Ratings for Birmingham Parlours

[Westney]

Given that hotels and B&B's get rated according to location, facilities, friendliness, service etc, from 5 star to 1 star. What would you consider to be the 5 star massage parlour in Birmingham at the moment. Stars to be given for UK based girls, conditions, conviviality, services, cleanliness. I'll start the ball rolling and give Manyana, in Selly Oak, 3 stars, for UK girls, not so much the conditions...which are decidedly in need of a refurbishment. If any of you have seen 'Four in a Bed', the programme on Channel Four about people rating eachothers B&B's, you will get the idea. Marks to be taken off for finding a stray pubic hair or a sperm stain on a sheet..and so forth, could be fun!

[megaman]

I can give a rating too one The garden of Eden I give This one a poor rating,

It is clean 5/5

Value for money shit 2/5 it's the most expensive parlour in brum. At your service is by far the best at only £35 its half the money.

The services and the girls poor 2/5 sure some of the girls look nice but that is not enough I've had better times with ugly girls at cheaper parlours. It's a rushed service.

Is it popular well I have done a little investigation being bord out of my head and nothing to do I have parked up a few times and just watched people go in. Almost 2h maybe longer no1 went in. The funny thing is with this parlour is people well follow each other in and I'm sure people have followed me in. I swear it's clear or people are walking past
Noone is going in so I go in then not long after some other punter has gone in.

I only know about this one and stars before I found better ones on here so had no choice but to go there.
What more can I say about this parlour well unless you're a van damme lookalike fit sexy and young then your going too be rushed. No message first when asked and they have tried many times too make me pop by hand at the start. It was a complete joke the last time I was already hard from being wanked but she carried on with hard wanking and  me pop I was in five fucking mins. Piss poor service could not get any worse.
I have a bit of a speech problem so they think I'm nervous and a easy target too take the piss with, I have walked out of that place loads feeling like crap.
So too get the best service at the garden of Eden first you need too be a sexy young hunk and not show any weakness or disability's you may have or they well take the piss for sure. 1 bitch even told me she don't like me anyway because I'm too old.  I wish I started at another parlour but that's too late now.
Overall crap 3/10

[wolves lad]

Odd ball reply...!

If so bad why have you been in loads as you put it, sitting outside stalking the venue too 

No offence mate but something doesn't seem right.

[Diehard]

Birmingham doesn't have a decent parlour, all are shit.

Leicester is better.

[megaman]

Birmingham doesn't have a decent parlour, all are shit.

Leicester is better.

I know but that one is only 5mins by car from me in fact I could just walk up there in 15min, when I started I only know about a few. I made 1 huge mistake by telling them that I'm a V. Big mistake but lesson learned.
They well treat you like shit anyway if your about 40 it's all about them enjoying them selfs with younger guys in there 20s and men they like. They are robbing bastard's too cutting my time short and everything. I keeped going too try and make the next punt better then the last. I'm so annoyed I may park my car across the door way😠 I don't think that would help tho.

[webpunter]

Libra would have scored relatively highly.  With a 10/10 for being open very late

[bunny84]

Garden of Eden has average looking women . They have a woman in their website called Kelsey. She's not worked there once that I know of . I check their Twitter page

[Westney]

To be honest, I've never tried Garden of Eden, and Libra was closed under a great deal of publicity. Leicester, I'd never considered, but is too far for me, I'd like to concentrate on local parlours in Birmingham, of which there are many, of course. We should also take into consideration the type of men that enter these establishments, one working girl in Manyana said that the majority of their visitors were elderly Muslim men, which doesn't bode well, she said their personal hygiene is quite appalling.

[Cantgetenough]

To be honest, I've never tried Garden of Eden, and Libra was closed under a great deal of publicity. Leicester, I'd never considered, but is too far for me, I'd like to concentrate on local parlours in Birmingham, of which there are many, of course. We should also take into consideration the type of men that enter these establishments, one working girl in Manyana said that the majority of their visitors were elderly Muslim men, which doesn't bode well, she said their personal hygiene is quite appalling.

Yes, I must say that I, too, had heard about this hygiene problem with (some) Asian blokes.

[legendinho]

Yes, I must say that I, too, had heard about this hygiene problem with (some) Asian blokes.

 

they will say what ever you want to hear 

[Cantgetenough]

they will say what ever you want to hear 

It is not what I "wanted to hear", actually.

