Newcomer to punting. The first experience of punting.

[Yogabear]

Hello fellow ukpunters. Im new to the forum so apologies if ive missed an old post about this. I was just after a bit of wise knowledge of how well everyones first ever punt went. Ive recently got out of a long term relationship and im now considering taking up my first punt. Do you reccomend starting from a massage parlour or just dive in the deep end?

[kamu]

Something seems a bit mums netty about this post but if your genuine try reading this:

External Link/Members Only

[cueball]

. Do you reccomend

Do I recommend? Do bears shit in the woods?

Welcome aboard yoga 

Shall i open the cage pilgrim? 

[mrfishyfoo]

You got a "brother" ??

https://www.ukpunting.com/index.php?action=profile;u=140383

[Jonestown]

Any mention of yoga and it definitely mumsnet inspired, they all have their own mats

[vw]

Shall i open the cage pilgrim? 

the first should be memorable for the Yogi !

Open the cage !   

[cueball]

the first should be memorable for the Yogi !

Open the cage !   

Pearls of wisdom there, pearls of wisdom.

Right yoga, don't fuck about with this namby pamby rub and tug bollocks. It's the real thing you need, after the disaster that was your long term relationship, you need hot fun with a willing filly.

And, as I've no idea where you are, I've found you one in the middle of the country... ish...

She's game, she's set and I know you'll agree, she's a bloody match too....
External Link/Members Only

Get in there sunbeam, be the ukpunter you always knew you'd become 

[Widescreen]

I should have known not to be drinking coffee when I opened that link.......lol

[fredpunter]

She prefers guys over 35 .... presumably because she hopes their eye sight is beginning to fail.

[Shearer1955]

Any port in a storm & all that....but ffs it would need to be a typhoon to want to dock with her   

[stampjones]

Oooh no replies from OP! Whodathoughtit

[kamu]

Oooh no replies from OP! Whodathoughtit

Probably too busy on MN whinging about the menopause.

[CityTillIDie]

Pearls of wisdom there, pearls of wisdom.

Right yoga, don't fuck about with this namby pamby rub and tug bollocks. It's the real thing you need, after the disaster that was your long term relationship, you need hot fun with a willing filly.

And, as I've no idea where you are, I've found you one in the middle of the country... ish...

She's game, she's set and I know you'll agree, she's a bloody match too....
External Link/Members Only

Get in there sunbeam, be the ukpunter you always knew you'd become 

I was sitting there telling myself, don't open the link, don't open the link!
Then I opened the link


    

Nice one CB!

CTID

[scutty brown]

The right girl for YogaBear?



External Link/Members Only

[PleadInsanity]

Pearls of wisdom there, pearls of wisdom.

Right yoga, don't fuck about with this namby pamby rub and tug bollocks. It's the real thing you need, after the disaster that was your long term relationship, you need hot fun with a willing filly.

And, as I've no idea where you are, I've found you one in the middle of the country... ish...

She's game, she's set and I know you'll agree, she's a bloody match too....
External Link/Members Only

Get in there sunbeam, be the ukpunter you always knew you'd become 

Quality as always Cueball  She will no doubt be added to most punters HL's country wide, so I suggest the OP gets in quick, while he still can.

[Yogabear]

Something seems a bit mums netty about this post but if your genuine try reading this:

External Link/Members Only

Hey im 100% genuine. Ive been lurking in shadows but i thought id say hello to you fellow uk punters

[Yogabear]

Thanks for all the welcome messagesv . I know cueball is messing about as he thinks im a kid. I wouldnt go anywhere near that as i have a decent eyesight haha. Im from the northwest but im not TOFTT with bareback as i respect my health. But in all honesty im a working man who puts in hard work to pay the bills. Now im single its time to add a bit of entertainment to my life 

[Punter115]

If she was in Edinburgh I would have an hour with her ..no problem!

[mrhappypants]

Pearls of wisdom there, pearls of wisdom.

Right yoga, don't fuck about with this namby pamby rub and tug bollocks. It's the real thing you need, after the disaster that was your long term relationship, you need hot fun with a willing filly.

And, as I've no idea where you are, I've found you one in the middle of the country... ish...

She's game, she's set and I know you'll agree, she's a bloody match too....
External Link/Members Only

Get in there sunbeam, be the ukpunter you always knew you'd become 

Cueball, I'd say you are are a demanding connossieur with an eye for the finer things in life.  One look at her profile picture rendered me semi-tumescent. 

OP it is truely your lucky day because I notice this beauty even offers to receive rimming.  When you see her you can stick your tongue right up there, give it a good wriggle, then tell us all about it when you write your first review...

