Can’t get hard

[bardock]

I’m 28 years old , just had a bad experience today couldn’t stay hard, last punt was 2 yesrs ago same thing happened
I get hard for 2 mins the. Get soft and that’s it
But with porn this never happens so it’s not erectile dysfunction
The lady was extremely pretty too !
Note this was only the 3rd time I’ve had sex ever

[Beebuoy]

Happened to me twice on punts. The advice I've been given is quite good but hard to follow; STOP WANKING.

[Logamimo]

I’m 28 years old , just had a bad experience today couldn’t stay hard, last punt was 2 yesrs ago same thing happened
I get hard for 2 mins the. Get soft and that’s it
But with porn this never happens so it’s not erectile dysfunction
The lady was extremely pretty too !
Note this was only the 3rd time I’ve had sex ever

This problem happened to me some years ago and I detect in the tone of your post that you are suffering from anxiety, which is caused by stress. My soluotion was that I stopped punting for a while because the more you fail to maintain an erection in the situation the worse the situation will become. I cured the problem by learning how to relax both physically and mentally. Physical relaxation can be achieved through a technique called progressive relaxation, which is a form of yoga (Google it) Mental relaxation can be achieved through meditation, which will calm the mind as well. This dual approach will work but it will take time. The important thing is not to worry about it because it happens to many men of all ages. It worried me but I applied the two techniques I've outlined and eventually the old chap started to perform again. The underlying problem is performance anxiety so give yourself a break and learn to relax. I would guess that there are probably other stress related problems in you life as well. Hope this helps. 

[bardock]

Thanks I think it’s anxiety too as it only happened once I saw her , 5 mins before she came I was completely normal

[Bertbart]

Viagra.
There's no doubt a reason that you're not able to stay barred up but if a bluey can cure the problem fire one down before a  punt see if that cures it. Assuming there is no rmedical reason you can't take it.

[satyromaniac]

Taking viagra at your age is not advisable.
Especially if you can get hard whilst wanking.
This sounds like an anxiety issue. Not an erectile dysfunction issue.
Reduce the amount of wanking you do, especially a day or two before you punt.
Just try to relax and remember that you are there to enjoy yourself. Try and see a WG that loves giving slow sloppy blow jobs. Then you can just sit back relax and enjoy them sucking on your nob 

[scutty brown]

stop drinking
stop smoking
lose weight
get fit
sort your head out: stop worrying
try picking up normal girls and see how you get on: sounds like you have an anxiety problem which stops you relating to women

[B4bcock]

Note this was only the 3rd time I’ve had sex ever


If virtually all of your orgasms are achieved through wanking over porn (esp. videos) after time your brain sets itself to assume that is the norm.   When you then try to have real life sex it doesn't seem right as you don't have the same control over the situation and failure results.    As mentioned, this will then set up anxiety issues which compound the whole thing.

Google "erectile dysfunction and porn addiction" and you will find plenty of advice.   It seems to be a big problem in the States, especially with younger men who have grown up with easy access to hi-def graphic videos.   I used to feel a bit frustated with the grainy black and white photos in Titbits and Health and Efficiency mags I used to wank over, but it may have done me a favour in the long run!

The important thing to keep in mind is that it will cure itself, but may take a bit of time.

[scutty brown]

If you're aged 28, only had sex three times and only with prossies then you've got some kind of deeper mental issue you need to resolve. Whats stopping you having normal relationships with women?
You've got to ask yourself.....
are you gay?
do women scare you?
is there something about you that puts women off?

[Metalgear2018]

Exercise and a sexy escort will do the trick.

[Doc Holliday]

Lots of good advice above although you haven't actually said to what degree you are using porn? I agree porn can desensitise your mental stimulus but personally I'm not convinced the associated masturbation in itself is detrimental especially at 28?

Given your age and if your solo erections are good, then there is unlikely to be any underlying organic cause and it is, as discussed, anxiety related. I assume alcohol is playing no part also?

Meds will likely assist you but I agree that at your age you should avoid as you run the risk of dependency. It won't overcome the anxiety just compound it.

Also you didn't say how the session progressed after you lost your erection? Did you proceed to orgasm or abandon?

[Doc Holliday]

Also you didn't say how the session progressed after you lost your erection? Did you proceed to orgasm or abandon?

Apologies I have just read this https://www.ukpunting.com/index.php?topic=243160.msg2492019#msg2492019 and your reports

[king tarzan]

Viagra has given me sinus infection...
But cleared up now...

