Right.... First review so go easy on me. Typing this on my phone too.
Just back from a bit of a strange experience but long story short I got the end I was looking for... But it was a neutral experience.
Contact: not bad. Sent a text. Asked if they do happy ending. Told happy ending is extra £20 on top of anything. 25 30min... 40 60min...body to body is extra 40.
Just said I'll be there later on in the afternoon. Sound call when your there.
Location : pits of hell
Up in those so called dundasvale flats that look like holding cells for the Fuckin deranged folk.... I turned up just outside cowcaddens. Called and was told to walk up some dark steps under the number 14 block. Went up expecting to either get mugged or finger blasted by a junkie. Safely made it to the top.
Came to a security door and said she will be there in a sec. Unless she teleported to the door before she hung up without a phone in hand.... It couldn't have been the same burd. Wee Chinese woman.... Mid 30s...looked as though she worked for insurance folk... But hey... I'd do it with a few drinks in me.
Inside : an undecorated student flat
Clearly had a person from another flat coordinator... So whatever.
The massage : she asked if I wanted hard or soft... Asked for hard.... I've felt my mum do itsy bitsy spider on my back harder... Thank fuck I only asked for 30mins.....i nearly fell asleep because I was lying face down on a relatively comfy bed.... But squeaked more than Tom banging jerry in the outtakes.
Turn over..... Now.... I swear to God.... If u want to haggle.... Make sure they are Chinese.... They always break lol. Skye wanted 30 for HE. I said 15....She was like no..... 30 and I'll take my clothes off and choke your chic. I said 20.....Skye said 25....i said right I'm heading home. She was like yes OK 20....but jeans on. She shat it when I gave her the classic 'get your pants off' look. She did... So 50 in total for a 45 min massage with HE.
The HE:
to describe it... It was like someone putting a flesh light on a drill on full power.... With the lubrication of a baby cow being fed milk by hard.....
I'm not kidding I lasted about 30 secs of this. She was doing the odd moan and was actually enthusiastic tbf. When I came she smiled and got the toilet roll out. Wiped me super clean. She was pointing at my computer saying 'babies' while laughing. Nearly shat myself... So just grabbed the tissue and finished myself.
She seemed quite pleased and I got dressed. Said in going home for dinner... She said same.... So clearly it was a non used flat.
Left with my hood up and scurried away like a Mexican defector into texts over the trump wall.... Buzzin from the mingingness of the bed.
Got home showered and ready for dinner. All in all.. Weird but neutral. If your a filthy horny cretin.... Do it.
If not.... Go for a real massage and try your luck with the buzz of wsws.
End of review
