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1 hour "sensual massage" incall, £80
Communication: by voice and text. Efficient, if impersonal. Leena does her own 'phone calls.
Location: apartment (shared) in a converted terraced house in Old Town, Swindon.
No on-street parking immediately outside. Pay-and-display nearby.
Inside, apartment might be used by more than one girl; not sure. Workroom fairly tidy and reasonably clean. Bed firm-ish.
Accessibility: challenging. If you're in a chair, change that to "hopeless" and don't even try.
Steep steps and trip-hazards aplenty from pavement to main front door. Indoors, up three flights of stairs that aren't easy even for the able-bodied. Didn't see a lift: it's possible that there was one hidden behind a locked wooden door (of which there were several).
AppearanceShort and on the chunky side. Her face was okay in an Easter Island sort of way, especially as it was almost entirely immobile throughout the punt. Perhaps she CAN smile, but doesn't except as yet another chargeable extra.
Tits might have been good, but I couldn't tell, because they were visible only through a partially-see-through garment and I refused to pay TEN POUNDS EXTRA just to see her nipples clearly.
Age: early thirties at a guess; faintly possible that the claimed twenty-seven is accurate.
Long dark hair (on her head, silly) does look good, but that's the only "appearance" plus point that I can remember.
PersonalityApparently not.
Services agreed and deliveredMassage, HR
Services NOT offered or givenNo nudity (I was naked, but she wasn't). No CIM, OWO or OW, fair enough because none expected. No kissing, which was a bit mean. No B2B. No M-F touching of any kind, which was VERY mean. No cc-swipes, no spontaneous F-M touching of naughty bits, and none at all unless you demand it at the time. No indication of emotional involvement, fake or genuine. No talking. No smiling. No, really.
Delivery of services that WERE agreedLeena gives a reasonable Thai-style massage, though she wasn't anywhere near as good at it as she seemed to think she was. I was happy to let her spend up to twenty minutes or so playing proper masseuse, because one of the things I wanted from this punt was some proper Thai massage. But not a whole punt spent on it. I'd booked a "sensual massage" with Leena and I was determined to get the sensual bit as well as the massage bit.
As we neared twenty-five minutes in, I interrupted her obviously gearing up to have a fourth go on the same shoulder and asked very politely if we could move on, please. And suddenly, Leena didn't speak much English. Just enough to indicate, with the aid of unmistakable gestures, that I could have either more of her "proper massage" or about two minutes of being wanked aggressively: which did I want? She refused to admit understanding anything else.
"Well what do you normally do, for a sensual massage?" I asked. She didn't know what I meant.
"You've done the upper part of my body and the lower part of my body, so can't you do the bits in between?" I asked. She didn't know what I meant.
"You wan' face an' neck?" she burbled. I didn't know what she meant, but it clearly didn't mean anything I wanted it to mean.
This annoying interchange went on for about two minutes, during which our positions - and nothing else, sadly - hardened. I wanted something sensual. She wanted to sulk.
We both "won": she sulkily and resentfully touched me up from behind while I was still prone.
Eventually we both got bored with our silent war of attrition. She towelled down my back and legs, then got me to lie face upward. She arranged herself, her lube, and some tissues in a promising way - and then assaulted my member with wipes to "clean" it. It wasn't dirty; in fact, it was totally untouched, especially by HER. Besides: wtf? Romanian-style chicken-strangling with wipes, for a HANDjob?
She was a lot gentler and more capable with the actual HR than I'd expected, but she still contrived to do it in a miserably soulless and truly dismal way. I stared silently at her tits, Hammer's "Can't Touch This" playing in the background (no of course not, but it might as well have been) and thought about handling I've enjoyed more during other punts, which was easy because that was almost all of them. I did eventually come, but the imaginary sound-track shifted almost at once to Mr Jagger singing, "I can't get no..."
During the sessionNo interruptions.
Lots of time-wasting, e.g. repeatedly rubbing limbs that had already been thoroughly rubbed.
Clock-watching throughout.
Didn't really give me her full attention. She didn't play with her phone, or talk about her pets, or any of that sort of thing, but she might as well have done.
After we finishedThe shower dribbled rather than spurted; inadequately explained as some plumbing issue on the day. (I THINK the ironic symbolism was accidental. If not, then it was very heavy-handed.)
Back in the room, as I began to dress, I asked some polite and non-controversial questions that obviously I didn't care about but was asking to give Leena a chance to lighten the atmosphere. She didn't cooperate. I gave up, and in gloomy silence I put on the rest of my clothes and left.
Door-to-door punt duration: 52 minutes.
SummaryPros: good comms when booking; moderately clean and tidy; reasonable massage technique
Cons: dumpy; unfriendly; mean-spirited; misrepresented services; clock-watcher; mechanical; poor vfm, despite low headline rates
Would recommend to others? No.
Would I see her again? No.