Have traces of oil/lipstick/scent ever caused you a problem later?

[Titti Tatti]

As far as I know I'm not under suspicion and not everywhere offers a shower after.

Is this risky?


I often have a shower when I get home so I'm more woried about first impressions or evidence on clothes etc.

[Silver Birch]

1. I always expect a shower afterwards.

2. My clothes are always off before any evidence can be transferred. 

My biggest concern is picking up any traces of cigarettes on my clothing.

[ciderhead]

Not really but I once shagged a non prossie in a field and when I was getting undressed at home I had muddy knees, thankfully I managed turn quickly enough that the Mrs didn't see

[Fredbone]

I am that issue one. I was a party and one lady have very strong perfume, which the other half spotted.  Only reason I could give was it was from someone in the pub, giving kisses and hugs.  Not sure it was 100% delived.

[np500]

O h and I don't get that close , hence the punting thing going on ! Did come home off one of my early punts, told o h when asked , where I'd been told her drink with mate, she replied, he didn't notice your t-shirts inside out then ! ( Just a black t-shirt ) left my coat on , trust me, ha ha , I jokingly replied, not made that mistake again .

[Monsieur69]

I have a very hairy back. If a masseuse uses Johnson's Baby Oil the hair goes into knots which can only be removed by cutting them or pulling them off ( ouch ). She should be using proper oil anyhow such as nut or avocado. Baby oil is cheap and nasty and gives you spots apart from knotting the hairs. My OH noticed knotted hairs on my back after a fbsm session and ( thinking quickly! ) said "it must be the cheap liquid soap they provide at the gym" I now check and if necessary pull them off.

[hullad]

No, never a problem thus far .

What I have noticed is most of the ladies wear little to no perfume and certainly no heavy stuff that lingers. Lipstick could be a problem especially around the 'big fella', but as 'er in doors' no longer visits him she is not going to see it.   

I always get a shower on the punt ir certainly on my return home, its no problem I get showered and changed two or three times a day at times.

[cueball]

Yes, one lass had strong perfume that ended up in my tee shirt, it reaked, I stashed the tee shirt for a few days until the the smell has diminished then wore it to work, fine then, all good when it smells of sweat and my work.

Was a close call and taught me to request no perfume on all meets.

That were easy, I've had much much more difficult close calls that took some real ingenuity to hide, but that's not for an open forum 

[blackburnian]

Yes, one lass had strong perfume that ended up in my tee shirt, it reaked, I stashed the tee shirt for a few days until the the smell has diminished then wore it to work, fine then, all good when it smells of sweat and my work.

Was a close call and taught me to request no perfume on all meets.

That were easy, I've had much much more difficult close calls that took some real ingenuity to hide, but that's not for an open forum 

I've had similar , now I try to keep a spare t shirt and a jumper in the car , pop that on pre punt and then change back .

Bb

[AgedCases]

I had an incall last Friday and requested the escort to wear bright red lipstick. I spent two hours snogging her face off only to leave without realising I'd have lipstick all over my mouth.

Had some funny looks from folk on the buses home!

[raylondoner]

Cigarette smoke must be the most difficult to hide since it's in your hair as well as clothes and you can no longer claim it's because you popped into the pub for a quick one (?) on the way home 

[Titti Tatti]

Cigarette smoke must be the most difficult to hide since it's in your hair as well as clothes and you can no longer claim it's because you popped into the pub for a quick one (?) on the way home 

Oh the irony if I were to be accused of smelling of smoke!

A couple of you have mentioned this.  Does she have a post coital fag?  I'm not aware of having been with a fag ash Lil, but my sense of smell is not the strongest so it's good to  know more. Thanks.

[raylondoner]

Oh the irony if I were to be accused of smelling of smoke!

A couple of you have mentioned this.  Does she have a post coital fag?  I'm not aware of having been with a fag ash Lil, but my sense of smell is not the strongest so it's good to  know more. Thanks.

You could still be asked to explain, irony or not (I couldn't give a fuck) - girl may not smoke in front of you, but the smell can still lurk.

[Silver Birch]

A couple of you have mentioned this.  Does she have a post coital fag?  I'm not aware of having been with a fag ash Lil, but my sense of smell is not the strongest so it's good to  know more. Thanks.

