Rudest thing an SP has ever said to you during a punt

[winkywanky]

It's all very British, I couldn't imagine having this type of banter with some scary Brazilian chick-with-a-dick 

[PreopDollyJTS]

All kissed and made up, perhaps us men are as fickle as you "Girls" 

You’re more a diva than I I’m sure! 

[PreopDollyJTS]

It's all very British, I couldn't imagine having this type of banter with some scary Brazilian chick-with-a-dick 

Its a sign I’m off work with time to kill  all fun n games winkyy

[NickyBobby]

Had a Romanian ask me why I was fat, and then tell me that I should drink less beer before seeing her again

[winkywanky]

Had a Romanian ask me why I was fat, and then tell me that I should drink less beer before seeing her again

That's code for she wants to marry you, but you need to sort yourself out first 

[Blackpool Rock]

Nice one MD

I'm guessing that's Poppy who's now indie on AW?

Yeah i've just happened across her AW profile, now goes under the name Daisy Dreams 

External Link/Members Only or External Link/Members Only

[Hotdogboy88]

Here's one for you then Dolly -

Punter to Dolly - Have you ever been told you look like a man 

Dolly to punter - No have you 

Think you misinterpreted this one dolly. Definitely on your side here making the joke at the punter. 

[Moby Dick]

Yeah i've just happened across her AW profile, now goes under the name Daisy Dreams 

External Link/Members Only or External Link/Members Only

Daisy Daisy
Give me your tits to chew!
I’m half crazy,
I wanna get inside of you.
It won’t be for very long.
Cos you charge a pretty song
But you’ll look sweet
When we repeat
Multiple cumshots that cover you. 

[PreopDollyJTS]

Think you misinterpreted this one dolly. Definitely on your side here making the joke at the punter. 

I knowww looking back properly 

[Blackpool Rock]

I knowww looking back properly 

 

[Blackpool Rock]

My "Joke" was actually ripped off of this scene which was in the film Alien

External Link/Members Only

[Liverpool]

My "Joke" was actually ripped off of this scene which was in the film Alien

External Link/Members Only

Aliens

[oldmanking]

as someone else already said, thai's can be alarmingly open when assessing your body...  i stopped using thai masseurs after a second one spent more time commenting on my size and how i should exercise more, eat better, blah blah, than doing the job she was paid for.  such a wood softener!  i really didn't need to hear about her hubby down stairs also having once been the same size and how she'd sorted him out, did i want him to come up and tell me?  no i bloody well didn't!

[Blackpool Rock]

Aliens

Yes 

[niceguy30!!]

Except alllll punters tell me is how beautiful I am thats why Im still busy at 200/ph
Someones sore cus I laughed at the fact you got called ugly by someone u paid for sex ooooops 

To be fair you do look smoking hot.
Where are you based?

[winkywanky]

To be fair you do look smoking hot.
Where are you based?

For £200/hr (or indeed £100/30mins), on the end of your cock 

[contentguy]

When she's rude in her profile, I'll pass:
Was tempted by:

External Link/Members Only External Link/Members Only

But the warning, on such a short profile:

GUYS - LOOK NO MATTER HOW GOOD YOU THINK YOU ARE IN BED I WILL NOT FUCK YOU FOR FREE, I DONT NEED ? WANT A BOYFRIEND AND I DONT NEED CONTENT SHARE FROM OLD FATTIES WITH SMALL BENT COCKS

Put me off somewhat, to me it just screams that she has disdain for her "clients". 

Guy

[chandlerhandler]

Absolutely ages ago at The Toucan - so it's back a while (start of me dipping my toe into this hobby). The blonde fitty I was going for it with at hell for leather in mish called me a twat for finishing before she did. IIRC after I'd popped she said 'don't fucking stop keep going till I'm done you twat'. 

It wasn't Jessica was it? What a fuck she was!

[Trotter671]

It wasn't Jessica was it? What a fuck she was!

I'll be honest pal - not totally sure, Jessica does ring a bell I'm such a slut!!

[boardyhell]

i had one girl tell me i was so old and that was twenty years ago, she was probably 25 at the time

[DouglasReynholm]

Except alllll punters tell me is how beautiful I am thats why Im still busy at 200/ph

UKP rule 3 https://www.ukpunting.com/index.php?topic=252680.0 clearly states:

UKP is not a Dixons window.

so, no TV offers please.

There's a lot of rude stuff in profiles and we know about them shouting on the phone, that's why I specified during a punt - much more personal.

