So i have a problem cuming..

[k94]

Alright lads..im probably not your usual punter. I can get sex freely, uni going guy reasonably attractive etc, not blowing my own trumpet just some background info. But here's the problem and the reason im resorting to punting. I cant for the life of me cum during sex, which as you can imagine is a massive fucking problem! Haven't seen a doctor yet but it could be that im scared of being judged in bed by girls or expectations? I just dont fucking know. Could you guys throw some punting recommendations my way; in particular girls that would be particularly great in a calming a guy down and fairly understanding and any tips if you guys suffer/suffered from this problem. I should probably mention that I've only had sex twice, failed to cum in intercourse twice..jacked myself of to finish. Thanks lads

[k94]

Forget to mention that im based in London around Camden area

[maxxblue]

Alright lads..im probably not your usual punter. I can get sex freely, uni going guy reasonably attractive etc, not blowing my own trumpet just some background info. But here's the problem and the reason im resorting to punting. I cant for the life of me cum during sex, which as you can imagine is a massive fucking problem! Haven't seen a doctor yet but it could be that im scared of being judged in bed by girls or expectations? I just dont fucking know. Could you guys throw some punting recommendations my way; in particular girls that would be particularly great in a calming a guy down and fairly understanding and any tips if you guys suffer/suffered from this problem. I should probably mention that I've only had sex twice, failed to cum in intercourse twice..jacked myself of to finish. Thanks lads

Why lie? You've tripped yourself up big time here. Just be honest and say it how it is. You are fairly inexperienced at sex - so what. You are much more likely to receive genuine support from the punters here if you don't try to make yourself look like something you aren't. And by the way, there is no such thing as a usual punter!

[k94]

My apologies..by freely i didnt meant easily or routinely, just without having to pay for it. I am inexperienced no doubt..which is why i wish to try my hand at this, to see if its any different. Thanks for the reply though

[vorian]

My apologies..by freely i didnt meant easily or routinely, just without having to pay for it. I am inexperienced no doubt..which is why i wish to try my hand at this, to see if its any different. Thanks for the reply though

If you can't cum through wanking  then you may have a medical issue and should see a doctor. If you can then don't worry about it. All blokes are different,  some cum very easily,  some blokes find it much harder everyone is different. Personally for me with punting it's not about the cumming it's the fun getting there that counts.

[finn5555]

If you can't fire the old porridge pistol during sex you are either

1. Fucking butt ugly women
2. Have some kind of hangup that only a shrink can resolve


 

[johnny.bravo]

Perhaps you're not attracted to females... try your hand at booking a male escort rather than female? You will find your answer there instead of visiting a doctor (which I also suggest you do at some point, just to be on the safe side)

I believe adultwork has male escort listings too... good luck mate

[vorian]

If you can't fire the old porridge pistol during sex you are either

1. Fucking butt ugly women
2. Have some kind of hangup that only a shrink can resolve


 

Think he meant he can't come through penetrative sex,  for me its the condoms that stops me , vast majority of the time I don't come that way.  Hasn't been a problem as it stays hard and just finish by HR, OWO, COF or CIM.  I don't think this is that unusual but maybe I'm wrong,  doesn't bother me in the slightest.

[maxxblue]

If you can't fire the old porridge pistol during sex you are either

1. Fucking butt ugly women
2. Have some kind of hangup that only a shrink can resolve


 

I like your empathic, sensitive approach. If only my psychosexual counsellor was as skillful and caring as you... 

[finn5555]

I like your empathic, sensitive approach. If only my psychosexual counsellor was as skillful and caring as you... 

I have had training from mumsnet members

[k94]

Think he meant he can't come through penetrative sex,  for me its the condoms that stops me , vast majority of the time I don't come that way.  Hasn't been a problem as it stays hard and just finish by HR, OWO, COF or CIM.  I don't think this is that unusual but maybe I'm wrong,  doesn't bother me in the slightest.

This is what i was roughly on about. Appreciate the advice, im 100% sure im not gay, not that theres anything wrong with it. I havent had sex without protection yet but im sure itl be alot more stimulating seeing as how i wouldn't be able to feel a hammer smash my knob in a condom. Glad to know i wasnt the only one, thanks

[domino131]

I find that if you are for any reason nervous it has the effect of making it either too easy or too difficult to cum, can happen either way.  Given that you say you've only had sex twice, well, it's normal to be nervous.  I have seen escorts advertised who say that they cater to the inexperienced; can't remember specific ones but if I spot them again I'll post them here.

