have only just found this forum recently so, have spent the last few days reading up on escorts that i have already booked with. I've been punting for around 16 months now, with an average of one booking per month. I'll be reviewing other escorts that i've met too, but i probably wont bother with anyone who doesnt need my reviews. For example, i met Lily Hart last month and to no ones surprise, she was incredible. Another glowing review wont change anyones life.
A negative review however, deserves to be aired. Just so people can read it and go in with their eyes wide open or, just avoid the wg altogether.
So here goes.....
COMMS
Found myself at home and horny on a sunday evening in early January so, had to trawl through my AW hotlist. Unfortunatley, i met a dead end with all of them. They were all either unavailable or working outside of London. So, after a bit more of a search, I found 'E'. All the boxes were being ticked: Petite, big tits, fit, firm and a great gfe. Her profile was decent and the pics were very appealing. And all of this for £120. "Lets do this", i thought. Comms were quick ands simple, address was given and i made my way to the location.
I live in East London so the location turned out to be a good 40 minute drive away, which annoyed me a little. I normally take the tube to punts and dont like too long a journey (post punt, i just want to get home asap). That's not her fault, obviously.
The booking
The apartment was extremely spacious, well decorated and very clean. Infact, of all the punts i've had, i think that was the best looking location i had been to.
Anyway, once i'm in i get a chance to get a good look at E. As stated in her profile, she is tiny. I'm no giant but, with her standing at 4'7, i felt like i was towering over her. She was dressed smartly: white shirt, black knee-length skirt and some heels. From her pictures, you can tell she is a short blonde with massive tits. Although she had a shirt on, you could tell she was very, very busty and the fact that i couldn't see any cleavage just yet wierdly added a bit of mystique to her.
On her profile it states that she is 31 years old, she looked much older than that. I would say probably late 30's. I'm 32 and she looked older than me. Hard paper round?
Anyway, once i'm in, i'm offered a seat on the comfy sofa and some wine. She's very bright and chatty, making an effort to get to know and make me feel at ease. We pour the wine and she brings over some crisps and green olives and tells me to help myself. I was being royally spoilt and we hadn't even got to the sex yet. E made it clear that she was in no hurry and that, while i had booked for an hour, she wanted to take time for us to get to know, rather than the 'Hello,wallop,goodbye' method. I was ok with that up to a certain extent, its always nice to ease into a booking, as long as she didn't go on too much.
But on and on and on she went. I pretty much learned everything about her as she jumped from one monologue to another. I would try to change the subject into something that would lead to some sort of physical intimacy. At one point, i even took the money out and gave it to her to sort of indirectly say "come on, love. Lets get to fucking." I didn't though, of course. I didn't want to rock the boat and ruin the light atmosphere. During this whole bit, she rolled herself a joint and smoked it next to me. She asked me if this was ok, for some reason i said it was, even though i dont normally like that sort of smell/taste on a woman, but maybe i was just curious. I don't know. I don't think it made a huge change to her demeanour or performance.
After a fucking age, we managed to lock lips on the sofa (light fk) and when i wanted to continue and let it lead further, she turned away and told me to take it easy and theres no rush. I had already been there for 40 odd minutes, i had work the next day, i think a bit of haste wouldn't be the worst thing.
We eventually moved to the bedroom, i didnt need a shower as i had one right before leaving. Instead of kissing, groping and gradually undressing each other, she just started undressing and insisted i do too. All of a sudden, we were skipping gears. This is normally one of my favourite bit of the punt: the slow reveal, the build up.
What was revealed though was not a 31 year old body. Her breasts were huge, no doubt about that, but they were soft and saggy. To go with that, she had stretch marks on her stomach and further below. All her claims of having a personal trainer and being in tip-top shape felt like bullshit.
The first round started with owo as i reached over and stroked her back and butt. The technique was nothing spectacular but it seemed to do the trick, i came pretty soonish. We didn't take any breaks from there, thankfully. I was still hard and ready to carry on so a little more foreplay for the next few minutes and i was ready for the condom. We did mish first, she wasnt the tightest but she was very energetic and made me sound like i was fucking huge (i think i'm average). She would lock her legs around me to make me go deeper, which i liked. I just wasn't getting any real sensation though. We went to doggy and then cowgirl. This was where the state of her tits really was an issue. They sagged and as she bounced, she had to hold them in place. We went back to Mish and i started losing my hard-on, because the sensation was missing and quite frankly, i was bored.
I didn't cum, probably didnt want to. We called it a night soon after. From there she wanted to go back into the living room and chat more. Jeez. I swiftly finished my drink and got going. Just before i stepped out of the door, she pulled me in for a big kiss and had a good feel of my cock.
Thats more like it! Where was that for the 2hours and 15 minutes i was there? Thats right, i was in there for that amount of time. I instantly knew she only did that to make me leave on a high and think "wow, that was fucking awesome".
I had been fighting over whether this review should be a negative or a neutral. I know she laid on drinks and snacks and was the perfect host. She always came across as a nice lady. But i wasn't there for all that. If i wanted a drink and pack of crisps, i would've gone to the pub. It was very nice of her, but i was there to fuck. Lets cut all the crap and get to it.
The lies about her age and body sealed it on a negative for me. I hope this hasn't come across as too harsh, i just needed to get this off my chest.
Would i recommend her? No, there's plenty of escorts out there at £120 and there are some mind-blowing ones if you pay £10-£30 more.
Aaaaannnnd breathe.....
