Relax Life Massage by 'Happy' - Kew

[Moneyd]

External Link/Members Only

Wen't to see an Asian chick called 'Happy' at this place after a recent review.

Been to the place once before last summer (didn't review and pretty sure the girl I had isn't there anymore) and it was an ok experience.

Happy is probably in her 40s (MAYBE late 30s), she told me she was 23 and it I'm very impressed with myself for not laughing out loud when she said so.

The massage was ok, but just ok. Loads of oil, far too much oil. That place must have a massive oil bill every month if she's using that much on her punters. She was very chatty which I usually don't mind. But she would not shut the fuck up. Kept telling me how handsome I was, telling me she wanted a boyfriend, asking about my love life. Asked me numerous times if I was married, if I owned a house, what job I did, how much money I have. I'm not stupid, I tried to swerve most questions and mot let on that I had money.

She kept asking me if I thought she looked 23 and if I thought she had a beautiful body. It was really getting annoying, I was so happy that I only booked 30 minutes (£30).

Anyway, we got down to extras. She wanted £20 for HR and £50 for topless. I said I would pay £30 for topless and she said no. We weren't getting anywhere so I just said leave it. She was getting on my nerves and I was really to just walk and have a wank in the shower. But eventually she caved for £30.

This was a waste of time, her "beautiful body" that she kept describing was probably beautiful about 15 years ago. Her tits were awful, I ended up having to finish myself off too as her HJ technic was all over the place. At one point I thought we was going to snap my cock off.

After everything was over I had a shower and couldn't leave quick enough. The owner asked if I had a good time and if they'd see me again too. I said maybe, if there is another girl available and left.

I think I'll be avoiding this place from now on.

Avoid like the plague in my opinion.

[LLPunting]

Thanks for the warning 

Any distinguishing marks, tattoos, piercings, scars, deformities to identify this probably many-monikered disaster that's prowling multiple joints?

GL with the next place. 

[Davebizz]

External Link/Members Only

Wen't to see an Asian chick called 'Happy' at this place after a recent review.

Been to the place once before last summer (didn't review and pretty sure the girl I had isn't there anymore) and it was an ok experience.

Happy is probably in her 40s (MAYBE late 30s), she told me she was 23 and it I'm very impressed with myself for not laughing out loud when she said so.

The massage was ok, but just ok. Loads of oil, far too much oil. That place must have a massive oil bill every month if she's using that much on her punters. She was very chatty which I usually don't mind. But she would not shut the fuck up. Kept telling me how handsome I was, telling me she wanted a boyfriend, asking about my love life. Asked me numerous times if I was married, if I owned a house, what job I did, how much money I have. I'm not stupid, I tried to swerve most questions and mot let on that I had money.

She kept asking me if I thought she looked 23 and if I thought she had a beautiful body. It was really getting annoying, I was so happy that I only booked 30 minutes (£30).

Anyway, we got down to extras. She wanted £20 for HR and £50 for topless. I said I would pay £30 for topless and she said no. We weren't getting anywhere so I just said leave it. She was getting on my nerves and I was really to just walk and have a wank in the shower. But eventually she caved for £30.

This was a waste of time, her "beautiful body" that she kept describing was probably beautiful about 15 years ago. Her tits were awful, I ended up having to finish myself off too as her HJ technic was all over the place. At one point I thought we was going to snap my cock off.

After everything was over I had a shower and couldn't leave quick enough. The owner asked if I had a good time and if they'd see me again too. I said maybe, if there is another girl available and left.

I think I'll be avoiding this place from now on.

Avoid like the plague in my opinion.

Sorry you had a bad experience. The post you saw might have been mine? She definitly didnt look 40's but she was wearing a face mask. she was maybe about 5'2-5'4. possibly we saw different people i dont know.

When you were leaving and the owner asked you how it was, did she have huge tits and a mole near her mouth? she might have been the same lady who asked me as well i was leaving. might try and book her. do you know her name? ill review after on here