Author Topic: Most Complex Profile Ever (Read 6723 times)

Boates · « **on:** July 18, 2021, 10:29:55 pm »

She's a non-runner as offers BB but stumbled across "I Love Massage" whilst doing a London search.

Is this not the most mind blowing profile ever!?!

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Home Alone · « **Reply #1 on:** July 18, 2021, 10:49:22 pm »

Quote from: Boates on July 18, 2021, 10:29:55 pm

She's a non-runner as offers BB but stumbled across "I Love Massage" whilst doing a London search.

Is this not the most mind blowing profile ever!?!

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I'd have said, "most irritating", myself!

All those Capitals; and the emboldening of so many of them!

Dashing · « **Reply #2 on:** July 18, 2021, 11:44:15 pm »

Quote from: Boates on July 18, 2021, 10:29:55 pm

...

Is this not the most mind blowing profile ever!?!

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Credit where credit due - no accusing her of doing things by halves

Dashing · « **Reply #3 on:** July 18, 2021, 11:46:53 pm »

Makes you wonder, Question (#18) from the 'Frequently Asked Questions . . .'

Q. ALISA, WHAT IS THE BEST SERVICE TO BOOK YOU?
A. -VIP SERVICE ALL MY ENJOY LIST INCLUDED 17 TYPES OF MASSAGE AND 81 WISHES ALSO CREAMPIES-300hour/200half

Leaving out the BB/creampies and any other unsafe practices for reasons of health and in an effort to save time, imagine attempting to get through that little lot in a booking ('I'll take the 200/half hour option please, Alisa'

)

... could get a tad frenetic ...

Corus Boy · « **Reply #4 on:** July 19, 2021, 06:10:36 am »

Quote from: Dashing on July 18, 2021, 11:44:15 pm

Credit where credit due - no accusing her of doing things by halves

That would be COMPLEX 0.5?

Taggart · « **Reply #5 on:** July 19, 2021, 10:10:31 am »

Profiles in caps, lots of emojis or those so long you quickly lose the will to live, are not only a turn-off, they are IMO, killing off the chances of a punt.

Can’t be arsed to even consider hoes who list a massive number of do’s don’ts, and communication demands like you MUST call be 10am on day of meet/dont call/phone won’t accept incoming calls(?)/text/dont text/ What’s App/Donr what’s app/email first/dont email/never look at emails. FFS.

Talk about making yourself inaccessible! And don’t get me started on shit profile pics that show a random body part or two and expect you to get excited - and book! That’s like deciding to buy a car based on a picture of a wheel! Oh let’s not forget those with location issues, one I recall recently was Brighton Lincolnshire 🙈

Thecunninglinguist · « **Reply #6 on:** July 19, 2021, 10:57:19 am »

Check her videos. £66 for 8 seconds!!!!!

FiveKnuckles · « **Reply #7 on:** July 19, 2021, 11:18:51 am »

Her looks does absolutely zero for me, looks like 27 going 45.
I can imagine the long queue for the bday on 17th, VIP fuckfest. SMFH!

Foxtail17 · « **Reply #8 on:** July 19, 2021, 11:24:09 am »

Quote from: Thecunninglinguist on July 19, 2021, 10:57:19 am

Check her videos. £66 for 8 seconds!!!!!

More expensive than meeting her!!
I don’t mind risking a quid or two for PG or a video, but bloody hell

Stevelondon · « **Reply #9 on:** July 19, 2021, 11:39:19 am »

You can watch/listen to the free intro movie.

I think the speed she talks gives an indication of the speed of service maybe 😂

As others say. Far too much to take in and off putting for a lot I suspect.

donnybob · « **Reply #10 on:** July 19, 2021, 01:16:10 pm »

Quote from: Thecunninglinguist on July 19, 2021, 10:57:19 am

Check her videos. £66 for 8 seconds!!!!!

