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Author Topic: You know you're a punter when...  (Read 242376 times)

Hyborean

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Inspired by another thread on being addicted to punting I thought I would start a light-hearted one!

You know you're a punter when:

At a party you silently make a hotlist and decide how much you would pay per hour for each one.

Offline Corus Boy


Inspired by another thread on being addicted to punting I thought I would start a light-hearted one!

You know you're a punter when:

At a party you silently make a hotlist and decide how much you would pay per hour for each one.


You don't bother going to the party because you know that with one phone call you can get everything you want from the party by trading money against effort!

potato

  • Guest
When you walk round with a smug grin on your face all time..

You know women's dress and bra sizes sizes better than your wife..

DaveMugabe

  • Guest
You wonder whether you would do any woman you see.  Oh! Thats just being a bloke, sorry.

Punter Girl

  • Guest

dilettante

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You see a gorgeous girl in the street and think, "Didn't I screw your sister last week?"

DaveMugabe

  • Guest
You see a gorgeous girl in the street and think, "Didn't I screw your sister last week?"
unfortunately the uglier one usually  in my case!

Offline pdq

you pick up things other guys who you work with say, and think yup you are a punter


Rochdull lad

  • Guest
. . . you see your mates out with their wives [specially when you're my age] and you think, "You guys should see the last woman I was in bed with!" :yahoo:

Jason

  • Guest
You know you are a punter:
1. When you associate tube stations with WGs names.
2. When amongst your most frequently visited websites there are escort related websites.
3. When you have a monthly whoring budget.
4. When you know all the local hotels and their prices.
5. When you celebrate the 10, 50, 100, 200 different WG milestones with an outcall overnight.

Offline wristjob

Someone asks how your sex life is and you talk it down.

Ashurnasirpal

  • Guest
You see a client at work and think "You could make so much more money on your back"

DaveMugabe

  • Guest
you pick up things other guys who you work with say, and think yup you are a punter
Soooooo true

Offline pdq

Someone asks how your sex life is and you talk it down.

love this one

Offline Hormann

1. You have expert opinion on interior design of most new build flat developments in your area
2. You can easily get a huge variety of different shower types to work at the right temperature, well almost.
3. You get a slight hint of a semi taking money out of the cashpoint (ok it may be just me)

Offline Silver Birch

3. You get a slight hint of a semi taking money out of the cashpoint (ok it may be just me)

 :lol: :lol: :lol:

Offline Ali Katt

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You analyse women and have an almost sixth-sense as to whether they would be a good shag or not.

When I was younger there were women I fancied, now I look at it in terms of whether they would actually be any good in bed.

Offline jaydefo24

1. You make purchase decisions based on their comparability to punting... "£80 for some new shoes? ... for £10 more I could spend half an hour with an absolute hottie, think I'll leave the shoes".

2. You find yourself defending prostitution when it arises but try not to let on how much you know about it.

Jvosta

  • Guest
When you walk past hot civvies and think to yourself "how much?"

Offline tom269u001

You look at the number of cash withdrawals on your bank statements and think "Fuck"!

Mr Bronco

  • Guest

When you browse Adult Work and make a mental list on who you're going to bang on payday.

When you go out with your friends to an expensive club thinking "I could of shagged a nice hot chick for an hour than spend the night getting rejected by ugly girls for the same price"


Offline Jimmyredcab

When you look at the checkout girl in Tesco and decide what you would pay her.    :sarcastic:

Rochdull lad

  • Guest
leave a Meeting [which is part of your non-punting life] with people who don't punt and one of them says, "I don't like this part of town; that [pointing] is a Brothel".

And it's somewhere you've been!! :scare:  Or maybe  :yahoo:

Persie

  • Guest
Soooooo true
I must be missing a sixth sense - what sort of things do they say?

Persie

  • Guest
when any place in London is always associated with a hooker you have seen

yourgent

  • Guest
Walking in the supermarket you rate all women by:
Wouldn't touch 'em
Would fuck 'em
Would pay to fuck 'em

Offline Kriss

When you estimate how many times you'd have to take a women you've just met, and much you'd have to spend on her before she would let you fuck her, and calculate how much cheaper it would be to book an overnighter with a hot pro$$ie?  :unknown:
Banned reason: Bullshitting troll
Banned by: daviemac

Persie

  • Guest
When you estimate how many times you'd have to take a women you've just met, and much you'd have to spend on her before she would let you fuck her, and calculate how much cheaper it would be to book an overnighter with a hot pro$$ie?  :unknown:

lol...thats a proper cost benefit analysis and the reality is that a hooker will always be bet