From the same girl:
"I'm missing my friend's birthday so you be fucking good" which really set the atmosphere up.
Then having listened patiently to her trying to describe the plot of Chitty Chitty Bang Bang (yes!) I was told my conversation was "fucking boring".

I think this one's my favourite so far. Why did she explain the plot of that then?

Reminds me of a punt I had last week actually. I booked this lady: External Link/Members Only  profile clearly says she can accommodate, but when I got round there it was just a Ford Transit, and she told me she was gay. So she was a dick van dyke.

[Liverpool]

I think this one's my favourite so far. Why did she explain the plot of that then?

She had a copy of the book in her room and rather than dig out cliches like 'where you from? Do you like London?' I thought I'd ask about that as it's rare to see a British person with a copy let alone a foreign escort.

[winkywanky]

She had a copy of the book in her room and rather than dig out cliches like 'where you from? Do you like London?' I thought I'd ask about that as it's rare to see a British person with a copy let alone a foreign escort.

She wasn't mistakenly attempting to tell you to give her some clitty clitty bang bang you don't think?

[PD11]

Had a ridiculously good session with a Polish girl.

A week later I went back. Then a couple of days later. Then the next day. Then a day or so later. She eventually opened up the door, rolled her eyes and went 'oh its you'.

[Boristheboy]

The rudest comment I have received is "I'm not putting my mouth on your nipples, they're far too hairy."
I have what I would describe as a slightly lighter than average quantity of chest hair 🙄

[sparkus]

My first time to ever get a soft dick after an all day drinking session (which had never happened until that point i.e. reliably hard regardless of intake) she (French, gorgeous derriére) stormed out the room saying "You men have too much money!"

[Grinder69]

Saw a rom many years ago who sad " Why you come here you not find Girlfrend"

Not sure if she ment as it as it sounded, or was making conversation but was a bit of a put down

[Plan R]

Strugling to perform back in2016 with a very chunky polish SP who looked like Joe Bugner, and she says:
"You are too much hand"  meaning I think you wank too much...

To be fair that was true at the time, but it would also have been fair for me to say something like:
"You are too much cheese burger" 

[sparkus]

Saw a rom many years ago who sad " Why you come here you not find Girlfrend"

Not sure if she ment as it as it sounded, or was making conversation but was a bit of a put down

It's standard insincere WG expression, intended as a compliment e.g. 'Why would a man like you need me, you're obviously boyfriend material' expressed poorly probably due to her English ability.

[mh]

Saw a rom many years ago who sad " Why you come here you not find Girlfrend"

Not sure if she ment as it as it sounded, or was making conversation but was a bit of a put down

Not in the spirit of the thread but on this I had the opposite, and perhaps your Rom meant it that way? "Why are you visiting me, you could easily pick up a girl in a bar". I took it as fake flattery, but she was adamant that I was young, fit and good looking. I was middle aged, relatively fit and for my age I am probably OK looking, but I look my age!!!

[Redpunter]

Maybe not rude but ridiculous a Thai masseuse in her twenties said to me will you be my boyfriend and me at 67 nearly choked. Then for the next ten mins she enthused about how well we were match and how well we get on. This was about my fourth and last visit

[mh]

and last visit

 

[Blackpool Rock]

Maybe not rude but ridiculous a Thai masseuse in her twenties said to me will you be my boyfriend and me at 67 nearly choked. Then for the next ten mins she enthused about how well we were match and how well we get on. This was about my fourth and last visit

I've had a couple of Thais ask if I have a wife or GF, I put this down to friendly chat but having read other posts on here over the years believe it may also be code for do you want a relationship 

That said the relationship would be her still fucking punters while you get to fuck her "For Free" but suddenly your paying all the bills and giving her money to send home to the family, cheaper to punt her as and when you want to than go out with her 

[Doc Holliday]

Strugling to perform back in2016 with a very chunky polish SP who looked like Joe Bugner,

That's not a good mental image 

I've racked my brains but I cannot really think of anything especially rude ever being said to me? I did get a real mouthful from a receptionist once when I walked.

Nearest was a somewhat mature and slightly asthmatic SP, who, a little aggressively, complained about being exhausted. She said. "I cannot carry on, but if I let you come on my face can we get it over with?"

Her face was not her best feature so I gave up and left her to find her inhaler.

