External Link/Members Only 1hr Massage £50 + £60 B2B + RO (£110 total)
Preamble Bollocks
There's a definite link between the quality of graphic design on AMP websites and the chances of getting extras. The more modern and tasteful the website, the more legit the place is. To have any hope of extras you need to go for the establishment with the most nauseating car-crash of different fonts and colours. Maylee's website starts all classy, but fortunately you only have to scroll down a little way to find a price-list straight out of a 1970s takeaway menu!
Comms
Good quick, clear comms, all via SMS.
Location
Not the most discreet of locations on a busy high street opposite a Sainsburys. However, the door was wide open, so easy to nip-into at full speed. The parlour is at the top of a flight of stairs on the first floor, so avoid if you've got mobility problems. Inside it's clean and tidy. There wasn't an ensuite in the room I was shown into and I wasn't offered a shower, so no idea what the shower's like or indeed if there is one. The massage table was one of the comfiest that I've laid on, very well padded and covered with a clean paper sheet. The face hole was particularly comfy. Parking was easy in the aforementioned Sainsburys, though note they use an ANPR system, so don't use if you're wearing a tin foil hat. Cost a couple of quid for 90 minutes, which you can redeem in store against the purchase of the obligatory post-punt porkpie.
Mandy
Mandy (or "Man-Deeee!" as she introduced herself) is a pleasant-looking 30-something Chinese GND. She doesn't speak much Engrish, so don't expect any bants. She seemed very calm, happy and relaxed though, so easy company.
Massage
Mandy's massage skills are extraordinary. She just has a wonderful touch. Not too hard, never painful, but still somehow able to release all the relevant knots and stresses. It felt amazing, and I wouldn't have minded if my time had turned out to be completely legit. She's one of those rare masseuses who make you feel good as soon as she lays hands in you.
Extras
There's a sign in the room explicitly forbidding requesting extras. Fortunately, Mandy whispered in my ear at the turn-over. Unusually, money wasn't mentioned at this stage, so we moved seamlessly into the B2B. Mandy has a lovely pair of small but extremely perky titties, with lovely poke-yer-eye-out thimble nipples, which she happily presented to me for my pleasure. It must be down to my formative years spent fumbling around with girls in the 1980s, but I was thrilled to discover Mandy's gloriously hairy snatch. She looked a bit bemused when I asked her for some RO, but turned around and plonked herself down on my face so that I could enjoy some delicious hairy pie. Her HJ rivals her massage skills - a real magic touch - and she brought proceedings to a very satisfying climax. After I had recovered my composure and got dressed, I asked how much I owed her, to which she just shrugged. I'd had a great time, so I gave her £60, which she seemed happy with.
Conclusion
Superb skills and service make this a strong positive. I'm a bit indifferent about the venue though - it's fine, but I would've liked an ensuite shower. I'm not going to rush back, but I might return the next time I find myself in Aylesbury.