Persie

  • Guest
you are dating a few girls and you decide which you actually prefer based upon the rates they could charge if a WG  :music:

Offline Kriss

Walking in the supermarket you rate all women by:
Wouldn't touch 'em
Would fuck 'em
Would pay to fuck 'em

Similar, but because I'd fuck just about any grown-up woman with a pulse, I rate them from 'if she was free' to £200 or higher. On a good day in Morrison's, I might get two in the latter category  :cool:
Banned reason: Bullshitting troll
Banned by: daviemac

Persie

  • Guest
Similar, but because I'd fuck just about any grown-up woman with a pulse, I rate them from 'if she was free' to £200 or higher. On a good day in Morrison's, I might get two in the latter category  :cool:

Try waitrose  :drinks:

Knick

  • Guest
When dating a civvie you work out how much you've paid in presents & dinners per fuck.

Offline adindas

Eating p*s*y is already part of your diet , lol .....  :rose:

Offline sumertime

.... you walk into a hotel and look how easy it is to find the lift without being noticed by receptionists.

Some years ago [before punting] I used to think how to get out of a hotel if there was a fire.. now I think how can I get in when I am on "fire"!!

Offline Daffodil

When dating a civvie you work out how much you've paid in presents & dinners per fuck.

I'm terrible for doing this. Hooked up with an ex a few months ago, just got myself a handjob off her. I was going to negative her on here  :D

rottweiler75

  • Guest
Similar, but because I'd fuck just about any grown-up woman with a pulse, I rate them from 'if she was free' to £200 or higher. On a good day in Morrison's, I might get two in the latter category  :cool:

limiting yourself somewhat unnecessarily in my opinion.
pulses should be.. optional          :drinks:

Offline adindas

Eating p*s*y is already part of your diet , lol .....  :rose:

Reciprocally you know you are a prossie if eating special sausages is already part of your diet ...

Timo

  • Guest
When you expect owo, cim, ro, 69 etc with a civvy five minutes after meeting her.

Offline Gynaemyte


"All ready and waiting" email reply from a very young, naive female work colleague and I know that all she wanted was just an reply to a previous query.
Love the neighboroughly Dad's remark about his daughtler studying at "O" and "A" levels - can't wait for her to do a Degree in Astrophysics - Black Holes (not my bag), zero gravity ("I was walking on air") - Vanilla icecream always raises a smlie as does punting on the River Thames at Oxford - maybe you have others?
Gm

Offline maxxblue

"All ready and waiting" email reply from a very young, naive female work colleague and I know that all she wanted was just an reply to a previous query.
Love the neighboroughly Dad's remark about his daughtler studying at "O" and "A" levels - can't wait for her to do a Degree in Astrophysics - Black Holes (not my bag), zero gravity ("I was walking on air") - Vanilla icecream always raises a smlie as does punting on the River Thames at Oxford - maybe you have others?
Gm

Two questions:

(1) Why the fuck have you bumped a thread that is two years old?

(2) Are you under the influence of some mind-bending drugs, because you are talking a complete load of bollocks?

 :hi:

Offline Kriss

Eating p*s*y is already part of your diet , lol .....  :rose:


Especially if you're talking about "5 a day"  :cool:
Banned reason: Bullshitting troll
Banned by: daviemac

Offline Nagilum

When you wanted to tell the self proclaimed office stud that you have bedded more women then he could imagine.

ickydicky

  • Guest
you go and pay a hoor to suck and fuck you :drinks: and look forward to a few  :drinks: afterwards as much as you look forward to the punt :scare:

E.L. Wisty

  • Guest
You never get response from WG and your time is wasted when booking that is agreed, never goes ahead.

Offline stevedave

When you wanted to tell the self proclaimed office stud that you have bedded more women then he could imagine.

This is so true, especially when you know a lot of them are a hell of a lot better than he'd have pulled! And probably cost less in the grand scheme of things  :cool:

Offline Nagilum

This is so true, especially when you know a lot of them are a hell of a lot better than he'd have pulled! And probably cost less in the grand scheme of things  :cool:

The frustration!  ;)  :drinks:

Offline howrude

This is so true, especially when you know a lot of them are a hell of a lot better than he'd have pulled! And probably cost less in the grand scheme of things  :cool:
I know the feeling only too well.
« Last Edit: August 12, 2016, 11:58:24 pm by howrude »

Bootleg

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When seemingly random collections of letters on number plates can make you chuckle uncontrollably - e.g. OWO, DFK, PSE etc.

Offline BP96

When mid thrust you're thinking about what you will write in your review. Curvy or slim with curves?