[mikexxlong]

whenever there was a post punt "chat" with the pro$$ie
be it at a brothel, 'independent' or FBSM

a common topic that came up was  the whore  bitching about bad punters  particularly asians and  'blacks'
typically regarding their  aggressive attitude and poor hygiene!

[wolves lad]

I know someone who's connected to a place in brum and their best customers are the 100's of local taxi drivers..!

[Stapler]

I know someone who's connected to a place in brum and their best customers are the 100's of local taxi drivers..!

I bet they haggle! 

[Dellboy]

I bet they haggle!

Before I discovered UKP taxi drivers were my best source for finding a parlour in a strange town.

[legendinho]

When did this thread become like off topic   

best to keep off topic where it supposed to be.   

[Westney]

When did this thread become like off topic   

best to keep off topic where it supposed to be.   

Indeed!

[Stapler]

When did this thread become like off topic   

When you posted this :

they will say what ever you want to hear

[BlueRock]

Over the years I have been in and punted or looked at what's on offer and walked out of a few parlours in Birmingham. Blue belle suite, blue ice, first class, erotic studio, Katie and friends and Libra. Venues are generally shit even Libra the lighting was shit and not enough showers. Had a few decent ladies but most now are EE and just crap. Best avoided and as for entrance fees don't get me started.

[megaman]

Talking about massage parlours again has any1 ever took or asked about taking there own condons in  for more pops basically?
And some ones I've been too there's no option for extras but erotic studios there is or i hope so I'm going there soon, not next month but the 1 after I think. I'm not going to be able too have sex none stop for 30mins I really need the extras and some wgs getting extras is trying too get blood out of stone. Blue belle suite is another £65 for basis only I think and
That makes 3 massage parlours I know of that are £65, them parlours are not talked about much on here that could be why. The places I've been are shit because I haven't had extras.
I feel robbed by some of parlours and I'm not happy about it but I do have some sort of plan tho and well be more prepared.
I have recorded 25mins of music on my phone so that well be a rough guide of the time and wot song to orgasm on. My song of choice don't be afraid by Aaron hall. most places I've been there's no clocks and there's no music or the music stops. Muisc on my phone is going too be important as I don't have a clue about times and some of the girls have noticed that. that said how do the lady's know too as they don't wear a watch and no clocks and music too in the rooms, and I don't think they have some sort of time mapped out in there heads. my small clock is going in too if i beleave a girl could be a probelm.
If I go too a new parlour I we not do this I we have some trust at first.
My other plan so not too get robbed of time is too go for about 15mins max or 10min at the least without sex, sex should not be rushed and I have taken this on board from another punter.
Don't know how I'm going to do that tho if no extras but I want too spend more time with the girl. I have a few ideas and things I like too try with the girls so I get more time.
 I also want too note that I don't always get a massage too and thats funny being that they are massage parlours, I know you dont just go for a massage but they should be warming you up with a massage instead of just cock wanking right away.
I also believe it doesn't matter about the price at some of them massage parlours, you may think paying more money like £65 well get you a better service but it's not always the case.
However the massage parlour at your service I do worry abit about that one, being so cheap it's going too be less forgiving and they can really take the piss if they wanted too. That's only £35 if it was any cheaper they would only be letting the fit brokes in. I have been too that one only a few times and there is a few issues there. There's a older girl there who I believe is a working girl who was moody and horrible with me from the off and last time she was a bit of a cow with me again. She was unavailable too I could not even pick her. I have heard theres extras in that place too but you need too ask I guess.
It's all down too the girls tho you can pick wot ever parlour you want but its the girls that count.

[Dellboy]

Is this just a rant?

[bunny84]

Haha . £65 is nothing to me and I'm not the most loaded person on the planet

On a more serious note take a look at Kesley who's on the top of the girls working at garden of Eden . She's not worked there a single night.  Blaggers

[megaman]

Haha . £65 is nothing to me and I'm not the most loaded person on the planet

On a more serious note take a look at Kesley who's on the top of the girls working at garden of Eden . She's not worked there a single night.  Blaggers

I see her and I don't like that back side in the 1st and 2nd photo lol, most of them don't even work there. I don't think they keep there sites updated you know. If you take a look at sexy stars your see some nice 19 years that don't work there too. O my days  they ant fooling any1