Haslemere Chinese Massage Review
I'll start by saying I’ve not yet been for a proper punt with a WG, but had plenty of massages and happy endings, which is sufficient for me, so I know what to expect and what not to expect. I'll try and post more reviews going forwards. I thought I’d try a new area as I happened to be working not too far away.
Paid: £60 = £40 for the massage and £20 for HE
Duration: 1 hour but only stayed 40 mins
Services: Full body massage, HE
Booking
Done by text on a few hours before hand, quick responses.
Location
Right on the High Street in Wey Hill, near Haslemere Surrey, very public conspicuous entrance, so if you’re concerned about being seen this is not the place for you. Standard massage rooms, proper massage table, although a little worn and a shower in the room.
The Masseuse
I didn’t get her name, but she was a typical Chinese masseuse in her late 40s, fairly chatty, fairly slim, bit of a belly, veins on her legs. She was wearing a small dress. She was the only person there and I got the feeling she was the owner / manager. From seeing other reviews the owner may be Lucy? But I can't be sure.
The massage
Without doubt the worst I’ve had, she can’t massage for toffee. The massage basically consisted of her putting a bit of oil on and rubbing up and down. No kneeding, no deep tissue work, no focus on specific areas, just awful, I’d have had a better massage rubbing myself up against a tree! Despite asking for a medium / hard massage, and specifically pointing out areas I'd like worked on it was weak and pathetic. She did my back and my upper legs and no other areas.
The HE
No CC swipes or anything else during the massage, after 30 mins she said to turn over and then started playing with my cock and asked if I’d like a happy ending for £20 which I did (it couldn’t have been any worse than the massage!). It was average, with a reasonable technique, she used a bit of oil and after a few mins I shot my load, she spend another 5 mins(!) cleaning me up. She then started playing with her phone, no signs of any more massage to use up the time, so it was at this point I got up, paid her and left after 40 minutes.
Overall
I’ve tried quite a few Chinese massage places and they’re usually quite good, this was by far the worst of the lot and I certainly won’t be going back.