[webpunter]

Think he meant he can't come through penetrative sex,  for me its the condoms that stops me , vast majority of the time I don't come that way.  Hasn't been a problem as it stays hard and just finish by HR, OWO, COF or CIM.  I don't think this is that unusual but maybe I'm wrong,  doesn't bother me in the slightest.

Totally agree on two points:  1/ its the getting there that counts & is all the fun [see recent 'V' post] & 2/ getting 'over the line' with a condom is a nightmare.  Especially when having had a few bevvies 

Much better to have some foreplay - then some sex [not too much time for me] - and then lie back, make no effort & enjoy.  Hopefully then plenty of edging & then watch it fly about.  The more the better & good for the ego.  Especially after a few days abstinence !

[vorian]

Totally agree on two points:  1/ its the getting there that counts & is all the fun [see recent 'V' post] & 2/ getting 'over the line' with a condom is a nightmare.  Especially when having had a few bevvies 

Much better to have some foreplay - then some sex [not too much time for me] - and then lie back, make no effort & enjoy.  Hopefully then plenty of edging & then watch it fly about.  The more the better & good for the ego.  Especially after a few days abstinence !

I couldn't agree more,  edging,  more edging and then some more edging followed by the artexing the ceiling cum shot.

[Mr Br1ghts1de]

I couldn't agree more,  edging,  more edging and then some more edging followed by the artexing the ceiling cum shot.

 

Usually, I would look to cum twice in an hour's punt and may be frustrated if not, but I've had a couple of very hot edging sessions and then a final orgasmic release, e.g. see very recent review

[webpunter]

I couldn't agree more,  edging,  more edging and then some more edging followed by the artexing the ceiling cum shot.

In your dreams ! I don't know of any AW girlies who have rooms with unusually low ceilings or do it on top-bunk
Let me know who they are
I just love UKP - it's such a laugh !

[Trenlover]

very difficult to cum with a condom during sex, your only option is to get ultra thin ones or go bb.

It also depends on how much you wank, frequent monkey spanking desensitizes the penis and increases prolactin both of which will make orgasm during sex more difficult.

if you stop wanking for 3-4 days you should find things easier. Also there are pharmaceutical options, cabergoline is fantastic for increasing libido and penis sensitivity, as is reboxetine but be careful with this as it reduces bloodflow to the penis and makes getting an erection almost impossible, you need viagra if you use reboxetine.

[vorian]

very difficult to cum with a condom during sex, your only option is to get ultra thin ones or go bb.

It also depends on how much you wank, frequent monkey spanking desensitizes the penis and increases prolactin both of which will make orgasm during sex more difficult.

if you stop wanking for 3-4 days you should find things easier. Also there are pharmaceutical options, cabergoline is fantastic for increasing libido and penis sensitivity, as is reboxetine but be careful with this as it reduces bloodflow to the penis and makes getting an erection almost impossible, you need viagra if you use reboxetine.

Good post and good ideas 

[Kingb3000]

It may be - only might.... too much right/left hand action.... but take a look here

 External Link/Members Only

[andrei]

why the fcuk would you ask for what appears to be advice concerning a medical situation on a punting forum?

[jcdmj12]

Alright lads..im probably not your usual punter. I can get sex freely, uni going guy reasonably attractive etc, not blowing my own trumpet just some background info. But here's the problem and the reason im resorting to punting. I cant for the life of me cum during sex, which as you can imagine is a massive fucking problem! Haven't seen a doctor yet but it could be that im scared of being judged in bed by girls or expectations? I just dont fucking know. Could you guys throw some punting recommendations my way; in particular girls that would be particularly great in a calming a guy down and fairly understanding and any tips if you guys suffer/suffered from this problem. I should probably mention that I've only had sex twice, failed to cum in intercourse twice..jacked myself of to finish. Thanks lads

How much porn do you watch?

If the answer is "a lot", you need to read this site:

External Link/Members Only

Don't worry, it's not one of these evalengical "STOP TOUCHING YOUR PENIS OR GOD WILL KILL YOU" type sites. It's aimed at guys who have fucked up their mental wiring by wanking off to streaming video porn too much, and helping them enjoy sex again.

