hilarious reports from punters

[the pussy man]

found this page where someone has reposted funny quotes from %%% reviews...

there's some class on there...

for instance

This girl has gone seriously downhill. She arrived high on crack or whatever shit she takes and proceeded to give an interesting show. More bizarre than sexy. shoved stained knickers in cunt then dragged them out, bannana up arse then peeled with mouth and offered to me ( didn’t touch it ) fisted herself till she bled slightly and attempted that thai trick with a beer bottle. The girl is meant to hold the liquid inside then squirt into the bottle. she just drenched the bed and smashed the bottle when it fell from her pussy ( next time do this before fisting? ) then she ran out of steam and spent the rest of the time teling me she had three kids and was dying of cancer.

check it out if you're keen on a laugh 

[the pussy man]

here's some more...

I began to fumble with her bra strap, whereupon she rolled away from me, falling off the bed and hitting the floor with a fearful thump.

or perhaps

Poor BJ with lots of teeth began proceedings and this was actually quite uncomfortable so asked her to stop. Then used my hand to get myself hard and put on a condom and fucked her inb missionary. Now this is where things got really uncomfortable as she passed out as I was doing this, and looked fast asleep. I stopped straight away and woke her up and then she started shouting at me in Thai. She went to the bathroom and took a glass pipe and was smoking something out of it. I asked her what she was doing and she told me to wait a minute.

[Corus Boy]

Hilarious - No

Scarey - Yes

IMO

[Gordo987]

      

[Sailormack]

A classic case of when to walk 

[JB1969]

Rofl, why, why, why... she would be out the door so fast she wouldnt even feel her arse hitting the pavement