Funny mistakes on escort profiles

[The Owl]

With the amount of non-British escorts on AW it's inevitable that writing in a 2nd language is going to result in some mistakes.

Here's some I found on 1 profile:

TOYS AND FITTINGS
ANAL RIVING
CUM IN MOUSE.

I sure hope the last one is a spelling mistake. 

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Have you spotted some howlers?

[Colston36]

Since quite a few of us aren't  too literate - the "should of" brigade - don't laugh too loudly.

[Kelgon85]

Never forget there was one that had her age listed at 127.

[Grenadier36]

Whilst I might be a bit of a cunt I've never had "pussy in my fingers" or even a "tough cock" 

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[peestee]

as I am not native English speaker it should not be me who does comment here, but there are some gems for sure.

I SPEACK VERY GOOD ENGLISH.
I AM PASSIONAL
I AM NOT RACCIST
MASAAGE

[Kieslowski]

I've seen a few women put this - the first time I saw it I thought it was a typo, but after I saw a few more do it, I realised it was probably down to how vowels are pronounced in certain languages, and shows why you shouldn't try to spell words in a foreign language phonetically:

"HI GAYS"

[Kerosene]

Pick a name for yourself. One that suggests a discreet meeting.

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[Punter S Thompson]

Since quite a few of us aren't  too literate - the "should of" brigade - don't laugh too loudly.

"Should have".
Sorry, couldn't resist.

[Stevelondon]

"Should have".
Sorry, couldn't resist.

Bugger.
Beat me to it. 

[advent2016]

With the amount of non-British escorts on AW it's inevitable that writing in a 2nd language is going to result in some mistakes.

Here's some I found on 1 profile:

TOYS AND FITTINGS
ANAL RIVING
CUM IN MOUSE.

I sure hope the last one is a spelling mistake. 

External Link/Members Only

Have you spotted some howlers?

Screenshots would be nice

[Vice Admiral]

Since quite a few of us aren't  too literate - the "should of" brigade - don't laugh too loudly.

"Should have".
Sorry, couldn't resist.

Bugger.
Beat me to it.

Am I missing something here?

Colston wrote “should of” as an example of a common error made by those whose English is not always top-of-the-range.  And he made it extra-clear that he was indeed giving an example by putting the words in inverted commas.

So I’m puzzled by the replies I have quoted above.

Or – as I said at the start – am I missing something?

[versace]

Screenshots would be nice

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[Bum Lovin Criminal]

Most of the funny one's appear on Viva.

At least this Rom is honest..



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[versace]

Most of the funny one's appear on Viva.

At least this Rom is honest..



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[Stevelondon]

Brilliant 😂😂😂

Then again. Dreams coming true might be “Essra bby”

[Bum Lovin Criminal]

If you think punting while Black couldn't get any harder..

You should definitely avoid this one..



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[versace]

Brilliant 😂😂😂

Then again. Dreams coming true might be “Essra bby”

 

[Tender.french.kiss]

So I’m puzzled by the replies I have quoted above.

Me too.
At best read too fast before responding.
At worst part of the said brigade.

[JontyR]

If you think punting while Black couldn't get any harder..

You should definitely avoid this one..



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Oh that made me laugh. Thank you .

[mr.bluesky]

If you think punting while Black couldn't get any harder..

You should definitely avoid this one..



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If that's her true photograph I think I could forgive her poor spelling.

[hairdownthere]

If you think punting while Black couldn't get any harder..

You should definitely avoid this one..



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Brilliant!!!

[Bum Lovin Criminal]

I bet this escort had a very, very dusty phone..





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[mr.bluesky]

I bet this escort had a very, very dusty phone..





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Only appealed to farmers 

[Tender.french.kiss]

I bet this escort had a very, very dusty phone..


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Not sure, actually quite the opposite, would attract all those interested in making bacon

[Bonker]

Only the rasher punter.
Oh dear, how low have I sunk.

[Dynasty89]

This one has her age listed as 122

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[JontyR]

Only the rasher punter.
Oh dear, how low have I sunk.