What I've been doing lately

2 lady pink apples
2 oranges
Two bananas
After 15 mins
1 can of sugar free red bull 355ml

Then about 90 minutes later 1 small Viagra pill
( No choice but to chance it just incase as I don't want to waste £150+.. HORRIBLE THOUGHT )


Then about 70 minutes later with the hottie dfk and starts to rise slowly and then in about a minute is rock hard..
Easily gets two powerful shots out in hour..
I get home shower and go to sleep and it gets up very hard again...
Lasts till after noon next day....
No way max 6 hours Viagra lasts...
This mixture for me lasts double that time..

I've experimented 3 times and absolutely perfect..

[scutty brown]

Viagra has given me sinus infection...
But cleared up now...

What I've been doing lately

2 lady pink apples
2 oranges
Two bananas
After 15 mins
1 can of sugar free red bull 355ml

Then about 90 minutes later 1 small Viagra pill
( No choice but to chance it just incase as I don't want to waste £150+.. HORRIBLE THOUGHT )


Then about 70 minutes later with the hottie dfk and starts to rise slowly and then in about a minute is rock hard..
Easily gets two powerful shots out in hour..
I get home shower and go to sleep and it gets up very hard again...
Lasts till after noon next day....
No way max 6 hours Viagra lasts...
This mixture for me lasts double that time..

I've experimented 3 times and absolutely perfect..

So the bananas are in case you can't get hard? Don't the girls notice?

[king tarzan]

So the bananas are in case you can't get hard? Don't the girls notice?

Joke beside the point..
This method works for me..
Obviously body to body there would be different reactions.
For myself thankfully 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏 very happily positive.

[scutty brown]

Joke beside the point..
This method works for me..
Obviously body to body there would be different reactions.
For myself thankfully 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏 very happily positive.

Bananaman in the Jungle
External Link/Members Only

[Ali Katt]

As I've said elsewhere I gave up wanking last year, sometimes I relapse, but I honestly don't enjoy it. Porn is incredibly boring if your hands aren't down your pants. It sounds like anxiety related to me, he says the girl was pretty, it sounds like he thinks he wasn't good enough for her.

[bardock]

If you're aged 28, only had sex three times and only with prossies then you've got some kind of deeper mental issue you need to resolve. Whats stopping you having normal relationships with women?
You've got to ask yourself.....
are you gay?
do women scare you?
is there something about you that puts women off?

I’m not that good looking , I do have trouble communicating (autism ?) and I do have anxiety in certain situations.

Also During the OWO I got hard for about 1 minute and then I started thinking about the gonorrhea / herpes /etc , also I felt her teeth and I just couldn’t remain hard

[bardock]

Lots of good advice above although you haven't actually said to what degree you are using porn? I agree porn can desensitise your mental stimulus but personally I'm not convinced the associated masturbation in itself is detrimental especially at 28?

Given your age and if your solo erections are good, then there is unlikely to be any underlying organic cause and it is, as discussed, anxiety related. I assume alcohol is playing no part also?

Meds will likely assist you but I agree that at your age you should avoid as you run the risk of dependency. It won't overcome the anxiety just compound it.

Also you didn't say how the session progressed after you lost your erection? Did you proceed to orgasm or abandon?

No it was a 1 hour session I told her to leave after like 15 minutes and stepped into the shower straight away lol ,and I haven’t masturbated

[bardock]

Also what was putting me off was that on her profile pictures on AW there was no tattoos , and in person she had many tattoos so my anxiety kicked in and I thought it was a different woman , so anxiety kicked in . And I associate people with lots of tattoos as being drug users so I assumed there was a higher chance of her carrying diseases lol

[Doc Holliday]

Also what was putting me off was that on her profile pictures on AW there was no tattoos , and in person she had many tattoos so my anxiety kicked in and I thought it was a different woman , so anxiety kicked in . And I associate people with lots of tattoos as being drug users so I assumed there was a higher chance of her carrying diseases lol

You are overthinking it ... hardly surprising having now read through your posts and 'nervous virgin' history.

You should not be looking at £250/h providers given your issues. Start simple.

I would suggest you try a recommended more mature 30+ experienced specialist massage and HE provider. Get used to relaxing and having your cock manually stimulated to test your erections and orgasms. No health risks, no pressure (no teeth!) just concentrate on your own 'tactile' pleasure. Forget nationalities, ass play, anal etc that can always come later.

