Zoie by massage (Can't speak or understand English and bad habbits)

[Doiry]

External Link/Members Only or External Link/Members Only

After a posting by another reviewer, I saw this woman today. There is a post on AW which says the maid on the phone is very rude. That's no maid, that's Zoie. 

The property is between Lancaster Gate and Bayswater at the end of a longish road a very large house with ornate plasterwork on the ceilings and on the stairway. The property is very busy with multiple people making calls in the hallway and corridors as I noted on leaving. This is clearly being used as accommodation for homeless/vulnerable people. Now that I know this, I wouldn't be going back aside from what I have said below. 

The 'flat' is tiny. You can stretch your arms out and almost touch both sides of the room. The bedroom is a mezzanine level with a mattress on the floor (no bed). You have to scale an almost vertical 8 foot stairway to get to the bedroom. 

I phoned before hand, and apart from saying coming twice was allowed, she hung up and texted me the road/post code. On arrival I got the door number by phoning back.

She also looks a lot of years older than her pictures on AW. I would guess late 40s or early 50s. Ok boobs though and a good body (for her age).  But I couldn't look at her face, as she really is very very old looking 

When on the 'bed' I requested that she massage a part of my back that was causing me grief. She couldn't understand a word of it. She didn't know what a thigh is, nor a calf. The massage being a total waste of time, I asked for hand relief. She immediately put my dick in her gob for OWO 

I didn't ask for it and didn't want it. I am always 100% safe, and no way did I want this. I asked her to stop. She didn't understand and changed positions instead. I had to say loudly several times, no stop! no don't do that, stop!  I got dressed and left. No word was exchanged (waste of time, she wouldn't have understood anyway) 

Will have to go for a check now. Very angry and annoyed and will not return ever   

[NervousEnergy]

Sorry you had such a bad time Sounds like a possibile B&S... Someone else has described her as being around 30... Whereas you say she looked 40-50. Any thoughts?

[Doiry]

Yeah, the previous review was BS! On the strength of that previous review I wasted £60 for less than 30 mins for a piss poor massage with a woman who couldn't utter a word of English, and now have to book an appointment at the clinic. The previous reviewer says she spoke English. Other than take off your clothes I can't imagine what they must have discussed, as I saw the girl in the AW photo. Maybe he saw someone else, but then he should have mentioned B&S in his review so it must have been the same woman, just much much older.  I have no idea what his motives were for posting lying crap.

She looks way way older in person than in the photos. They are her 10 years younger for sure. I'm in my early 30s, and this woman looked like my aunt (who is older than my dad). She is wrinkly, but has boobs of a woman late 30s I would say, and she has a semi toned body. Maybe it's her age but her jawline looked masculine and I couldn't look at her face at all, just her boobs and pussy, but don't think you will be impressed by them, its just they were way way better than the face. 

[HighlyMotivated]

She's not my cup of tea personally, but just because another punter (who is more reputable than you) found her attractive and got a good service out of her doesn't mean it's "lying crap"

As for her lack of English. Well, it's not nice to say but the truth is some prossies magically lose the ability to speak English depending on the client. That's a poor reflection on the prossie, not the punter who told you she held a conversation with him

This whole housing homeless stuff is a bizarre claim, maybe someone else who's been can chime in

Good luck at the clinic, though I'm sure you have nothing to worry about. You had a poor punt and that's on her so she deserves the Negative. Good lluck on your next punt!

[SamLP]

IMO, the OP expected something different and has come here venting. He's also managed to call my review a load of BS, and commented on it with a load of bollocks, as well as the other reviewer. IMO, he's not credible, and constantly claims in his reviews that he was angry which explains why he's hell bent on rubbishing other reviews because he expected something different. From the description this isn't a B&S, but for dramatic effect, he wants to make a point by saying she looks to be in her 50's. That's why I find his credibility to be lacking because it's easy to slag off other girls and punters on the internet, lie & exaggerate which is what the OP has done.

[SamLP]

She's not my cup of tea personally, but just because another punter (who is more reputable than you) found her attractive and got a good service out of her doesn't mean it's "lying crap"

Tbh, I never mentioned anything about her facial looks. She's not my cup of tea either but her attitude and service was good.
As for Bassman's review, he also said she isn't a stunner but he found her somewhat attractive.
She has face pictures in her profile which are accurate, so if the OP had higher standards then he let himself down by booking her.

