Refusing extras

[Masseffect321]

Is it just me but sometimes does it not feel rude to refuse extras?
Had an experience recently where I had a very good massage but the woman was just not doing it for me, not attracted to her at all.
The bit I found difficult is that she did plenty of cc swipes, reach unders and even a cheeky finger up the bum, but I had already made up my mind and after after all the obvious effort she went through to get extras (ie HR) I said no. Her face dropped and I felt pretty bad.
Should I have made it clear I was not after extras at the start of the massage? If this was the case I was afraid she would put much less effort into it.
Anyway, would be grateful for any thoughts about this, is there any etiquette to this?
Probably me just being stupid but hey ho.
Thanks

[GingerNuts]

Some they win, some they lose.

Her face dropped and I felt pretty bad.

I'm sure she soon got over it.

[scutty brown]

if your guilt really needed appeasing you could just have given her a tip for the massage

[houseboot]

Your body, your money, your choice.

As scutty said, their is still an option to give her a tip.

[Global_Punter]

The option of extra works both ways an SP can refuse to offer extras, the same applies to the punter.

There was an article years ago about an MP that was offered a HE after a message session, he was surprised when offered extras & declined.

Extras should be optional thats why it's called extras.
 

[LLPunting]

Renegade rather than Paragon then.

As SB said and so should've your common sense, if she's given you a decent amount of encouragement for free then tip the woman a tenner OR else stop her straightaway.  If you'd only wanted a genuine massage then why not go to a legit parlour? 

[Masseffect321]

Perhaps I should have just given her a tip, would have made things more fair.
Something to keep in mind for next time I guess

[Masseffect321]

Renegade rather than Paragon then.

As SB said and so should've your common sense, if she's given you a decent amount of encouragement for free then tip the woman a tenner OR else stop her straightaway.  If you'd only wanted a genuine massage then why not go to a legit parlour?

It's not like I went there for a legit massage, was definitely looking for extra, I was just really not attracted to this particular lady

[jesse4585]

Renegade rather than Paragon then.

As SB said and so should've your common sense, if she's given you a decent amount of encouragement for free then tip the woman a tenner OR else stop her straightaway. 

This almost sounds like you care  about the WG! Bioware are a full on SJW company, if you let yourself be influenced by their morality system you'll soon be a white knight. 

@ Masseffect321 ,  no it's not just you. I was in that situation once. Was walking down a busy st in London's theatre land when a Chinese woman asked me if I wanted  a massage.  I'd already been a punter for years but never a massage punter - the only paid massages I'd have were proper sports massages or the 5€ jobs you get from Chinese women on the beach in Spain.  She was maybe mid 30s and not that attractive, I naively assumed it was for a genuine massage. Had a bit of tension in my shoulders so thought why not, & followed in into the shop.   Once she got started & I twigged she was a whore,  I told her I'd made a mistake & hand't understood. I said I only wanted a regular massage as I had a girlfriend  (didn't want to hurt her feelings by saying I wasn't attracted to her).  And I gave her £30 extra just so her time wasn't wasted.   My thinking was without the extra fee she'd make nothing or maybe even be out of pocket due to the house rental.  It was a good relaxing massage at least, and afterwards she said I was a good man who had 'passed the test'.   

[mr mischief]

It's not like I went there for a legit massage, was definitely looking for extra, I was just really not attracted to this particular lady

We are all different,  but I certainly don't need to be that attracted to the massuse to let her wank me off. Im more interested in the quality of the massage and how well they achieve the inevitable.

[Masseffect321]

I didn't think many people on here would know about Mass Effect, I'm pleasantly surprised 

[daviemac]

I didn't think many people on here would know about Mass Effect, I'm pleasantly surprised 

Not sure what a video game has to do with this thread. 

[Avg_Joe]

usually, if they put the effort in, yes they would expect/hope you to take up even the cheapest option, that said....... there is no rule saying you have to, and no specific etiquette to follow (that i know of) only things i would say are, that after putting the effort in cc swipes etc, on reaching under if the little fella isn't having any of it she should have taken the hint and probably not offered, likewise, had you stopped her sticking a finger up your ass, she would also have probably gotten the message, also given that that is hardly a staple in a standard no "thrills" massage, you probably shouldn't have let her do that if you had no intentions at that point of taking any extras (some places will class that as an extra, or part of one!)

[Masseffect321]

usually, if they put the effort in, yes they would expect/hope you to take up even the cheapest option, that said....... there is no rule saying you have to, and no specific etiquette to follow (that i know of) only things i would say are, that after putting the effort in cc swipes etc, on reaching under if the little fella isn't having any of it she should have taken the hint and probably not offered, likewise, had you stopped her sticking a finger up your ass, she would also have probably gotten the message, also given that that is hardly a staple in a standard no "thrills" massage, you probably shouldn't have let her do that if you had no intentions at that point of taking any extras (some places will class that as an extra, or part of one!)

