Lies we tell

[thekingreturns]

So following on from the lies we get told thread... how about the lies we tell?
WG's -

"You are my first escort"
"Wow you are the most beautiful woman i've ever seen"
"No I've never had someone put a finger in my arse"

GF/Wife etc -

"Just nipping to gym"
"They had samples of this perfume so i got some for you to smell"

Cheers

Kingy

[Jonestown]

I’ve only got £30, here look in my wallet.

No, I dont mind waiting, honestly.

[Happyjose]

No love, I never go on any forums

[Rumpelstiltskin]

My names John / Harry / Tom / Pedro / Sergio or anything else you can think of at the time 

[Winker121]

I see no reason to lie to them.  If they ask about something that you don't want to disclose just tell them that you would rather not say. They probably aren't interested anyway.

[Waterhouse]

I see no reason to lie to them.  If they ask about something that you don't want to disclose just tell them that you would rather not say. They probably aren't interested anyway.

Same here, apart from my real name that is. I've only ever shared that with one escort.

[Fuzzyduck]

"I'm just going for one innocent drink..." 

Any range of complimentary white lies that might improve the vibe and lead to a better punt.

I generally don't disclose what I do or where I live, so I've found it easier to have another career that I can talk about rather than have to think of new shit every time. In the early days I said I was a fireman which seemed to have a positive effect.

I told a reg some years ago it was my birthday and I ended up banging her in the ass for free (it was normally an extra). Happy days. Some time later in another punt we were chatting and she randomly asked me my star sign. I answered that honestly, and she follows up with "Oh I thought you were XXX". Made me think that some SPs do pay attention.

[Jonestown]

I told a reg some years ago it was my birthday and I ended up banging her in the ass for free (it was normally an extra). Happy days. Some time later in another punt we were chatting and she randomly asked me my star sign. I answered that honestly, and she follows up with "Oh I thought you were XXX". Made me think that some SPs do pay attention.

Perhaps the details stick in your mind when you’ve offered up the golden rivet free gratis ?

[stampjones]

Same here, apart from my real name that is. I've only ever shared that with one escort.

I think a load of people, including myself, use fake names but it is kind of weird if you think about it unless you happen to have a very rare name. I mean there must be literally millions of people with my name but I still use a different one when punting. Only worry I guess is when senility starts to set in and I start to forget which name is my real one 

[Fuzzyduck]

Perhaps the details stick in your mind when you’ve offered up the golden rivet free gratis ?

Or she keeps notes on the clients she sees.

[Buttons]

I won’t get it in your eyes I promise.

I’ve never cried when I’ve cum before.

Only one girl has made me cum so hard I’ve shit myself before, you really are the second.

Honestly, I was born a man.

I can usually only get hard if the girl is wearing a hard hat.

You remind me of my Mum.

 

[deano658]

The shower was great 

[misterali]

It gets bigger I promise

[Shortandsensible]

“Yeh I’ll definitely be back soon, for an hour next time”

[Shortandsensible]

But generally, always fake name for 1st meets, but I think that’s wise not deceitful. Also my age is always 2 yrs off, either up or down depending on the age of the escort.

[misterali]

But generally, always fake name for 1st meets, but I think that’s wise not deceitful. Also my age is always 2 yrs off, either up or down depending on the age of the escort.

For a younger punter they may not even be able to go down by that number so they may have to move up or down by a year max

For those slightly older a 2-4 years manipulation of age in either direction would make sense

Then in your later years may have to up that 5-15 years

And if you manage to be a geriatric punter you probably would not give a toss anymore

[Ali Katt]

For a younger punter they may not even be able to go down by that number so they may have to move up or down by a year max

For those slightly older a 2-4 years manipulation of age in either direction would make sense

Then in your later years may have to up that 5-15 years

And if you manage to be a geriatric punter you probably would not give a toss anymore

If I'm asked my age I ask the escort to guess.

[Fuzzyduck]

If I'm asked my age I ask the escort to guess.

Well they are going to lie for a start. Where will it end?

[Ali Katt]

Well they are going to lie for a start. Where will it end?

Nah. Usually it's pretty accurate.

[Waterhouse]

If I'm asked my age I ask the escort to guess.

In cat years? 

[rocket88]

As well as a punting name I have a punting 'alter ego' career, age, area where I live that I use if the SP asks questions. this saves me making up stuff as I go along.

[Fuzzyduck]

As well as a punting name I have a punting 'alter ego' career, age, area where I live that I use if the SP asks questions. this saves me making up stuff as I go along.

Is he more successful than you are? I do something similar and I think my alter ego has a lot more fun that I do.

[rocket88]

Is he more successful than you are? I do something similar and I think my alter ego has a lot more fun that I do.

Not really, I have tried to make it as boring and everyday as possible to avoid any more questions!

[joe diddley]

"Sorry, I have to cancel. The landlord has just rang and told me that he has to come round." Generally means that you've been gazumped by a higher paying, better known client who tips well (or similar).

[Rochelle]

"Sorry, I have to cancel. The landlord has just rang and told me that he has to come round." Generally means that you've been gazumped by a higher paying, better known client who tips well (or similar).

This thread is about the lies that you guys tell. There's already a thread about the lies you guys get told.

[Fuzzyduck]

"Sorry, I have to cancel. The landlord has just rang and told me that he has to come round."

Much more kudos if you'd just left it as this.

[MrArmagh]

u got asked am I married before by a WG. I said no. she said why is there a white band around your finger. (took the ring off in the car before hand)

I didn't know where to look

[Buttons]

u got asked am I married before by a WG. I said no. she said why is there a white band around your finger. (took the ring off in the car before hand)

I didn't know where to look

Wh bother taking your ring off? It’s an escort you are seeing, it’s not like you are on the pull looking for some civie extra. Escorts don’t care if you are married, single or the Pope etc. All they are bothered about is your cash, if you are nice towards the, well presented and if they can make you cum quickly.

[Brokenshed]

Are you married - yes to my job
What do you do - design asymmetrical capacitors
do you earn a lot - no

[catweazle]

As well as a punting name I have a punting 'alter ego' career, age, area where I live that I use if the SP asks questions. this saves me making up stuff as I go along.

Exactly this. My punting alter ego is damn near complete l can answer any question about 'him'.

[django0700]

Wh bother taking your ring off? It’s an escort you are seeing, it’s not like you are on the pull looking for some civie extra. Escorts don’t care if you are married, single or the Pope etc. All they are bothered about is your cash, if you are nice towards the, well presented and if they can make you cum quickly.

Agreed, its all about the money...I only lie about my name and other personal details which I don't think are her of any concern to her anyways.

[kingmg]

I always lie in soho that I have no change for the maid. Always take it out of my wallet and hide in coat or bag

Otherwise don't give my real name