Funny mistakes on escort profiles

[Andywb]

Ebonycurves8
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Not so much a mistake but an interesting turn of phrase- this girl has a "pussy as tight as a mouse's ear"

[SayLess]

I've seen quite a few profiles that warn NO BAREBAKE

So avoid these if you were looking for a naked chef to cook you dinner...

[sparkus]

Not on a profile but this week I was asked if I wanted to do it "donkey style"

[Punterperson1971]

Not on a profile but this week I was asked if I wanted to do it "donkey style"

I’d be in ee Orr of you if you manged that

 

[Bonker]

Is that up the ass?

[DastardlyDick]

Saw one yesterday where she mentioned "Inn Calls" - I wonder if that's with her bent over the bar, hopefully not in the Public Lounge!   

Definitely one for the snug, I think! 

[DastardlyDick]

This one isn't quite sure of her ethnicity!

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[mr.bluesky]

This one isn't quite sure of her ethnicity!

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Am I missing something here  she says on her profile Hungarian,  can't see any  ethnicity  mentioned

[SayLess]

Ebonycurves8
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Not so much a mistake but an interesting turn of phrase- this girl has a "pussy as tight as a mouse's ear"

And I imagine her pussy would be wetter than an otter's pocket...
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[daviemac]

This one isn't quite sure of her ethnicity!

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You've posted the app version, doesn't work on desktops.

[DastardlyDick]

You've posted the app version, doesn't work on desktops.

Bugger!
Thank you Davie.
In one of those pics, she's obviously caucasian, but in the other as black as the proverbial

[Coriniumstud]

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Profile looks dodgy as hell but I’d like to see this beachfront apartment in Banbury.  Must be about as far from the sea as you can get in the UK.



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Wanted to meet little miss dotty External Link/Members Only
But she couldn’t make it and recommended Kinky Shaz but can’t find anything about her apart from this, so I’ll give her a miss

[Bum Lovin Criminal]

Well, at least we can appreciate her honesty and save us punters from a wasted trip..



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[PheasantPlucker]

Just imagine how difficult it would be to actually find this one! 

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Bristol, Leeds, Wombley or Sudburi...which is it love? 

And I'm guessing you're hardly a vergy...

-=pp=-

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[daviemac]

Just imagine how difficult it would be to actually find this one! 

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Bristol, Leeds, Wombley or Sudburi...which is it love? 

And I'm guessing you're hardly a vergy...

-=pp=-

It doesn't look as if you've been able to find any escorts, is there a reason for your lack of reviews over the last couple of years.

BTW I bet her English is better than your Romanian,

[PilotMan]

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[Bum Lovin Criminal]

With the Conservatives in trouble after the sacking of 'Cruella,'...Finally, a policy we can all gladly....get Behind!....





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[mandy18]

This girl says she lives in an apartment by Northampton Undergound, How old is she?, it hasnt been used since 1934.

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[mr.bluesky]

This girl says she lives in an apartment by Northampton Undergound, How old is she?, it hasnt been used since 1934.

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  I think I would be more concerned that every photo she has on her profile appears to be a different lady on every one 

[mr.bluesky]

This girl says she lives in an apartment by Northampton Undergound, How old is she?, it hasnt been used since 1934.

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That was an April fools story , Northampton has never had an underground train system 

[Blackpool Rock]

That was an April fools story , Northampton has never had an underground train system 

It's only had electric for about 10 years 

[StingRay]

It's only had electric for about 10 years 

Sounds like cobblers to me! 

[mr.bluesky]

It's only had electric for about 10 years 

But they still use horse and carts 

[Watts.E.Dunn]

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Have a look at this bit of northampton, it shows the Rugger ground then rotate it around slowley;!...

[mr.bluesky]

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Have a look at this bit of northampton, it shows the Rugger ground then rotate it around slowley;!...

It is the famous Northampton lift tower. It was designed to test lifts. No longer in use. Blackpool may have its tower and Paris has the Eiffel tower but Northampton has its famous lift tower  If you get lost looking for the Rugby ground just aim straight for the lift tower. ( or am I missing something,  there is not a naked lady flashing her tits out of a window is there  )

[da26]

English-samantha must have been a high flyer… 22yo and been working as a teacher for 10 years! Evidently you must start work early up North.

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[Bonker]

I think I looked at this profile a few days ago and her stated age was 45.
Maybe she is disprossic and gets her age and IQ mixed up.

[pbrown355]

If you think Northampton is in the north you need to get out more.

[Blackpool Rock]

This girl in Preston has an "Elastic Hymen" 

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[StingRay]

If you think Northampton is in the north you need to get out more.

Yep, agreed - cobblers as Northamton qualifies NOT oop north as below Watford Gap, the UNESCO accepted North/South divide! 

[Steely Dan]

Yep, agreed - cobblers as Northamton qualifies NOT oop north as below Watford Gap, the UNESCO accepted North/South divide! 

The original joke was Watford, not Watford Gap.  To a Londoner, north of the London ring road is North.  And Watford is on the M25.

Changing it to Watford Gap is a Ret Con, or False etymology.

[PilotMan]

If you think Northampton is in the north you need to get out more.

She says she was:"living up North" on her profile

[pbrown355]

Which implies she should get out more too.

[jamiekinkxxx]

The original joke was Watford, not Watford Gap.  To a Londoner, north of the London ring road is North.  And Watford is on the M25.

Changing it to Watford Gap is a Ret Con, or False etymology.

...technically Watford is S of the M25 

[catweazle]

There's a VS advert for a Teesside SP which states  she is working in Stockholm on Tees.  (Probably  autocorrect, but should check  before going live)

[magpie252]

Just had a Thai offer me Deep Thought for an extra £20
I'm considering my options

[jamiekinkxxx]

Just had a Thai offer me Deep Thought for an extra £20
I'm considering my options

 

Don't think too hard! 

[Bertiebeenthere]

Just had a Thai offer me Deep Thought for an extra £20
I'm considering my options


Shouldn't it be £42?

[Thephoenix]

Don't think too hard! 

.......It damages yer brain, 'Arry!

[Heph]

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 '...born & bread' crops up with depressing frequency in the poorer sort of profiles, but the one goes on to new highs/lows

[StingRay]

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 '...born & bread' crops up with depressing frequency in the poorer sort of profiles, but the one goes on to new highs/lows

I lost count! 

Note to self: avoid Blackburn - I recall that there are supposedly 4,000 holes there!
Note to self² - look up where Blackburn is (suspect it's North of Watford Gap)

[versace]

Only £1 for 15 mins with these munters.

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[Punterperson1971]

Only £1 for 15 mins with these munters.

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Surely someone has enquired about the £1 deal 😂

[mr.bluesky]

Only £1 for 15 mins with these munters.

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Looks like they have now changed it to £100.

[Massagetugga]

Actually quite young compared to some of the Thai’s out there 

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[diver ted]

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It's the four hour option for me!

[mandy18]

Ill have an hour if I can pay by Cheque

[Henry767]

I think this Colombian girl's publicist could have chosen a better name...

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[mandy18]

Leila Nobre, new Genuine Teen in the City (Aged 28)
 
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[robsmith149]

Q. Real pictures?  A. Yes of course 100%! You can live if I am not the same person in the pictures .

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