[Yogabear]

I would like to clarify i was not asking for links. I was just asking how your first ever punt went. But it seems you lot just like taking the mick out of newbies. If you like her so much go TOFTT yourself 

[rg41]

She prefers guys over 35 .... presumably because she hopes their eye sight is beginning to fail.

She also quotes Bareback on her likes, avoid.

[kamu]

She's game, she's set and I know you'll agree, she's a bloody match too....
External Link/Members Only

Suprised HP hasnt already reviewed that...

[Drayki]

Jesus, think she fell out the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down! 

[sssailor]

Do you reccomend starting from a massage parlour or just dive in the deep end?

Just find a local WG with shedloads of positive reviews on here and go for it. Worked for me.

Can't see how a parlour would be any less nerve wracking for a first time.

[mediumjoe]

Hi Yogabear,  massage parlour or  the deep end,  have been doing this for nearly 2 years and I don't think I could fancy going into a massage parlour ,   Other punters (who might know me) receptionist and all the other pitfalls, give me an independent working girl  every time.
It's a more natural situation, turn up at her house say hello,  get the business side of things out of the way, bit of a natter,  laugh and a joke strip each other naked  have sex, kiss goodbye, what could be more natural . She's happy because she's got paid,  and you're happy because you got your end away ,  easy.  Joe

[fredpunter]

She also quotes Bareback on her likes, avoid.

Like that's the only thing that would put us off seeing her   

[Bibbob]

Thanks for all the welcome messagesv . I know cueball is messing about as he thinks im a kid. I wouldnt go anywhere near that as i have a decent eyesight haha. Im from the northwest but im not TOFTT with bareback as i respect my health. But in all honesty im a working man who puts in hard work to pay the bills. Now im single its time to add a bit of entertainment to my life 

Your best bet is to make a post in the northwest section and ask them who would be best for a first timer in your area.

[cueball]

But it seems you lot just like taking the mick out of newbies

Yep... you're quite right and rightfully so imo. And if you can weather it you'll be fine, if you can't you'll be throwing toys out of your pram regularly.

It's a forum full of grown men, it's never going to be an easy ride is it

[Marmalade]

He could just lie in the middle of the road, with his wallet and credit cards on display...

[Yogabear]

Yep... you're quite right and rightfully so imo. And if you can weather it you'll be fine, if you can't you'll be throwing toys out of your pram regularly.

It's a forum full of grown men, it's never going to be an easy ride is it

Ofcourse i can handle it cueball its only a bit of banter 

[Yogabear]

He could just lie in the middle of the road, with his wallet and credit cards on display...

Not the worst idea ive ever heard let me know how you get on 

[cueball]

Ofcourse i can handle it cueball its only a bit of banter 

Good   

Want another search doing then? 

[dudezilla]

To the OP - just go for an independent. Call her up and agree a meet.

Unless you like massage - I don't particularly, don't bother with a parlour - you want sex, so go to someone who does that.

As a relative newbie - I started last year in earnest after dipping my 'toe?' in the water, I would recommend a half hour punt at first, with someone who will let you have a second pop, just in case its all a bit much. Until you hit your stride, you might find that due to the heightened excitement of the encounter, it could be all over, if you're with a Romanian bandit, she might call time there and then.

If you get on with the girl and its a good session, book again, but longer.

Personally I like half hour punts as I'm no come again stallion these days. 

[PleadInsanity]

Hello fellow ukpunters. Im new to the forum so apologies if ive missed an old post about this. I was just after a bit of wise knowledge of how well everyones first ever punt went. Ive recently got out of a long term relationship and im now considering taking up my first punt. Do you reccomend starting from a massage parlour or just dive in the deep end?

It depends what your after from your first punt. I don't see a massage with HE or similar as being an apprentiship to a normal punt with a WG, it is just a different type of experience.
Personally (as mentioned above) I would visit an independant and choose a well reviewed WG from the positive reviews on UKP and go from there.

No matter what your current situation is take a moment to read this:  External Link/Members Only  it's full of good info which will serve you well on your punting journey

Let us know how you get on and post up a review afterwards.   

[Home Alone]

Hi Yogabear,  massage parlour or  the deep end,  have been doing this for nearly 2 years and I don't think I could fancy going into a massage parlour ,   Other punters (who might know me) receptionist and all the other pitfalls, give me an independent working girl  every time.
It's a more natural situation, turn up at her house say hello,  get the business side of things out of the way, bit of a natter,  laugh and a joke strip each other naked  have sex, kiss goodbye, what could be more natural . She's happy because she's got paid,  and you're happy because you got your end away ,  easy.  Joe

As one whose punting career began in Parlours, because I knew of no other way in 2004 to have paid sex, & 'graduated' a couple of years later to visiting Escorts,  I agree with every word of Joe's post.

[mediumjoe]

 

[Ali Katt]

Altogether now:

External Link/Members Only