I remember that meet and I had no problem with being filmed, I was very pleased I managed it twice during filming

twotight · « **Reply #11 on:** July 19, 2021, 01:51:56 pm »

makes you wonder about their intentions as there is quite a few ,even before I came across this site

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teddyking · « **Reply #12 on:** July 19, 2021, 01:58:00 pm »

Her nationality is Moldovan.. basically Romanian then

rathbone · « **Reply #13 on:** July 22, 2021, 09:57:33 pm »

Quote from: Taggart on July 19, 2021, 10:10:31 am

Profiles in caps, lots of emojis or those so long you quickly lose the will to live, are not only a turn-off, they are IMO, killing off the chances of a punt.

Agreed, there's a serious point here - surely she should put herself in the place of someone who wants to book her. Make things straightforward, clear and keep it short. Otherwise we'll move on an look at another of the thousands of competing profiles out there.

The Owl · « **Reply #14 on:** July 23, 2021, 06:59:18 pm »

She offers unlimited cums in a booking and really loves creampies but she gets tested every 3 months so she's very safe.

I'm say what drugs does she take but I'd have to book a minimum of 2 hours with her to find out. I think I'll pass.

Corus Boy · « **Reply #15 on:** July 24, 2021, 10:26:10 am »

The last Blog entry says it all;

YOUR WHOLE LIFE AND DESTINY CAN CHANGE IN ONE DAY

But it might not be a change you'd like?

And another entry!

amazing sex in a private jet we flew with my client from Saudi Arabia to him in Dubai our flight was only 3 days but it was 3 unforgettable days making love in the sky it was fantastic we drank champagne and kissed long and slow made love I had a shower of sperm when we flew to the airport my whole body was wet with sperm both outside and inside it was so sexy and well I know that expensive anti-aging creams are made on the basis of sperm maybe that's why I love a shower of fresh sperm and I love to take it everywhere I love to drink it and I love to take it in the ass and pussy I love to rub it on my body

Got to love a daydreamer?

B4bcock · « **Reply #16 on:** July 24, 2021, 04:25:02 pm »

Quote from: Corus Boy on July 24, 2021, 10:26:10 am

amazing sex in a private jet we flew with my client from Saudi Arabia to him in Dubai our flight was only 3 days but it was 3 unforgettable days making love in the sky it was fantastic we drank champagne and kissed long and slow made love I had a shower of sperm when we flew to the airport my whole body was wet with sperm both outside and inside it was so sexy and well I know that expensive anti-aging creams are made on the basis of sperm maybe that's why I love a shower of fresh sperm and I love to take it everywhere I love to drink it and I love to take it in the ass and pussy I love to rub it on my body

Got to love a daydreamer?

That is one slow fucking jet! It would have been quicker on a camel.

Corus Boy · « **Reply #17 on:** July 24, 2021, 05:34:26 pm »

Quote from: B4bcock on July 24, 2021, 04:25:02 pm

That is one slow fucking jet! It would have been quicker on a camel.

She does say 'we', maybe the company camel was along for the ride?

B4bcock · « **Reply #18 on:** July 24, 2021, 09:01:09 pm »

Quote from: Corus Boy on July 24, 2021, 05:34:26 pm

She does say 'we', maybe the company camel was along for the ride?

In which case, all the "sperm" she was covered in was probably camel spit.

Gordon Bennett · « **Reply #19 on:** July 28, 2021, 09:03:31 pm »

I dunno if this is complex or just really deranged. I felt it was worth including anyway...

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Landscape · « **Reply #20 on:** July 28, 2021, 09:53:35 pm »

The first warning sign is that she's calling herself a 'courtesan', ie. charges more for doing the bare minimum.

The second is the profile. Wow, what a, er, stream of consciousness that is.

Definitely one to avoid.

Home Alone · « **Reply #21 on:** July 29, 2021, 01:52:42 am »

Quote from: Gordon Bennett on July 28, 2021, 09:03:31 pm

I dunno if this is complex or just really deranged. I felt it was worth including anyway...

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A late-40s - bet she's not really 44! - slapper from W. Yorkshire, eh? Definitely one to avoid.

