External Link/Members Only1st Review, 1st time I've parted with cash to cum! Hopefully review is useful.
I've been fancying a massage for a while and was considering the local health club, but developed an extra itch that needed scratching. Having lurked on here for some time and reading good things about Healing Hands I thought I'd give it a go.
Communication - contacted phone number on their website, answered after a couple of rings, gave me an appointment within 30 minutes. Phone operator was clearly Chinese but had good English. Followed with a generic text to my phone about the shop's opening hours and my appointment time.
The place - busy street in residential area near Town center, highly visible front door with lots of foot traffic. Good frontage though, looks well maintained and legit from outside. Entering the shop and things took a bit of a down turn, noone on the desk desk and a bit shaby. Theres a small waiting area with a single seat and a room off to the left and right. A bit of hollering in Chinese from the right hand room where a woman poked her head out of the door (appeared to be with a client) and ushered me in to the left hand room with reasonable English. The room itself was "cosy" with a proper massage table, large single seat fabric sofa and a sink/cupboard unit. The exterior "wall" of this room is actually a large window with the vinyl wrap frontage on the outside, so lots of road and pedestrian noise despite the standard small hi-fi playing chinese musak.
The masseuse - Didn't catch her name, 5'2'', mid-30s, shoulder length black hair, average looks, no makeup, bad teeth, quite awkward. Wearing about 6 layers when I first entered the room. Had to leave the room to check prices ("just arrived yesterday"). Was originally going to go for an hour but considering surroundings and service provider quickly adjusted to 30mins (£30 30mins, £40 1hr, £60 90mins). Very, very limited English apparent from the off. Lots of chinese hollering between her and the other masseuse which continued for the first few minutes of the massage.
The massage - I stripped off completely in front of her after asking if she was staying in the room while I got changed, oh well, she's probably seen worse and going to see more in a minute. Asked firm or soft, glad I didn't ask for soft because firm hardly penetrated my insulation. Small amount of neutral smelling oil used and then general rubbing over my back and neck. She seemed keen to do a good job but didn't seem professional. I tried giving a bit of a positive groan when she did something pleasant but that didn't seem to change owt. I appreciate that 30 minutes isn't a huge amount of time to be doing a full body massage so I'll give her the benefit of the doubt here. Massage proceded from my back and arms to my legs, again just general rubbing including my arse. Very light CC swipes, no teasing or erotic techniques otherwise. After she finished my back she cleaned me off with nice moist warm towel first then some abrasive kitchen roll to wake me back up!
The HE - no discussion about extras up until this point but then suddenly leaned in and asked "you want happy ending? £20 okay?". No offer of B2B, didn't ask to see her with kit off. Flipped over and took her a bit of time to get John past half mast with nails over the inner thigh and sack. Eventually got there and very light HJ given. We all like different things and light touch may have been used for eroticism but wasnt for me. It was just enough to get the sap rising but didn't have me firing on all cylinders. Ended up focusing on the sensations and thinking of the missus to speed up the ending. Then made the fatal mistake of trying to give instructions in the final moments, total inability to get the gist of what I was asking for (firmer, faster, longer etc) which meant just as the firing gun went off she was still giving me this slow thumb to forefinger ring light wank that virtually gave me a ruined orgasm. Glad I hadn't tried to ask for anything more complicated like hunt the prostate. Anyway, I was temporarily drained at least and massage finished with a clean up, a scalp rub and wierd clicky thing on my fingers and toes.
Timing - left after 40 minutes which seems right considering changing time and maybe a couple of minutes extra getting blood to the right places as not properly warmed up during the massage. Got a text after I left asking if I was still coming to my appointment, probably from the primary masseuse, might have had a better time with her?
TL;DR - £30+£20 for 30 minute full body massage and HE by average (looking and skilled) masseuse. Can't give it the same glowing review as others, maybe my standards are too high. Not an experience I'll rush to repeat. Not a negative as nothing unpleasant or unexpected happened.