[rubric]

Not in the spirit of the thread but on this I had the opposite, and perhaps your Rom meant it that way? "Why are you visiting me, you could easily pick up a girl in a bar". I took it as fake flattery, but she was adamant that I was young, fit and good looking. I was middle aged, relatively fit and for my age I am probably OK looking, but I look my age!!!

Depends on the area I suspect, in Romania its not unusual to see younger girls with older 'prosperous' looking men.

[DouglasReynholm]

Maybe not rude but ridiculous a Thai masseuse in her twenties said to me will you be my boyfriend and me at 67 nearly choked. Then for the next ten mins she enthused about how well we were match and how well we get on. This was about my fourth and last visit

This happened to me, with one of the hottest and priciest girls I ever had. I mentioned I was on Tinder and she laid it on thick about being her boyfriend after the sex and I just chuckled. It was the first visit, I never saw her again - and it was because of that. I am under 67 though.

[winkywanky]

Maybe not rude but ridiculous a Thai masseuse in her twenties said to me will you be my boyfriend and me at 67 nearly choked. Then for the next ten mins she enthused about how well we were match and how well we get on. This was about my fourth and last visit

You might well die a happy man married to her, but of course she'd take ten years off your life and there'd be no money to pass down to your kids    .

[Bonker]

After I'd fucked her:
Do you know about computers?
Yes, some.
Well you can fix mine and don't expect any money because I know it's something simple.
I paid you and you're something simple.
Wot?
Good bye.

[Watts.E.Dunn]

Well never had anything bad said but one local Massage lady said after a "Happy ending " that she thought;

"You cum make too much happy juice, it take me a long time to clean it all up"!"

[winkywanky]

After I'd fucked her:
Do you know about computers?
Yes, some.
Well you can fix mine and don't expect any money because I know it's something simple.
I paid you and you're something simple.
Wot?
Good bye.

Female 'logic'. To a tee.

[PreopDollyJTS]

UKP rule 3 https://www.ukpunting.com/index.php?topic=252680.0 clearly states:

UKP is not a Dixons window.

so, no TV offers please.

Lol was hardly touting or offering services I posted a bitchy comment to a punter here which would lose me work if anything, not like i was licking ass hoping for a booking, can’t help what guys here reply to me soz!!
As i said im off til feb anyway couldn’t care less
Ps my extra large implants are now in 

Hidden Image/Members Only

Hidden Image/Members Only

[winkywanky]

...not like i was licking ass hoping for a booking...

Ah, but do you lick ass during a booking Dolly? And do you like receiving it too?

[winkywanky]

Ps my extra large implants are now in 

Hidden Image/Members Only

I must confess I'm not really a big fan of enormous fake hooters Dolly.

But out of interest, what are those two pink electrode-looking things hanging from your hand?

[PreopDollyJTS]

Ah, but do you lick ass during a booking Dolly? And do you like receiving it too?

Ur the one thats gonna get me banned for being both a bitch n a businesswoman wanky so f off with ur questions wankstain 

[winkywanky]

I'm somewhat concerned about what part of your anatomy you might be attaching them to 

[winkywanky]

Ur the one thats gonna get me banned for being both a bitch n a businesswoman wanky so f off with ur questions wankstain 

 

[PreopDollyJTS]

I must confess I'm not really a big fan of enormous fake hooters Dolly.

But out of interest, what are those two pink electrode-looking things hanging from your hand?

Drains that i have to empty every few hours full of blood to stop me getting infected, n yes its not a look for everyone just like trans is not for everyone but its for me n I love my niche so I couldn’t care less

[Punterperson1971]

I’d love to see Ts dolly she does in my opinion look good and my birthday is February so could be well timed for a birthday treat

[winkywanky]

Drains that i have to empty every few hours full of blood to stop me getting infected, n yes its not a look for everyone just like trans is not for everyone but its for me n I love my niche so I couldn’t care less

Of course, it's your body, and there are plenty guys who like the look. And I hope you are doing it for yourself and not for others, that's not a criticism by the way  .

[PreopDollyJTS]

I’d love to see Ts dolly she does in my opinion look good and my birthday is February so could be well timed for a birthday treat

Thsts sweet but just to clarify I CAN NOT HELP THAT MEN HERE FIND ME ATTRACTIVE ALL I DO IS POST OPINIONS OFTEN IN OPPOSITE DIRECTION TO 90% PUNTERS, N GUYS HERE COMMENT THAT IM ATTRACTIVE I CAN NOT HELP THAT N IT DOES NOT MAKE ME TOUTING!!
(My disclaimer before being banned for nothing  )