Corus Boy · « **Reply #22 on:** July 29, 2021, 09:41:47 am »

Quote from: Landscape on July 28, 2021, 09:53:35 pm

The first warning sign is that she's calling herself a 'courtesan', ie. charges more for doing the bare minimum.

The second is the profile. Wow, what a, er, stream of consciousness that is.

Definitely one to avoid.

I didn't get past Bareback!

Landscape · « **Reply #23 on:** July 29, 2021, 09:15:40 pm »

I was too busy looking at the Great Wall of Text and thinking 'how on earth is this supposed to attract potential customers to use your services? No one is going to bothered to read through all this' to see that, though that will definitely do it as well.

Londonpunter30 · « **Reply #24 on:** July 29, 2021, 10:35:37 pm »

The other one that annoys me is changing vowels to emojis, or changing the case every letter.

Have they ever tried reading their profiles back

lillythesavage · « **Reply #25 on:** July 30, 2021, 09:16:41 am »

This one has none of the previous long or emoji problems. Just a very a nationality complex.

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tynetunnel · « **Reply #26 on:** July 30, 2021, 11:21:36 am »

Quote from: Gordon Bennett on July 28, 2021, 09:03:31 pm

I dunno if this is complex or just really deranged. I felt it was worth including anyway...

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Fruit loop

signy · « **Reply #27 on:** July 30, 2021, 11:23:05 am »

Quote from: lillythesavage on July 30, 2021, 09:16:41 am

This one has none of the previous long or emoji problems. Just a very a nationality complex.

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That's just weird. I assumed the profile had been passed around and badly edited, but as there is no AW feedback there wouldn't seem any point in passing it on.

On the original post, that is unacceptable and I wouldn't defend it for a moment, but I also find the opposite frustrating. Profiles that give virually no information are useless. As a roleplayer, it is annoying when escorts claim to "love roleplay", and then give no further information as to the type of roles they enjoy; it is not helpful when coming up with original scenarios.

MrBeano · « **Reply #28 on:** July 30, 2021, 05:37:27 pm »

what is this girl high on? her prices on her videos are beyond dump

thimble29 · « **Reply #29 on:** August 02, 2021, 12:51:24 am »

Thought I'd stumbled into a choose your adventure novel then

pythago · « **Reply #30 on:** September 01, 2022, 06:39:59 am »

Interesting Q&A:
"Q. Do you do car meets? A. Yes i love it:1hour-300*2hours-500*3hours-700*4hours-1000*"

and...
Couple massage 1h - 500£/ 30m - 400£

She claims to be 27, but at least in one picture looks 40+

210 aw feedback, often from guys with only 1 feedback themselves. Assume she writes feedback herself...

oddson1970 · « **Reply #31 on:** September 01, 2022, 09:14:30 am »

that gave me a headache and l didn't even read it

contentguy · « **Reply #32 on:** September 01, 2022, 10:19:43 am »

Check out her free video, talking very fast and citing massage qualifications, ending with a random "I work in hospital"

Waterhouse · « **Reply #33 on:** September 01, 2022, 10:34:56 am »

Russian… Moldovan… Ukranian… make up your f***ing mind..!

pythago · « **Reply #34 on:** September 01, 2022, 02:07:50 pm »

She came up on the AW homepage today as "Escort of the Day"

This is why I thought it needs to be brought up again

daviemac · « **Reply #35 on:** September 01, 2022, 05:08:08 pm »

Quote from: pythago on September 01, 2022, 02:07:50 pm

She came up on the AW homepage today as "Escort of the Day"
This is why I thought it needs to be brought up again

She had to bid on and win an auctions to be shown as 'member of the day' so you thought it a good idea to give her free advertising on here because of it.

Marmalade · « **Reply #36 on:** September 01, 2022, 06:00:54 pm »

Fur coat cash machine, no knickers.
Cash deposits welcome.
AW reviews untraceable, possibly mass-generated.
Hours writing profile = phone getting dusty??

