Sisi_Massage_Me - Great Portland Street

[hogcatcher]

Stupidly didn't check UKP before meeting this one - I probably had in the past but slipped my mind and didn't have her on my blacklist.

My plan A didnt work out so I thought I'd get a massage with a happy ending, maybe also get manscaped for an extra £10.

External Link/Members Only or External Link/Members Only

Price
£40 for 30 minute massage plus an extra £20 for her to be naked

Booking
Meet happened around Christmas - Called the number on her profile which went to VM and received a text back straight away with a menu. Requested a 30 min massage with manscaping - total was given along with the postcode and time - booking was very easy but then it went downhill from here - she also said I had to be on time as she had another booking straight after.

Location
Around a 4 min walk from Great Portland Street just off the Euston Road - the flat itself was pretty large but also very cold and smelly.

The Girl
Shes Chinese and in her mid to high 50s - she lied and said she was 30!! Decent size tits but her nipples were HUGE and staring at me. Flat ass too. She wore some track pants and a jumper - gave me a menu as soon as I walked in and her English is VERY limited. Not sure how good her English is but she didnt say much through the whole meet - except how she liked my shoes?!

The Session
Pointed on the menu I wanted a 30 min massage with a happy ending - also manscaping - it was all confirmed over text so wasnt sure why she asked. She then gestured she couldnt do the manscaping which left me disappointed but also confused - then made me think it wasn't her texting me back.

I proceeded to make payment and she told me to get undressed while she disappeared for some reason - she seemed very rushed and was walking around like she was on a mission. I lay down on the massage bed and she instantly grabbed my cock and started wanking me off while I was still flaccid - I specifically asked for a happy ENDING and when I brought this up, she said yes yes and carried on. She then proceeded to lift up her top and pull down her pants to around knee length - assuming this was her version of "nude". I wasnt working for me so she started playing with my nipples and rubbed her body up against me for a while. I closed my eyes as it was the best thing to do which barely got me hard - she also thought blowing on my cock would help - around 3 mins later with some bad technique she asked "you no cum?" to which I responded "no". That was the the most conversation I had with her.

She disappeared for another 5 mins then proceeded to come back in the room with ICE COLD hands and started "massaging" my body - no oils so it was pretty uncomfortable - I asked for oils and she just said "yes" but then proceeded to rub me down without any - she then started punching my legs?! At this point I just wanted to get out of there so around 20 mins in, I got up mid massage and said thanks - it was pointless speaking to her because she didn't really understand or want to understand me.

Leaving 5 mins before my time was up I was greeted by another guy standing outside the apartment on his phone looking around - this was definately her next punter and I was tempted to save him and mention how bad things were LOL. For obvious reasons, I gave him a head nod and went on my way aching for a plan C without any luck!!

As mentioned, I didnt check UKP but she had around 450 positive reviews on her AW profile

My experience was quite similar to TheOtherChurchill but glad I didn't spend as much as he did!! I was £60 out of pocket with blue balls.

Overall 0/10.

[sparkus]

I was very lucky in that I couldn't find her gaff so she had to come out into the street to show me - was a boiling hot day so she was just in shorts, flipflops and bra-less vest. Turned and fled.