[rockharders]

When on the 'bed' I requested that she massage a part of my back that was causing me grief. She couldn't understand a word of it. She didn't know what a thigh is, nor a calf. The massage being a total waste of time, I asked for hand relief. She immediately put my dick in her gob for OWO 

I didn't ask for it and didn't want it. I am always 100% safe, and no way did I want this. I asked her to stop. She didn't understand and changed positions instead. I had to say loudly several times, no stop! no don't do that, stop!  I got dressed and left. No word was exchanged (waste of time, she wouldn't have understood anyway) 

Will have to go for a check now. Very angry and annoyed and will not return ever   

I disagree with this and will write up my review soon. Your experience was nothing like mine. I call bullshit on you. I'll tell you why.

I met Zoie just a couple of days ago and we spoke in English fine. Sure it's not great but good enough to get by and have a conversation. She understood all my instructions perfectly. I asked for covered oral, I got it. I asked for massage, doggy, cowgirl, no problems, all understood. The HJ was excellent.

Your insistence she didn't understand a word of English is a blatant lie. Your review and credibility is worthless.

[bestbefore]

All the OP's previous reviews have been negative, so he obviously hasnt been doing his homework thoroughly on this forum. Or he has very different expectations from a punt from the rest of mankind

[punk]

External Link/Members Only or External Link/Members Only

After a posting by another reviewer, I saw this woman today. There is a post on AW which says the maid on the phone is very rude. That's no maid, that's Zoie. 

The property is between Lancaster Gate and Bayswater at the end of a longish road a very large house with ornate plasterwork on the ceilings and on the stairway. The property is very busy with multiple people making calls in the hallway and corridors as I noted on leaving. This is clearly being used as accommodation for homeless/vulnerable people. Now that I know this, I wouldn't be going back aside from what I have said below. 

The 'flat' is tiny. You can stretch your arms out and almost touch both sides of the room. The bedroom is a mezzanine level with a mattress on the floor (no bed). You have to scale an almost vertical 8 foot stairway to get to the bedroom. 

I phoned before hand, and apart from saying coming twice was allowed, she hung up and texted me the road/post code. On arrival I got the door number by phoning back.

She also looks a lot of years older than her pictures on AW. I would guess late 40s or early 50s. Ok boobs though and a good body (for her age).  But I couldn't look at her face, as she really is very very old looking 

When on the 'bed' I requested that she massage a part of my back that was causing me grief. She couldn't understand a word of it. She didn't know what a thigh is, nor a calf. The massage being a total waste of time, I asked for hand relief. She immediately put my dick in her gob for OWO 

I didn't ask for it and didn't want it. I am always 100% safe, and no way did I want this. I asked her to stop. She didn't understand and changed positions instead. I had to say loudly several times, no stop! no don't do that, stop!  I got dressed and left. No word was exchanged (waste of time, she wouldn't have understood anyway) 

Will have to go for a check now. Very angry and annoyed and will not return ever   

This is Bollocks.

[FlyingBreadMan]

External Link/Members Only or External Link/Members Only

After a posting by another reviewer, I saw this woman today. There is a post on AW which says the maid on the phone is very rude. That's no maid, that's Zoie. 

The property is between Lancaster Gate and Bayswater at the end of a longish road a very large house with ornate plasterwork on the ceilings and on the stairway. The property is very busy with multiple people making calls in the hallway and corridors as I noted on leaving. This is clearly being used as accommodation for homeless/vulnerable people. Now that I know this, I wouldn't be going back aside from what I have said below. 

The 'flat' is tiny. You can stretch your arms out and almost touch both sides of the room. The bedroom is a mezzanine level with a mattress on the floor (no bed). You have to scale an almost vertical 8 foot stairway to get to the bedroom. 

I phoned before hand, and apart from saying coming twice was allowed, she hung up and texted me the road/post code. On arrival I got the door number by phoning back.