You're only scratching the surface.

[Maverick1138]

I immediately lost my erection when I read what her name was. Cant imagine call that out while fucking her, I think the anti terrorist brigade will be called out.

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[Punterperson1971]

I immediately lost my erection when I read what her name was. Cant imagine call that out while fucking her, I think the anti terrorist brigade will be called out.

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[Blackpool Rock]

I bet this escort had a very, very dusty phone..





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We've all fucked the occasional pig 

[pythondan]

Saw this on a girls AW profile

Q. Where are you from ?   

A. Im originally coming from Poland however I've been living in the UK for 15 years so there will be no issue with understanding eachoter xx

[theejaculator]

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Don't forget to clean your arsehole....this one's working from Rimington Spa....

Should read Leamington spa

[Waterhouse]

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Rimington Spa....

How about a special weekend “Spa” break?
 

[Thephoenix]

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This lady says she likes to shoot contents and sell them???

I like to shoot my contents, but don't think I'd get much interest on eBay.

[Plan R]

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Says

♥♥♥ NOT AVAILABLE ♥♥♥

In big letters at the top of the profile - pretty sure that's meant to say NOW available
 

[Spunky34]

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A great location.




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[big-al93]

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Says

♥♥♥ NOT AVAILABLE ♥♥♥

In big letters at the top of the profile - pretty sure that's meant to say NOW available
 

Not so sure you are right. No phone number displayed, No availability calendar displayed. Not logged in for almost a week.
Sounds like not taking bookings at the moment, and making it clear on the profile. Maybe on holiday at the moment, time of the month or whatever.

[Dr Talueng]

Not really a 'funny thing' as such, more a lack of attention to detail ... this one goes back quite a few years, and I can't even remember who it was now ... the profile said the usual 'new in town' and 'very close to the railway station' - in a town which didn't have a railway station.

[versace]

Not really a 'funny thing' as such, more a lack of attention to detail ... this one goes back quite a few years, and I can't even remember who it was now ... the profile said the usual 'new in town' and 'very close to the railway station' - in a town which didn't have a railway station.

 

[Bum Lovin Criminal]

This one's either going all out to win this years 'Bake off',

or making a real mess of bagging up her 'product'..

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[limarasa9]

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“friendly room is waiting for you”

At least you can have a chat with the friendly room if not the girl 

[mr.bluesky]

This one's either going all out to win this years 'Bake off',

or making a real mess of bagging up her 'product'..

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Wouldn't be Columbian marching powder would it 

[Bum Lovin Criminal]

Wouldn't be Columbian marching powder would it 

I don't think so.  The poor girl's taking a nap on the table now.   Bake Off's changed, She'll lose a few points for that..



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[mr.bluesky]

I don't think so.  The poor girl's taking a nap on the table now.   Bake Off's changed, She'll lose a few points for that..



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If bake off was like that  I would start watching it. 

[Bum Lovin Criminal]

With the amount of non-British escorts on AW it's inevitable that writing in a 2nd language is going to result in some mistakes.

Here's some I found on 1 profile:

TOYS AND FITTINGS
ANAL RIVING
CUM IN MOUSE.

I sure hope the last one is a spelling mistake. 

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Have you spotted some howlers?

Actually Mr TO, I don't think it was a spelling mistake.

I've just found out who her flat mate is..



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[akauya]

This one's either going all out to win this years 'Bake off',

or making a real mess of bagging up her 'product'..

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That profile must have been written by Sergei because the is no such nationality as "Columbian" - I don't think any Colombian girl would not know how to spell her nationality 

[pythondan]

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The most sensitive part of my anatomy is?   Naples

[norwichfunseeker]

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[theaccountant]

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Haha, I can be threatening when in work mode. Though I like to have a good work/life/punting balance

[Vice Admiral]

We've all heard of the so-called Girlfriend Experience – and I suppose Robinson Crusoe role-play might include a Girl Friday Experience – but a "passionate girl Fried experiance" is a new one on me.

I might try it sometime.

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