Oh that is soooo fucking tempting!
"Hello Bank Manager, I'd like to present my business case for a business loan please."
"Dear Dept for Small Business Innovation I'd like to apply for funding support of a new business."
"Hello Kickstarters, I need to raise funds for my new massage parlour. Different funding levels will receive different amounts of free massage credits. Stretch goals will include luxury showers and wet rooms, luxury massage couches, Thai massage rooms with overhead handrails, onsite eco-laundry facilities, members lounge where you will be hosted by the available massage therapists before and after treatments."