Having said avoid meds you may ultimately need their help, although if you have an irrational fear of catching something your still doomed 

Just one thing puzzling me though in April 2016 you said you were 23 but now you are 28? Was that an adultwork age? 

[Ali Katt]

I’m not that good looking , I do have trouble communicating (autism ?) and I do have anxiety in certain situations.

Also During the OWO I got hard for about 1 minute and then I started thinking about the gonorrhea / herpes /etc , also I felt her teeth and I just couldn’t remain hard

How do you know you are not good looking? It may sound like a stupid question, but has anybody told you so outside of a school playground?

If you are squeamish punting isn't for you simple as. I've had menstrual blood in my mouth, not by choice, I've had my spunk in my eye (also no by choice), I've had a girls squirt into my mouth, I've cut my cock on a girl's teeth. It's not for the faint of heart, but luckily I love messy sex. If stuff like that scares you knock it on the head. Sorry.

Do you know for a fact you have autism? Or is it speculation? If you do have it so fucking what - So does Mark Zuckerberg although he is mild on the spectrum and he invented a social network - don't be the victim. I know you might want a cuddle, but seriously you won't get one from me.

I have anxiety everytime I see an escort. I have anxiety everytime I talk to girl. I have anxiety if on the rare occasion I need to speak up in a meeting or perform at work. Do you know how I got over it? I didn't, I just don't acknowledge I speak my mind and don't think about stupid shit like whether what I say is in some way valid. Fuck me if I can't communicate what chance have I got if I am doing some D\s roleplay and there is trust involved? As the saying goes shape up or ship out.

[saxophone]

Sounds like we're in the same boat, with anxiety and a poor dating track record... and boner issues.

You say it's not erectile dysfunction because you can get hard with porn, but that only rules out physical ED. Porn-induced erectile dysfunction is psychological. Sex doesn't give the same sensory stimulation you're used to: your own hand, and pics/video.

To re-sensitise yourself to real sex, you better sexually starve yourself for a while. Whether you go for total abstinence or just reduce the amount of porn/wanking is your choice.

I don't want to depend on it but viagra works for me. If you want, order some from a proper UK online pharmacy. You still need to get over the desensitisation if you want it to be worth it.

[Doc Holliday]

How do you know you are not good looking? It may sound like a stupid question, but has anybody told you so outside of a school playground?

If you are squeamish punting isn't for you simple as. I've had menstrual blood in my mouth, not by choice, I've had my spunk in my eye (also no by choice), I've had a girls squirt into my mouth, I've cut my cock on a girl's teeth. It's not for the faint of heart, but luckily I love messy sex. If stuff like that scares you knock it on the head. Sorry.

Do you know for a fact you have autism? Or is it speculation? If you do have it so fucking what - So does Mark Zuckerberg although he is mild on the spectrum and he invented a social network - don't be the victim. I know you might want a cuddle, but seriously you won't get one from me.

I have anxiety everytime I see an escort. I have anxiety everytime I talk to girl. I have anxiety if on the rare occasion I need to speak up in a meeting or perform at work. Do you know how I got over it? I didn't, I just don't acknowledge I speak my mind and don't think about stupid shit like whether what I say is in some way valid. Fuck me if I can't communicate what chance have I got if I am doing some D\s roleplay and there is trust involved? As the saying goes shape up or ship out.

I'm glad your not my stress counsellor 
All perfectly valid points though.

[Ali Katt]

I'm glad your not my stress counsellor 
All perfectly valid points though.

I tell people what they don't want to hear. How can somebody learn if they are told everything they do is perfect?

[Lalalaveets]

I’m 28 years old , just had a bad experience today couldn’t stay hard, last punt was 2 yesrs ago same thing happened
I get hard for 2 mins the. Get soft and that’s it
But with porn this never happens so it’s not erectile dysfunction
The lady was extremely pretty too !
Note this was only the 3rd time I’ve had sex ever

cause; TOOO MUCH PORN

Cure; quit porn and masturbation for a few months. (Wank no more than 3 times a week). And there is a high chance you’ll be cured.

Read up on ED and porn online to find out for yourself

[Ali Katt]

cause; TOOO MUCH PORN

Cure; quit porn and masturbation for a few months. (Wank no more than 3 times a week). And there is a high chance you’ll be cured.

Read up on ED and porn online to find out for yourself

Nah it's more due to anxiety. He's managed to fuck girls before, he's got reviews to prove it, the issue is what's in his head.

[Plan R]

Anxiety.. but...! It might not be performance anxiety as such

I used to get what you describe a lot when I was younger
it was ages till I worked out it was mostly due to fear of wasting 150 quid - not fear of poor performance!

