No rights or wrongs here. For quite a few guys, it appears to be about endless pounding and as many climaxes as they can manage.
For me, it's *all* about the journey - albeit that I enjoy the destination.
And I have a number of different journeys I enjoy taking - getting the WG dressed in a way that turns me on is a big one, giving/receiving BDSM can be, relentless use of a magic wand on the right WG can be outstanding, sometimes a sensual massage is the right way, sometimes very extended HR/OWO edging.. For me, it very rarely involves penetration - I don't avoid it, it's just generally not my favourite thing to do.
And, in the end, we're all different. Just because you like different stuff from me doesn't make either of us wrong or right. Just make sure you work out what you want - and let the WG know, rather than take you down the wrong avenue...