Getting caught out?!

[Rochdull lad]

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Don't you just love the word "philanderers" in one of those headlines?  I always think it's one of those words which, like the phrase "uses prostitutes", says so much in so little.

I often wonder whether a sub-editor who's used a word or phrase like that is one himself!

[sumertime]

Some years ago [pre punting] I was away from regular GF on a two week Mgt course. First day I met this hot tottie and we decided to have the inbetween weekend at a romantic hotel in the Cotswolds.  It was a wow!! but she was a high flyer and did not want any long relationships {shame}. Made excuses with GF said had to work through to prepare full project report but would make it up when I had finished... Thought I had it all sorted, got to her place, randy and ready. Threw my jacket over the chair and my wallet flew out (safe I thought, I had paid cash and no bills...). She picked it up and stuffed it back in the side pocket on to the neatly folded hotel reservation confirmation (for Mr & Mrs Jackson!)...
So much for my careful planning... GF kicked me out after an hours garbled excusses.  Left licking wounds and a fading memory of a rampant weekend which cost about £400 and a pretty cool lady back home.

I don't have to worry these days as there is no GF - but the message is think with the head not the dick, "watch the paper trail" and of course the electronic trails....

[Mr Farkyhars]

Some years ago [pre punting] I was away from regular GF on a two week Mgt course. First day I met this hot tottie and we decided to have the inbetween weekend at a romantic hotel in the Cotswolds.  It was a wow!! but she was a high flyer and did not want any long relationships {shame}. Made excuses with GF said had to work through to prepare full project report but would make it up when I had finished... Thought I had it all sorted, got to her place, randy and ready. Threw my jacket over the chair and my wallet flew out (safe I thought, I had paid cash and no bills...). She picked it up and stuffed it back in the side pocket on to the neatly folded hotel reservation confirmation (for Mr & Mrs Jackson!)...
So much for my careful planning... GF kicked me out after an hours garbled excusses.  Left licking wounds and a fading memory of a rampant weekend which cost about £400 and a pretty cool lady back home.

I don't have to worry these days as there is no GF - but the message is think with the head not the dick, "watch the paper trail" and of course the electronic trails....

Am I the only one who can't make out what happened here? Or are you saying the GF took out and read the hotel booking, expecting it to be in your name only?

[SirFrank]

Not punting but almost got caught out swinging a few years back. Had a friend with benefits type relationship. Used to meet up daytimes with a girl I met on a swinging website. One night my mobile rang and my wife said your phone is ringing it says its Natalie (not real name). Gulp! I answered it and left room and it was this woman's fella wanting to know who I was and why my number was on his girls phone. I played dumb and said don't know who you are talking about mate etc.

My wife was running a bath so had gone upstairs (she's not nosey thankfully)   I told her it was someone from work. I phoned the girl later (withheld my number) and said your fella phoned me. She had made up some bullshit that he swallowed. I don't use my personal phone to punt and use an old personal phone with payg sim. It doesn't hold its charge but try to cover my tracks well.

[sumertime]

Am I the only one who can't make out what happened here? Or are you saying the GF took out and read the hotel booking, expecting it to be in your name only?

Sorry, could almost write a book on it!!  GF rang the mgt college to be told closed no students - even though I had called and said I was working there (not in a hotel 50 miles away)... didn't think she was the "suspicious type" until she looked at the note in pocket. The tottie had just returned from working in South America, blond, neat, great legs and a liberal user of red lippie!! Ahhh.. the memories.. 

The moral to the tale...... check, check and check again!

[petite_nikki]

Its not just escorts that should'nt contact a client when not asked to do soo some clients need to be bit more carefull dont leave numbers in their phone if its your personnal one dont write number on bit of paper cover your tracks not very nice when you have an anger wife calling you or texting you and 9 times out of 10 they say i know he's up to something and we get the brunt of it be careful cover your tracks and have fun.

[rockharders]

I worry about being caught with a scent on me, or marks of some sort. Even if I have a good wash I fear my OH might notice an unusual soap spell. I've become so paranoid I only punt when she's away at her mother's. Saves me a fortune though 

Yep, happened to me too. Came home one evening after a fabulous punt and she noticed my hair and clothes smelt of perfume. Blamed it on some new moisturising cream I tried out.