On my very first punt I had to wait in a room where 2 other wgs were smoking. I was green and naive, I should have left as soon as I saw they were going to light up. I have removed a couple of wgs from my hotlist when I read reviews that said the venue was a bit smoky.

[Hertsgent]

Usually shower when I get home, telling the OH I've had a sweaty day (in my office job!) or something similarly attractive 

I agree, not many WGs wear strong scent, so not a huge issue, although I noticed my hair smelled of the WG recently - nice as it reminded me of nuzzling her knockers whilst my head must have been rubbing against her neck 

Always best to take care though and shower at the earliest opportunity - assume the OH has the scent skills of a grizzly bear, and you probably won't go far wrong .....

[Type_O_Negative]

I'm glad i'm single. I like her glitter and perfumes on me 

[raylondoner]

I'm glad i'm single. I like her glitter and perfumes on me 

Same here, I don't shower after as I like to go home with "eau de pussy" on me!   

[MancSean]

Same here, I don't shower after as I like to go home with "eau de pussy" on me!   

I agree too I always ask for perfume to be worn don't like lipstick though as it can stain clothes. I am an ex smoker and am ok with smell of smoke in the flat doesn't bother me.
When I was in a relationship though I became very careful about showers as my ex was a suspicious person so I always would take same brand of shower gel and deodorant on a punt. However, if it was an evening punt I would only soap up my nob post punt and face cos she would wonder why I smely so fresh late in the evening,

[Type_O_Negative]

Same here, I don't shower after as I like to go home with "eau de pussy" on me!   

It's so relaxing when you don't have to worry about your wife or girlfriend while coming back home from punting 

[threechilliman]

Cigarette smoke must be the most difficult to hide since it's in your hair as well as clothes and you can no longer claim it's because you popped into the pub for a quick one (?) on the way home 

Yeah, that's a biggy for me and would be a reason to walk.

tcm

[Titti Tatti]

Still something of a newbie at this game and keen to 'improve my game' and learn from others mistakes!

So people have spare deodorant and shower gel and changes of clothes in what, their Car? Gym bag?

Does anyone take a toothbrush and paste with them?  I'm very keen on DFK and anything I can do to make my breath fresher will surely increase my chances with that?

I'm still paranoid about where to hide the Punting phone.

[webpunter]

A possibility - join a gym & leave in your car.  Make sure that the OH knows its there

So people have spare deodorant and shower gel and changes of clothes in what, their Car? Gym bag?

Fresh breath will help.  Best not to clean your teeth within an hour or two of the booking.  As this opens up your gums.  Perhaps not so important with DFK but a must if you like RO.  Clean teeth like 2 hours or so b4 & then use mouthwash

Does anyone take a toothbrush and paste with them?  I'm very keen on DFK and anything I can do to make my breath fresher will surely increase my chances with that?

Plenty of threads on this

I'm still paranoid about where to hide the Punting phone.

[AgedCases]

Still something of a newbie at this game and keen to 'improve my game' and learn from others mistakes!

So people have spare deodorant and shower gel and changes of clothes in what, their Car? Gym bag?

Does anyone take a toothbrush and paste with them?  I'm very keen on DFK and anything I can do to make my breath fresher will surely increase my chances with that?

I'm still paranoid about where to hide the Punting phone.

I carry deodorant, shower gel, aftershave, mouthwash and a packet of extra strong mints in what I call my punting bag. It's one of those bags that comes with a deodorant set.

Might be a good Xmas gift idea for you.

[webpunter]

A couple of years ago there was a post on some thread about a punter realising on way home that he smelt of perfume.  Not a possibility for the punter to do anything about it b4 arriving home to the OH.  He stopped at a petrol station & splashed some fuel over himself whilst filling up [with a supposed splash back etc].  On getting home the OH went mental saying that he'd make the house reek of petrol.  Told him to get undressed there & then & she'd put the whole lot in the washing m/c.  And to have a bath / shower.  Laughed my tits off.  Quick thinking 

[Titti Tatti]

Call me paranoid

but OH borrows my car from time to time.

Dread to think that she's gets a puncture and some kindly soul shows her where the spare wheel is!

Mints are a decent idea but I've been against them for years!   Do buy a pack of Polo when I remember and ditch them before I get home. Extra strong a no no.