Solution - I started doing much cheaper punts.
Who'd have thought you could be such a tight cunt that you end up with self fulfilling anxiety loop about wasting lots of dosh by not performing ? 

[Doc Holliday]

I tell people what they don't want to hear. How can somebody learn if they are told everything they do is perfect?

I personally wouldn't disagree although many academics would? Indeed that topic is a very interesting separate discussion in itself.

[bardock]

Should I try again with the same WG ?

[HarryZZ]

My first sexual experience was similar, it started well then just went limp, unfortunately I think that experience at 16 scarred my mentally and I avoided the chance of sex for the next year or so, then when drunk and uninhibited I managed it I was alright after that. I had no trouble in the marital bed except if stinking drunk but still enjoyed the odd wank whenI was wanking a bit too much I did have some issues although that in my 50s when the tank was running low I guess anyway, I still have an active sex life with my wife and have absolutely no issues now but I keep my punting to midweek and sort the wife out at the weekends. Strangely I'm up like a shot at home but sometimes need some persuading on a punt.

[bardock]

You are overthinking it ... hardly surprising having now read through your posts and 'nervous virgin' history.

You should not be looking at £250/h providers given your issues. Start simple.

I would suggest you try a recommended more mature 30+ experienced specialist massage and HE provider. Get used to relaxing and having your cock manually stimulated to test your erections and orgasms. No health risks, no pressure (no teeth!) just concentrate on your own 'tactile' pleasure. Forget nationalities, ass play, anal etc that can always come later.

Having said avoid meds you may ultimately need their help, although if you have an irrational fear of catching something your still doomed 

Just one thing puzzling me though in April 2016 you said you were 23 but now you are 28? Was that an adultwork age? 

Well it was £180 an hour but I opted for the extras Anal etc and outcall is more expensive.
But I agree with the stimulation thing , I felt that the blowjob wasn’t stimulating at all  because I’m too used to my hand lol

[Doc Holliday]

As I've said elsewhere I gave up wanking last year, sometimes I relapse, but I honestly don't enjoy it. Porn is incredibly boring if your hands aren't down your pants.

I want to know how people give it up? I've been pretty much a daily wanker from around the age of 11 (probably in every sense of the word since)

Having got over the shock of white gooey stuff eventually appearing, I've never stopped and largely irrespective of any other sexual activity.

[scutty brown]

Should I try again with the same WG ?

no
try again with one who isn't a challenge in the glamour or performance stakes
go with an experienced woman aged 30+ who you don't think you have to impress: you're there for your enjoyment not hers
don't have any preconceived ideas of satisfying her - thats all bollox. You're not there to score points or get graded, and if it doesn't work it  doesn't matter

[Ali Katt]

I want to know how people give it up? I've been pretty much a daily wanker from around the age of 11 (probably in every sense of the word since)

Having got over the shock of white gooey stuff eventually appearing, I've never stopped and largely irrespective of any other sexual activity.

Yep. Me too since about 10\11 I've mentioned this before, but my first orgasms at that time were dry orgasms. It was quite simple for me first is to do 7 days - believe it or not it's not difficult, then it's either 10 or 14 days your choice I would go for two weeks as it's a milestone, then 20 days and which was hardest for me 30 days - usually I would get to around 18-22 days sometimes 28 days. After that you are pretty much good. If you feel frustrated lift weights, watch a non-sexual film, dance around to music - whatever helps you relax. The trick for me was spotting patterns the worst was lying in bed naked in a morning when I'm off work and watching porn on my phone. I know with me and others it is basically browsing the internet on a desktop PC and you look at the sites you want IMDb or whatever and the you get bored and start looking for new porn, plus you could delete movies off your PC. I was hoarding those fuckers. The biggest change was I think and feel more attractive if I don't wank, as you mentioned it is the pasttime of little boys and teenagers; grown men tossing off to porn surrounded by bedroom poppadoms is pretty fucking sad if sex is available.

[Ali Katt]

no
try again with one who isn't a challenge in the glamour or performance stakes
go with an experienced woman aged 30+ who you don't think you have to impress: you're there for your enjoyment not hers
don't have any preconceived ideas of satisfying her - thats all bollox. You're not there to score points or get graded, and if it doesn't work it  doesn't matter

Degraded maybe, but only when he learns how to be a good little bitch.

