tissues and a contemptuous look, scrubbed down my cock with baby wipes and took the pile of rubbish to a Sainsbury’s bag masquerading as the bin at the other side of the room.
That body as she sashayed across the carpet got me hard again and she came back to the bed with raised eyebrows saying you want to go again? I said yes, at least once more, she said two times maximum in an hour, most men only go once. We chatted a while, she is smart but 100% business focused and cold as a witches tit.
I said blow me in front of the mirror, she said I’m not getting on my knees, I’ll stay on the bed, so we maneuvered, I got her to suck me off sideways at first, then between my legs as I lay on the bed and watched that awesome body go to work from the front and back, she strained to get more than a few inches in, as if I were thicker than the entire cast of TOWIE, then I stood and she sucked like a demon, knowing I was close until the most niggardly cim of my puntimg career.
As I started spaffing she kind of clamped her lips together and closed her jaw while recoiling leaving only the tip of the head between her pumped up lips as I blasted out a spunk induced teeth whitening.
The eyebrows were up again as she ran off to the bathroom to spit more forcibly than a stand load of Millwall fans when Leeds are in town. She returned, asked why I kept going when I was cumming, I said that’s how a man derives maximum pleasure, she sighed, stayed naked and we had a surprisingly friendly chat about whoring as I had a piss, cleaned my nads in the sink, dried off and dressed.
I left feeling the full force of self loathing and futility that hits you hard in the bollocks after a crap punt. I texted my displeasure to the agency, no response, no surprise, they are just a marketing tool with no real knowledge of the girls and no interest in anything other than their commission.
Recommend, no chance, she’s off home soon, don’t waste your time fellas.
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