[webpunter]

When tyres need changing get some run-flats.  Buy her a car - might be cheaper than divorce !

Dread to think that she's gets a puncture and some kindly soul shows her where the spare wheel is!

Don't be a jessy

Mints are a decent idea but I've been against them for years!   Do buy a pack of Polo when I remember and ditch them before I get home. Extra strong a no no.

[Noman]

After a session at Annabelle's in Milton Keynes, I drove back home to London and when my wife saw me she remarked that I smelled of coriander - which must have been from the scent of whoever it was I'd seen. I replied that I'd had a sandwich which had lots of coriander in it. She didn't question me any further, which surprised me hugely!

[webpunter]

After a session at Annabelle's in Milton Keynes, I drove back home to London and when my wife saw me she remarked that I smelled of coriander - which must have been from the scent of whoever it was I'd seen. I replied that I'd had a sandwich which had lots of coriander in it. She didn't question me any further, which surprised me hugely!

Just be careful - she might not have been taken in by your explanation.  Or will think about it again.  Quick thinking

[Horizontal pleasures]

Cigarette smoke must be the most difficult to hide since it's in your hair as well as clothes and you can no longer claim it's because you popped into the pub for a quick one (?) on the way home 

+1
I have often thought of this.

I keep my own deodorant in the car and even use it sometimes when not punting - when needed - so it does not draw any attention.

I recently walked along the street with my wife behind a man who was smoking and she remarked on the smell. Next time my clothes pong of smoke from a punt location which was smoky I shall use this as an excuse. But I ALWAYS request please no smoke or perfume when making punting arrangements. Wise ladies know why.

I would love to try a Thai massage place near home but the smell of the oils worries me as even a shower might not remove them and smelling of a strange shower soap would be noticed.

[webpunter]

I would love to try a Thai massage place near home but the smell of the oils worries me as even a shower might not remove them and smelling of a strange shower soap would be noticed.

Take up swimming.  Then a while later go to the thai place & then swimming afterwards.  You'll smell of chlorine afterwards - even with a shower.  If the place is any good then keep up with swimming.  If not then bin it

[Horizontal pleasures]

haha, I have a well known fear of water ever since they failed to teach me to swim at school and nearly drowned me.

[Noman]

Just be careful - she might not have been taken in by your explanation.  Or will think about it again.  Quick thinking

It was 18 months ago and she's not mentioned it since so I think I'm in the clear...

[Gordon Bennett]

Virtually every lady I've booked has not worn perfume or (much) make-up so the issue of me getting tainted has never arisen. I only book older ladies so I have not got a yardstick but maybe the older ones are more comfortable in their skin and body-confident so don't feel need to get tarted up? On the other hand maybe it's the young 'uns who like the orange fake tan, trowelled on makeup and ponging of scent?

[CoolTiger]

A couple of years ago there was a post on some thread about a punter realising on way home that he smelt of perfume.  Not a possibility for the punter to do anything about it b4 arriving home to the OH.  He stopped at a petrol station & splashed some fuel over himself whilst filling up [with a supposed splash back etc].  On getting home the OH went mental saying that he'd make the house reek of petrol.  Told him to get undressed there & then & she'd put the whole lot in the washing m/c.  And to have a bath / shower.  Laughed my tits off.  Quick thinking 

In extreme cases where showers, etc not working, after a punt stop and fill up fuel, and accidentally "spill" a few drops of petrol/diesel over your hands/clothes to hide any lingering perfume smell. That smell will mask anything and upon returning home, your OH will make you throw all your clothes in the laundry bin and insist you get a shower.

 


This was the thread....
https://www.ukpunting.com/index.php?topic=26453.0

[Elmer.fudd]

On my first punt i forgot to wash my face in the shower and was sitting at home thinking i was dreaming i could still smell the lovely lady - then realised i had gone down on her and given her a huge orgasm. Made me remember my youth when i used to go home sniffing my fingers just for the hell of it! 

[webpunter]

 


This was the thread....
https://www.ukpunting.com/index.php?topic=26453.0

Well remembered Sir

[mh]

I had oil once during a massage that even with a shower was a sod to shift.

But my nearest miss was bits off a new pink fluffy towel in my pubes and arse crack that I only just noticed in time. Sometimes having a shower is the worst option...!