She also looks a lot of years older than her pictures on AW. I would guess late 40s or early 50s. Ok boobs though and a good body (for her age).  But I couldn't look at her face, as she really is very very old looking 

When on the 'bed' I requested that she massage a part of my back that was causing me grief. She couldn't understand a word of it. She didn't know what a thigh is, nor a calf. The massage being a total waste of time, I asked for hand relief. She immediately put my dick in her gob for OWO 

I didn't ask for it and didn't want it. I am always 100% safe, and no way did I want this. I asked her to stop. She didn't understand and changed positions instead. I had to say loudly several times, no stop! no don't do that, stop!  I got dressed and left. No word was exchanged (waste of time, she wouldn't have understood anyway) 

Will have to go for a check now. Very angry and annoyed and will not return ever   

Bad day visiting your granny?

[pewpewpew]

I had to say loudly several times, no stop! no don't do that, stop!

Missing some quotation marks there sir. Maybe it is YOU who doesn't understand English

[235711prime]

All the OP's previous reviews have been negative, so he obviously hasnt been doing his homework thoroughly on this forum. Or he has very different expectations from a punt from the rest of mankind

+1

4 reviews and 4 negatives!

Either the OP has been unlucky or he's after something else!

[Belgarion]

Yeah, the previous review was BS! On the strength of that previous review I wasted £60 for less than 30 mins for a piss poor massage with a woman who couldn't utter a word of English, and now have to book an appointment at the clinic. The previous reviewer says she spoke English. Other than take off your clothes I can't imagine what they must have discussed, as I saw the girl in the AW photo. Maybe he saw someone else, but then he should have mentioned B&S in his review so it must have been the same woman, just much much older.  I have no idea what his motives were for posting lying crap.

She looks way way older in person than in the photos. They are her 10 years younger for sure. I'm in my early 30s, and this woman looked like my aunt (who is older than my dad). She is wrinkly, but has boobs of a woman late 30s I would say, and she has a semi toned body. Maybe it's her age but her jawline looked masculine and I couldn't look at her face at all, just her boobs and pussy, but don't think you will be impressed by them, its just they were way way better than the face. 

Yeah, take your POV over SamLPs, like that's going to happen

 

If you wanted just a massage and nothing else, why did you not go and see a professional massage therapist or an osteopath. For £60 you would have addressed that issue.

This review reeks of BS

[nickleupip]

I am a bit confused... This OP has to have himself checked because he received a 1 second  OWO? (which I assume is the time it lasted if he stopped her)

Where does the balance stand on accepted risk percentage in this sport that we all love? What are the benefits on receiving OW?

[Doiry]

Hey, Sam brought out his fellow trolls. Go back under your bridges.

I posted to save others from experiencing the hell I did. You weren't there, I was. Being a troll makes you all look stupid. Sam who is the only other reviewer (and by all accounts would stick his dick in a anything still warm) is a windbag. 100 odd reviews, but 2,000+ posts. So much to say, yet such little wisdom. Then there are the tossers (literally) who say they have seen her and will do a review, but haven't? What are you waiting for, Christmas. That's BS too! In fact if you look at all the posters here, criticising my review, they all post 10 times more than they review! Wankers with too much to say, and too little experience!

For some treason they have the time to post shite, but can't post a review. To anyone who has seen her, or is thinking of seeing her, search her address. Oh look, its a charity hostel for the homeless!

Yes I have posted only negative reviews. What, are you suggesting they should have been positive? Can you not read! Posting BS to a forum that's supposed to enlighten seems to have escaped you all. What with emotional fuckwits and tossers who would shag a goat of if bleated at them!

To anyone tempted to see her. Read what I have written, make up your own mind. Don't let wankers who hate women for not touching their naughty areas in real life make up your mind for you!

[The_Don]

Banning reason: Arrogant little shit

Thank you Admin

[punk]

Thank you Admin

 

[SamLP]

What an arrogant little shit
Oh wait... snap

Stupid shit missed out the fact I went to see her based on bassman's review which is linked, and his review was accurate as I found out.

[NervousEnergy]

This guy is slanderous

What with emotional fuckwits and tossers who would shag a goat of if bleated at them!

This simply isn't true. Said goat would have to buy me a drink first, on top of the bleating.