Yeah I understand, I perhaps let it go to far to say no.
It's much harder to stop her from doing things like that at the time however, at least for me! Something easier to think about in retrospect.

[Avg_Joe]

without a doubt.

i'm not a fan of the finger up the ass, but one girl managed to slip one up there before i could stop her once, but she didn't get far before she got the message!

[LLPunting]

Not sure what a video game has to do with this thread. 

You haven't met an Asari!

Now if only there was a suitable SP who did cosplay as Liara (or her "father") and could do the voice too.

[mradventures]

ive read they only really make money on the "extra's" but i dont know if thats true, ive requsted cuddles instead a couple of times (for same fee)

[LLPunting]

ive read they only really make money on the "extra's" but i dont know if thats true, ive requsted cuddles instead a couple of times (for same fee)

Some girls claim that, oft times I find that's them trying to guilt you out, talk to the management and you find some places give girls part of the booking fee.  In the salons that rent rooms out the girls will be looking to recoup their outlay on renting the room for the shift.

[houseboot]

Some girls claim that, oft times I find that's them trying to guilt you out, talk to the management and you find some places give girls part of the booking fee.  In the salons that rent rooms out the girls will be looking to recoup their outlay on renting the room for the shift.

What the girls tell you may be true, might not be true.

What the management tells you may be true, might not be true.

You pay at reception what you are asked to pay at reception, you pay in the room what you are asked to pay in the room (although the "extras" element may be negotiable ... If it's reasonable pay it, if it's outrageous negotiate or walk away)

What happens behind the scenes is between management and the girls. It will vary from shop to shop.

It's not your concern, my concern or any third party.

[Doc Holliday]

I am in awe of anyone who (exorbitant cost issues aside) has the willpower to decline a hand job when offered. 

[Jonestown]

ive read they only really make money on the "extra's" but i dont know if thats true, ive requsted cuddles instead a couple of times (for same fee)

In London TCM shops the girls get circa one third of the door fee, its almost universal given the amount of movement of girls between shops.

[Jonestown]

Even if you go for a straight massage place/girl it's customary to give a £5/10 tip at the end if it was been a good service, so it would have been good Kama for the OP to have slipped the lady a folded one.

[daviemac]

You haven't met an Asari!

Now if only there was a suitable SP who did cosplay as Liara (or her "father") and could do the voice too.

Not that I know of.   

[bhudda]

Even if you go for a straight massage place/girl it's customary to give a £5/10 tip at the end if it was been a good service, so it would have been good Kama for the OP to have slipped the lady a folded one.

Not when i visit it isnt!

And theres no such thing as kama.

[bhudda]

I am in awe of anyone who (exorbitant cost issues aside) has the willpower to decline a hand job when offered. 

Yes, reminds me of a naughty stripper who removed my cock from her mouth at the end of the song and asked me if i wanted her to carry on ... how do you say "no thanks, i'd like you to stop sucking my cock now" ? Even if it is £20 for every three minutes.

[Cervixbanger]

The option of extra works both ways an SP can refuse to offer extras, the same applies to the punter.

There was an article years ago about an MP that was offered a HE after a message session, he was surprised when offered extras & declined.

Extras should be optional thats why it's called extras.

I agree - how many times have us punters asked for extras and been refused? I don't really understand why the OP is feeling guilty but I would suggest two ways out of this situation if he's still concerned for the future:

1. When the subject of extras is raised, say something along the lines of "yes please, I'd like OWO ending in CIM and then I'd like to watch you play with it for a while before swallowing a weeks load". Then it's her doing the refusing.

2. Say that you're going home to fuck the wife senseless straight afterwards and she'll be very suspicious if you can't produce the usual 'goods'.

In any case, if waiter service has been excellent in a restaurant do you feel a need to accept a second bottle of wine then when offered? Same principle in my book.

[Hobbit]

Is it just me but sometimes does it not feel rude to refuse extras?
Had an experience recently where I had a very good massage but the woman was just not doing it for me, not attracted to her at all.
The bit I found difficult is that she did plenty of cc swipes, reach unders and even a cheeky finger up the bum, but I had already made up my mind and after after all the obvious effort she went through to get extras (ie HR) I said no. Her face dropped and I felt pretty bad.
Should I have made it clear I was not after extras at the start of the massage? If this was the case I was afraid she would put much less effort into it.
Anyway, would be grateful for any thoughts about this, is there any etiquette to this?
Probably me just being stupid but hey ho.
Thanks

If you truly feel that guilty then buy her a house, give her some babies and raise her children to become monks and good citizens of society that would lead all the countries to world peace and unite all humanity. Or if you don't feel that guilty then don't worry about it and just move on.