Marmalade · « **Reply #37 on:** September 01, 2022, 06:05:44 pm »

She’s been on AW for two years and not a single review on UKP.
Probably says it all really.

Marmalade · « **Reply #38 on:** September 01, 2022, 06:32:36 pm »

On another site she’s 37 Ukrainian and Jewish.

Name varies from Olesya to Yuliya and several others. Age mostly 36 or 37.

(I’ve just deleted the links as they are quasi ‘dating’ sites, girls looking for rich men, seeking-ish, but not sure if it would be against the rules to post them. There were some links to Hounslow agency(s) but which came up dead — maybe deleted after realising she wasn’t genuine?)

Not convinced it isn’t a carefully designed con.

Marmalade · « **Reply #39 on:** September 01, 2022, 06:39:32 pm »

Updated her page several times today and yesterday, obviously not busy. I wonder if those deposits are rolling in.

Marmalade · « **Reply #40 on:** September 01, 2022, 06:43:49 pm »

Quote from: teddyking on July 19, 2021, 01:58:00 pm

Her nationality is Moldovan.. basically Romanian then

But Ukrainian sounds so much better these days, doesn’t it. She could be all three. And Jewish. Even male!!

Quote from: AW scammer of the day

A. if you are not willing to secure your arrival with a deposit then i'm can't promise i'm will safe my time for you it's simple. A small 50 pound deposit is not worth my reputation.I am ALWAYS reliable with a deposit,see my feedback. There's no 'scam' involved ,I don't have time to entertain this,my time is precious. Bank transfer or Pay Pall.

Kelgon85 · « **Reply #41 on:** September 01, 2022, 07:04:15 pm »

Pretty sure that's an optical illusion.

pythago · « **Reply #42 on:** September 02, 2022, 03:09:01 pm »

Quote from: daviemac on September 01, 2022, 05:08:08 pm

She had to bid on and win an auctions to be shown as 'member of the day' so you thought it a good idea to give her free advertising on here because of it.

oh, no

Will keep quiet next time...

The Owl · « **Reply #43 on:** September 02, 2022, 06:26:47 pm »

It may be the most complex profile you've ever seen but as mentioned she also offers bareback so it's also completely pointless.

daviemac · « **Reply #44 on:** September 02, 2022, 06:58:09 pm »

Quote from: pythago on September 02, 2022, 03:09:01 pm

oh, no
Will keep quiet next time...

The auctions start at 20 credits, the one for Sunday is up to 55.

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londonman · « **Reply #45 on:** September 03, 2022, 02:34:44 pm »

Quote from: Boates on July 18, 2021, 10:29:55 pm

She's a non-runner as offers BB but stumbled across "I Love Massage" whilst doing a London search.

Is this not the most mind blowing profile ever!?!

External Link/Members Only
External Link/Members Only

Fuck me. She should pay us to read the profile !

bristolnick · « **Reply #46 on:** September 03, 2022, 03:02:21 pm »

17 types of massage! How many has she made up?

Marmalade · « **Reply #47 on:** September 03, 2022, 08:50:45 pm »

Quote from: bristolnick on September 03, 2022, 03:02:21 pm

17 types of massage! How many has she made up?

Any evidence that she’s not just some guy sitting in his bedroom VPN-ing reviews (or however fake reviews are done) and collecting the £50 deposits? Maybe it is indeed a Ukrainian woman who decided to escort but hasn’t got a fucking clue but we don’t know that much apart from what reverse image digs up.

Have a look at the AW comments tab. Dozens and dozens of generic comments, ‘clean, amazing’ and very limited vocabulary.

gurds · « **Reply #48 on:** January 07, 2023, 11:47:41 am »

To be fair if you see this girl for just a blowjob and nothing else it's incredible.
.saw her a few yrs ago for blowjob and she gave me the best blowjob of my life, when I was nutting she kept sucking and sucking deep and didn't stop

She literally sucked my soul, felt incredible. Best orgasm ever. I would recommend just for a blowjob,💯 nothing else

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Author Topic: Most Complex Profile Ever (Read 6723 times)