[BogBog1]

I found that having a separate punting phone was worse - a former GF found it and asked questions about why I would have a much lower quality phone than my regular one, and to be honest I didn't really have a good answer. LUCKILY I'd deleted all call, text history from it so it just looked like an old phone that I'd forgotten to chuck away/recycle. But it was a tricky conversation, made worse by the fact that I was clearly shitting myself that the truth would come out so must have been acting really suspiciously.

Now I use several layers of cover: I upload an entirely separate browser before going onto AW/UKP, always use private browsing, get the numbers I need, then delete the entire browser, so there's basically no record. Then delete all call/text records and number stored. 5 years in (ever since ditching the second PAYG phone) I've never been caught, and I've never failed to do all the necessary deleting. Also, I never punt on a day that I know I'll be coming home to the current GF - I only punt when I'm either away for work for a night (which I am every couple of weeks), or when she's away (which is less frequent but happens maybe once every couple of months). That avoids the problems of perfume, long hairs of the wrong colour, unfamiliar-smelling shower gel etc.....

[Sailormack]

Thank fuck I'm single, I didn't realise how much shit some of you have to put up with on here.

Always used a punting phone though for other reasons than avoiding detection from GF but that's a whole other story.

[Toshiba]

Must admit im lucky to never have my girlfriend even the slightest bit interested of my phone

I do all the deletions though just in case

I only ever use an agency so i might start using a pay phone, the browser worry is my only concern, leaving the escort page open in google and one day she needs to borrow my phone, thatd be awkward to explain

[webpunter]

This happened after me and a civvie friend filmed our sex games (I'm married)

I watched the fun and games on my new brand new samsung smart TV  from USB stick while the wife was out. Removed and safely stashed away USB drive,

Wife returns and I'm demonstrating new features of the TV and one screen shows thumbnails of videos and photos recently viewed. So there are video stills of my lover with my cock in her on my 50 inch TV with my wife and i looking at it . I quickly scrolled by and luckily my face couldn't be be seen in any thumbnail. I thought I was going to die there and then of shock 

My embarrassing, but not so fatal to my marriage excuse was I had been looking at porn.

I made it my mission within minutes to learn how to delete video and photo history.

Just picked up on this thread - absolutely hilarious.  With this one in particular & the others including car crashes [getting rammed up the behind - so to speak] i have been literally crying with laughter for the last 5 mins or so.  Hopefully this will bring the memories flooding back to BTD2 in particular

Now for my tips:
1/  only ever send messages on AW via their internal system.  Clicking on private emails can have a nasty habit of sending external emails through servers & the like - easy to trace in the future

2/  printing stuff can be bad news.  A mate of mine said he was working with a bloke who was himself working from home - online.  He presses print on some porn & contacts & then goes into the adjoining room to take off the printer etc.  Only to then wonder why this hadn't printed.  The OH is on her way home & doesn't give it much thought.  Until he gets into the office the next day & realizes he selected the work printer.  As the work environment was very politically correct he lasted about an hour & that included clearing his desk.  Only upside i can see is that he didn't have to work with boring fuckers any more

[Matty24579]

I used to have a girlfriend but we split up at the end of May last year.She was very old fashioned and boring sex was very embarrising so April last year we had a row over her trying to take over my life she wanted to move in but i said no so she got funny with it so torwards the end of April i decided to have a couple of punts and I really enjoyed it .Anyway I never told her as it was the wise thing to do she was also the jealous type and was not all the ticket either we had a sex session once and i was wearing a condom  just to protect me and she got funny with it.

[MDB72]

What about the punting related injury?? I am a larger guy. Managed to put my knee through her bed. Slight cut on foot which was ok but then a couple of days later horrendous bruising on foot and shin. Managed to say that I had run into my desk at work when I was shifting around in chair. So be aware.

[webpunter]

What about the punting related injury?? I am a larger guy. Managed to put my knee through her bed. Slight cut on foot which was ok but then a couple of days later horrendous bruising on foot and shin. Managed to say that I had run into my desk at work when I was shifting around in chair. So be aware.

Don't you just hate cheap beds.  Just remember:  "it takes a big hammer to drive a long nail".  If you get my snow-drift