Safe to say that with the exception of the odd disastrous meet prior to me finding UKP I can safely say that Keri (or whatever name she goes by this week) can now hold the mantle for the unsatisfactory meet I've EVER had with an British girl. I understand that Keri keeps changing her name and has had to set up new Adultwork accounts because of bad reviews she gets on Adultwork, claiming another working girl is sabotaging her reputation. Well Keri I'm not a working girl, and would much prefer to be posting a positive review about an enjoyable and satisfactory meet that I had with you but I can't. I'm not going to give a negative review on Adultwork which will be lost the next time you have to change your profile, no I'm posting on UKP so that the review will at least be retained as testament to an inadequate service and a 'don't do that attitude' that you seem to adopt once you had the paperwork out the way. All I can say is you must be totally different with other gents if you are getting positive reviews from them.
On holiday and left things a bit late in the day to make my usual foray up the motorway to Tyneside I thought I'd try someone more local. Had seen Keri's profile for sometime dating back to Kimberly Klark days of a couple of years back but had also seen some positive words being spoken about her more recently. So text to see if she might be free and got a reply almost immediately and a booking was arranged for 50 minutes later at her home and I indicated what I would like her to wear. Now I have to drive to the east side of Middlesbrough and she knows from where I'm driving, so eight texts in the next 50 mins wasn't appreciated, but maybe showed an element of desperation on her part, I don't know?. Parked up and walked a short distance to the house where I phoned but she was ready and beckoned me in, she wasn't though dressed as I had requested saying the outfit had been used twice that day and was in the wash, nice to know. She still looked quite tidy in her shorts and her photos on AW are of her. She offered me a drink and wanted the paperwork sorted downstairs in the lounge, some girls are much more trusting but maybe she's had guys walk out on her in the past.
Personality: Friendly and reasonably chatty, full of busy, not shy
Appearance: Shoulder length blonde hair, Blue eyes, Dress size 10, Breast size about 34a, Height about 5ft 2" slim and toned
Services: DFK, Oral (owo) & Reverse, Sex (protected), Hand Relief
External Link/Members OnlyOnce in the bedroom the first thing that struck me was the size of the room, there was next to no gap on either side of the bed and any movement along the side of the bed had to be sideways, the downstairs lounge would have been more appropriate. There was also a foot board so you either slid along one side onto the bed or hurdle the foot board. I now asked if there was anything 'off limits' yes anal was the reply for £20 extra, but everything else you would assume is on offer after that reply. So we started with some kissing, nice it was with tongues, but she seemed in a hurry to get on with things. She was stripping rather than let me undress her although her pressing her backside into my groin area was arousing. I did take off her bra to find a small pair of breasts and began to lick and suck on her nipples only to be told 'that doesn't really do anything for me'. She was keen to get me laid on the bed telling me where I should lay but I was wanting to explore her body, in the end she said she would give me oral but I would have to stand against the wall in a squat position, reasonably nice but just moving your head from one side to the other doesn't constitute a blow job. I do a fair bit of sport but after a couple of minutes the thigh muscles begin to ache squatting against the bedroom wall.
So we moved onto the bed, well manoeuvred and she got me into the position she wanted, apparently oral she normally gives standing up at the end of the bed bending over the foot board, not what I was wanting. So I decided to go down on her, STOP 'I don't take my pants off as I have a cesarean scar', 'what'I thought as this meet is now rapidly going down hill. I briefly gave her oral by pulling her pants to one side but this wasn't particularly enjoyable. So she jumps off the bed to get a condom, but I ask for a bit more oral that she gives standing at the foot of the bed my legs hanging over this foot board, not very comfortable. On with the condom that she partly does with her mouth, that's quite nice, then she says she's going to keep hold of the rubber during sex. I'm appalled at this suggestion but think just let's get on with this. Well guys if ever you've tried having sex with a lass still wearing her pants, whose holding onto your cock and is therefore determining how deep you can go, you'll know exactly what I'm talking about. This was "the ultimate turn off". She then says that there is no point trying anything else as there isn't time, it's off with the rubber and we attempt to make me come but the scenario had ruined any such chance. So somewhat annoyed and disappointed we start getting dressed, she asks me my AW name and then says that's not one of the names She's been warned off about (why ask at the end and not the start).
Conversation continues and I mention about my posting reviews on AW and UKP in the past, well guys if your reading this your wasting your time as Keri thinks UKP is crap and is 'dead' and we should all be on UKE. Nice to know, but as a punter I'll continue posting my reviews here on UKP be they good, bad or indifferent.
Do I need to sum up this meet, eight texts in 50 mins when surely she knows I'm driving, not dressed the way I had requested, paperwork up front, ONLY anal off limits but then doesn't want her tits sucked, keeps her pants on throughout, wants to deliver oral from the end of the bed, and wants to hold onto the condom throughout sex 'what a turn off'. The bedroom isn't adequate space wise until you are both on the bed and then she blamed me for throwing her off her normal routine, apparently she likes to do a toy show and she has you in a particular position on the bed but I wasn't visiting her for a predetermined show, this implied that she has some sort of process she follows which is more a mechanical delivery of her service and lacks any spontaneity, she claims she couldn't manage being thrown out her routine. Then of course having read that she's not a clock watcher I find that having rung her as I walked to the house I find myself back in my car just 26 mins after my telephone call.
Sorry Keri, but I think a negative is totally justified and despite your claims about bad reviews being posted by another WG I can only speak as I found and our meet without any hesitation in my mind was the poorest meet I've ever had with any girl on AW or through any Agency (the no off limits but I don't do ... is particularly annoying) and as such I think it only fair to alert my fellow punters of the poor service you provided.