The other problem I had once was a very long black hair that I found at the end of a day after a punt, caught up in my keks.

[CoolTiger]

Well remembered Sir

 

[CoolTiger]

I had oil once during a massage that even with a shower was a sod to shift.

But my nearest miss was bits off a new pink fluffy towel in my pubes and arse crack that I only just noticed in time. Sometimes having a shower is the worst option...!

The other problem I had once was a very long black hair that I found at the end of a day after a punt, caught up in my keks.

I've had a long, blonde hair stuck in my pants when I once got home 

Always check when putting your trousers back on after a punt, or upon returning home and then removing your trousers/pants.

[Sparta Prada]

Not sure if it's me being paranoid but I find that using normal soaps and gels are sometimes not enough to disguise the smell of a woman. What I tend to do after a punt is smear a little bit of diesel from my car fuel cap onto my chin and fingers to fully disguise any possible pussy scents. You can also say that you have been filling up the motor if your OH asks why you smell of fuel.

[webpunter]

Eau de fanny batter is a bit different - sure OHs are programmed to pick up on this.  Judging by the amount of punting you do the OH must think you are accident prone     

Lap dancers tend to chuck the perfume on which is always a risk - although i've long since given up on this waste of time & money

Not sure if it's me being paranoid but I find that using normal soaps and gels are sometimes not enough to disguise the smell of a woman. What I tend to do after a punt is smear a little bit of diesel from my car fuel cap onto my chin and fingers to fully disguise any possible pussy scents. You can also say that you have been filling up the motor if your OH asks why you smell of fuel.

[Neal69]

Long Hairs 

Found one in the bath the following day 

N

[raylondoner]

Not sure if it's me being paranoid but I find that using normal soaps and gels are sometimes not enough to disguise the smell of a woman. What I tend to do after a punt is smear a little bit of diesel from my car fuel cap onto my chin and fingers to fully disguise any possible pussy scents. You can also say that you have been filling up the motor if your OH asks why you smell of fuel.

Will totally fuck up your face if done too often, but I suppose this is the lesser of 2 evils! 

[threechilliman]

Long Hairs 

Found one in the bath the following day 

N

I found one wrapped around my cock whilst having a bath the following morning once and the colour meant it couldn't have been a 'domestic'. FUUUUUUUCK!!

tcm

[agent47]

Long Hairs 

Found one in the bath the following day 

N

  Fortunately im single but recently i had two long strands of blonde hair on a t shirt i was wearing from a punt the day before when my mum and her sister popped around and almost straight away they said '' ooo you've got blonde hairs on you have you got a secret little girlfriend have you'' don't know why but on the inside i was freaking out so just laughed nervously. I swear it's like women have an almost supernatural ability to spotting things like this, it can't be because they're suspicious of everything can it  

[threechilliman]

Not sure if it's me being paranoid but I find that using normal soaps and gels are sometimes not enough to disguise the smell of a woman. What I tend to do after a punt is smear a little bit of diesel from my car fuel cap onto my chin and fingers to fully disguise any possible pussy scents. You can also say that you have been filling up the motor if your OH asks why you smell of fuel.

I have dry skin, so carry a tube of moisturising cream with me that's pretty wiffy just in case I need an emergency disguise. Works a treat.

tcm

[Fredbone]

Same issue, but very long red ones and on my shirt from work, which the other half spotted.  But at least I could name the lady from work and offer her number, such detail closed down the issue. 

But would have loved the hear the call, as my other half asks the training lady why I came home with three foot long red hair.

[Malvolio]

Those hairs get everywhere - easy to pick one up on your clothing as you discard it onto a chair.

[s8s849]

I found a long black hair in my underwear the other month from a punt. Lucky I spotted it but then needed to dispose of it! Put it in the black bin outside. Glad I spotted it and not her when doing the washing!!

My current dilemma is that I have lost my punting SIM card and the little Apple pin thing for removing the sim from the phone. I keep them together in a little wrap, but haven't a clue where it has gone. 

[The Outsider]

My current dilemma is that I have lost my punting SIM card and the little Apple pin thing for removing the sim from the phone. I keep them together in a little wrap, but haven't a clue where it has gone. 

Your wife has found it!