Worked for me - I started having problems coming, rolled back the old XHamster habit, problem went away. 

[k94]

How much porn do you watch?

If the answer is "a lot", you need to read this site:

External Link/Members Only

Don't worry, it's not one of these evalengical "STOP TOUCHING YOUR PENIS OR GOD WILL KILL YOU" type sites. It's aimed at guys who have fucked up their mental wiring by wanking off to streaming video porn too much, and helping them enjoy sex again.

Worked for me - I started having problems coming, rolled back the old XHamster habit, problem went away.

External Link/Members Only

So i did abit of reading around on this, that link/article seems particularly relevant. The general consensus around here seems to be that i should stop masturbating and watching porn. Which seems very reasonable while that article uses science to back it up slightly. I will definitely give the "porridge pistol" as somebody eloquently put it earlier a slight break, then have a punt and will report back. I'm sure im not the only one that suffers from this, could well be many lurkers with a similar problem, reckon im something of a guinea pig. Thanks for the help everyone!

[LL]

Save your jizz for 2 weeks.
Go for a tantra massage (google it)
Blow your load
Relax
Wait another 2 weeks
Go see a decent WG
Blow your load

(I should be a doctor) 

[vorian]

Save your jizz for 2 weeks.
Go for a tantra massage (google it)
Blow your load
Relax
Wait another 2 weeks
Go see a decent WG
Blow your load

(I should be a doctor) 

Is that all available on the NHS and if not why not. 

[jcdmj12]

External Link/Members Only

So i did abit of reading around on this, that link/article seems particularly relevant. The general consensus around here seems to be that i should stop masturbating and watching porn. Which seems very reasonable while that article uses science to back it up slightly. I will definitely give the "porridge pistol" as somebody eloquently put it earlier a slight break, then have a punt and will report back. I'm sure im not the only one that suffers from this, could well be many lurkers with a similar problem, reckon im something of a guinea pig. Thanks for the help everyone!

Good move      It's not as if you have much to lose by doing it.  If you want more of the science behind it, do some reading around neuroplasticity and dopamine. I'm lucky in that I'm a bit older, so my initial fascination with porn was during the VHS video and pictures downloaded over a modem days.    Free Streaming porn is like freebasing the stuff.

Also, if you can afford it, try booking a longer meet with a reliable GFE type WG. Tell her up front you aren't too worried about coming quickly, you just want a chilled out sensual time.  Whilst you're with her just allow yourself to get lost in the pleasant sensations.  Forget about coming.  Just be in the moment.  Assuming you don't have a genuine physical problem, which at your age I'm willing to bet you don't, coming will take care of itself.

Plus, you will enjoy sex 1000x times more once you get that the journey is far more important than the destination. 

[sucky2dollar]

Avoid wanking and porn for a couple of weeks, increase your exercise during this time

Get some thin condoms, i.e. Sagami 0.02's or 1's if you can find them, go visit a prossie

don't try to 'perform', just be selfish and bash away
you'll cum buckets

[webpunter]

very difficult to cum with a condom during sex, your only option is to get ultra thin ones or go bb.

It also depends on how much you wank, frequent monkey spanking desensitizes the penis and increases prolactin both of which will make orgasm during sex more difficult.

Ultra thin condoms - beware as they can be "things that go bang in the night" [& the day]
Monkey spanking - maybe an idea to use this instead of Mrs Palmer & her five daughters: External Link/Members Only

[cockneybstrd]

Forget to mention that im based in London around Camden area

Maybe go hang around the lock area at night. it won't make you cum, but i am sure the local youths might give you a serious kick in

which might stop you wanking for a while and help with you inability to cum

[kowalski]

Get her to give you a bit of FUB Finger up bum, that usually ups the action a bit.

[hollysbeenabadgirl]

Ultra thin condoms - beware as they can be "things that go bang in the night" [& the day]

Depends...The only breakages I have had(years ago) was with Durex Extra Strong and a lot of ladies have reported that on SAAFE also.

Zero are seriously weird, strangle Mr Average and yet attempt to come off  Yet SYKNS(non latex, thin and come in extra lubricated, standard and large) feel really thin but are brilliant in every way.