[Plan R]

I want to know how people give it up? I've been pretty much a daily wanker from around the age of 11 (probably in every sense of the word since)

Me too 13 - 50
I wish I could leave it alone for a month. Since turning 45, I occasionally I manage a week or two - how the fuck blokes in there 20s give up wanking for 12 months I'll never know.
Yes porn is to blame, it depresses me that I use porn.

[Ali Katt]

Me too 13 - 50
I wish I could leave it alone for a month. Since turning 45, I occasionally I manage a week or two - how the fuck blokes in there 20s give up wanking for 12 months I'll never know.
Yes porn is to blame, it depresses me that I use porn.

There's your answer why do something which you don't enjoy and brings misery?

[bardock]

I’m gonna see her again tonight and conquer this anxiety

[Ali Katt]

I’m gonna see her again tonight and conquer this anxiety

Stupid. Madness is doing the same over and over again and expecting a different result as Albert Einstein said.

[scutty brown]

I’m gonna see her again tonight and conquer this anxiety

don't
you'll just be even more frustrated

[Jas1975]

OP why not go have a massage where there is a possible HE?  If she does a good job you will want the HE.....

[CoverMyEyes]

don't
you'll just be even more frustrated

+1

You're already setting yourself up to fail if it is anxiety related. You'll be thinking "hope it works this time".

[B4bcock]

I’m gonna see her again tonight and conquer this anxiety

NO!   STOP!   Wait until monday . . . .  April Fool's Day.

[Ali Katt]

don't
you'll just be even more frustrated

There's been some helpful advice.

Seeing a mature woman for a massage and HE is a good one.

Who the fuck pays £180 in the North West? Loads of good girls at £120 or less.

Anxiety is something which never goes. If he thinks having a shag will turn him into Charlie Big Potatoes he is very much mistaken. It's how people deal with anxiety that counts. I'm sure Jimmy Carr get nervous everytime before goes on TV, it doesn't stop him.

As mentioned he owes nothing to the WG. I've had punts were I've cum in 3 thrusts in a parlour when I was starting out, nothing to be embarrassed about, I didn't book her the next day to make up for it.

Believe me I can relate if somebody told me when I was 20 I would have sex with a girl and would have her OTK or that a girl would beg me to call her a "dirty whore" or even that I'm into what I'm into. I would think it was science fiction.

[Doc Holliday]

Stupid. Madness is doing the same over and over again and expecting a different result as Albert Einstein said.

Its one of those classic punting threads where someone asks for advice which is duly given, then totally ignores it.

[Doc Holliday]

There's your answer why do something which you don't enjoy and brings misery?

That's the problem though I do enjoy it. My only downside/guilt is that it has occupied too many hours of my life, by that I also mean sex generally, even if only cerebral in nature.

Anyway well done to you for achieving it 

[Ali Katt]

Its one of those classic punting threads where someone asks for advice which is duly given, then totally ignores it.

Totally correct Doc. That's assuming he's serious, he's starting to sound like the archetypal wanker he makes himself out to be. I'm so harsh today, anybody would think it was Aries season!

Fuck it I'll tell a story. I had a parlour punt once with Katie who now runs Moulin Rouge. I couldn't keep hard as I was stressed due to redundancies being made at work, it turned out OK in the end, but it was fucking scary. I came by HR in the end, but she was deflated and maybe thought I didn't fancy her, she was cute and good fun, but it was all me. What did I do? Go back the next day to make it up. No, I took a break until I had my finances sorted out and I was in a better state of mind. I shouldn't have been punting.

As I've said before when I was 28 like Mr Badcock if he is 28 or 24, I was even scared to dirty talk to a girl. Anybody who has seen me knows that is my thing; I fucking adore hearing a girl talking all breathy and dreamy when I'm saying absolute filth. Who would have thought it?

[B4bcock]

I’m gonna see her again tonight and conquer this anxiety

Anyone who is given all the sound advice we have posted and then makes a comment like that is just pissing around.

[Ali Katt]

That's the problem though I do enjoy it. My only downside/guilt is that it has occupied too many hours of my life, by that I also mean sex generally, even if only cerebral in nature.

Anyway well done to you for achieving it 

Like I say I do relapse. I've pretty much done everything from edging, to using toys; I still adore magic wands, but would rather use one on someone else, when I was in my late teens I could even suck my own cock. Tried it a few years back and I had pain for days, I could barely stand up!

If you feel it's a waste of time find something else to fill it. It's the only way and go for 7 days to start, it's like quitting any addiction, baby step first and don't beat yourself up for not making just get it right next time.