Scrutiny on AdultWork services list and interviews

[Cuntminion]

Bit of fun this one hopefully

Just put what you generally read on aw and how it translates to you and your cynical mind


Do you smoke? Socially or offers smoking fetish = I smoke like fuck if it can be worked in somehow I'll be happier than gizmo in a race car


I'm half (enter country) half Romanian= all Romanian


Bubbly = large

Princess = arsehol

Age: = u was this age once if I was born on a leap year technically I'd be telling the truth

[Spunky34]

"Curvy" : large
"Busty" : large
"Classy" or "high class": deluded
"I have been told I give the best blow job ever":  gullible
"Sophisticated": will talk the hind leg off a donkey
"Naughty but nice":  mostly nice, not naughty
"Mature": you can probably add 15 years to the age I quote
"I have been told my photos don't do me justice" : because they only show you the least bad bits
"Will try anything once":  but only once.  Has probably tried whatever you want to do before and found that she doesn't really like it so won't do it again.

[vw]

Blonde - Bleached

Redhead - Died

Pink Eyes - Last punter shot his load in them

[Roth]

Escort - prostitute 
Masseuse giving HE only - prostitute
High Class Courtesan - fucking expensive prostitute

High Class or High Quality - charges more but average service.

[rg41]

Escort - prostitute 
Masseuse giving HE only - prostitute
High Class Courtesan - fucking expensive prostitute

High Class or High Quality - charges more but average service.

That is very true

[Tiger63]

Blonde=thick
Drinks socially= mortal when you turn up
Book early to avoid dissapointment = no booking for the past 6 weeks.
Can hold a conversation= witters on for hours
Squirter= cant control bladder
Speaks 5 different languages = non of them English.

[Spunky34]

"I am a successful businesswoman with a busy life and don't have time for relationships" : yeah, you're basically Michelle Mone, aren't you?

"I won't show my face because discretion is important to me, but I promise you won't be disappointed" : You are probably a munter, but you have astutely judged that when we meet, I will probably shag anything with a pulse

[Blackpool Rock]

This is a genuine profile = This is a fake profile
My photos are real = Yeah but of someone else
I really love my job = I really love the money but not what I have to do to get it

[vw]

Available from 9am - Bullshit sets alarm for 9am and rolls over.

[yorkshire123]

Brand new to escorting milf = I've stopped for a month to pop out another kid

Can dress quite young = Mutton dressed as lamb

Bi-curious = You can fuck off if you think I'm licking any pussy

I do not answer withheld numbers = Unless my phone is dusty

I have a nice body = Ugly as fuck

100% genuine independent escort  = Pimped

[Just Some Bloke]

In your town: Fake profile PG selling scam, I don't actually know what town I'm being advertised in.

[Sir Lance-a-lot]

English = Romanian

Exotic = Romanian (unless black, then it means English).

Has "anal" in her AW name = Romanian, doesn't do anal.

Has "hott" in her AW name = Romanian, frigid.

Teen = mid-twenties.

Young = mid-thirties.

[Neal69]

This thread is funny.

[Silver Birch]

Party girl = Gonna be off my fucking head, and bring extra cash so you can buy some gear off me too

[Spunky34]

"Do you smoke?  Socially" : and I bet you're a VERY social person

[vw]

As Seen On Muppets Guide - I was suckered into giving an old guy a freebie for a good review

[Timmy2]

As Seen On Muppets Guide - I was suckered into giving an old guy a freebie for a good review

Ha Ha...nice one

Raddy

[Blackpool Rock]

Large natural breasts = Big saggy tits