[vorian]

Depends...The only breakages I have had(years ago) was with Durex Extra Strong and a lot of ladies have reported that on SAAFE also.

Zero are seriously weird, strangle Mr Average and yet attempt to come off  Yet SYKNS(non latex, thin and come in extra lubricated, standard and large) feel really thin but are brilliant in every way.

I still think a prossie friendly range of condoms should be created, color coded so the WG know what the different sizes are, but all individually marked in big letters "EXTRA LARGE KING SIZE" for the punters benefit.

[hollysbeenabadgirl]

I still think a prossie friendly range of condoms should be created, color coded so the WG know what the different sizes are, but all individually marked in big letters "EXTRA LARGE KING SIZE" for the punters benefit.

  When I first tried the large SKYNS I wanted to road test them on erm... my average regulars as I could not wait for a larger gent. New toy syndrome 

They actually hug a Mr Average quite well as they seem to stretch to accommodate better than a pussy does.

I had a few egos walk out the door that week after saying "Let's try a large"

Oops...secrets out. Sorry boys!

[vorian]

When I first tried the large SKYNS I wanted to road test them on erm... my average regulars as I could not wait for a larger gent. New toy syndrome 

They actually hug a Mr Average quite well as they seem to stretch to accommodate better than a pussy does.

I had a few egos walk out the door that week after saying "Let's try a large"

Oops...secrets out. Sorry boys!

Your be telling us you don't always have massive orgasams with every single punter next Holly.  . Or you aren't always thinking of the shopping list when a punters head is buried in the holylist of holys. 

[hollysbeenabadgirl]

Your be telling us you don't always have massive orgasams with every single punter next Holly.  . Or you aren't always thinking of the shopping list when a punters head is buried in the holylist of holys. 

Of course I do not 

No, no, I have never thought of my shopping list, but have thought the ceiling could do with a paint 

[webpunter]

but have thought the ceiling could do with a paint 

Brilliant !
'Vee' - top bunk was it ?

On the subject of condoms then best to avoid these ones me thinks
External Link/Members Only
The quote is 'superior body heat transfer'
Which is not surprising
My experience is that they feel fucking brilliant - until you think 'actually a little too fucking brilliant ??'
After stopping to check you then think - well where's the rest of it gone ?

[ONeil]

Avoid wanking and porn for a couple of weeks

Couldn't be bothered to read this entire thread, but I can tell you that this is the answer ^^^^^

Except instead of stopping porn and masturbation for 2 weeks, just stop period - this will take some time and will power in order to do, but it is worth it.

Research is coming out that people who have built up a habit of masturbating to porn since they were young up until their twenties, are experiencing problems in getting erections, and ejaculating during real sex.

The good news is you can reverse this effect very easily by stopping masturbating to porn. Just stop. And having sex (seems you've figured out that you can have sex quite easily with prossies

Stop masturbating completely, and replace it with having sex at least once a week (this is going to be easier if you find a girlfriend after your problem is fixed).

There are people on this forum who will tell you that this is all bullshit, and that masturbating to porn will not affect your ability to cum or get erections. But these are people who just don't want to give up masturbating - so ignore them.

Good luck with improving your sex life!

[kowalski]

I believe that porn has taken the thill factor to such an unrealistic expectation of sex that when you actually have a real woman it just don't cut the mustard. I agree that stoping the porn brings back reaalism.I can take bloody for ever but a 5 day break had me enjoying the real girl better and cum in mouth with serious focusing.Ultimatly I believe You Porn fucks up the dick/mind.Im putting the laptop in the garage this week.

[Tsar Nikolai II]

One of the official terms for this is retarded ejaculation.
External Link/Members Only

Suppose it might suit some girls, because it means you can go for ages. But I dated one who kept crying because she thought it meant she was inadequate, because her previous boyfriends all suffered premature ejaculation and would spurt after a couple of minutes.

One solution isn't punting related, but try a buttplug during the act, or some pegging beforehand as a warm up. The extra stimulation of the prostate (internally) should send you over the edge much faster.


For those suggesting give up the porn or wanking, how do you deal with the ridiculous level of horniness that results from abstaining longer than a day? Once a week? Unlikely. Not unless you start putting saltpeter in your tea.