True story:Many years ago when I was early 20s but still very naive, I got a train into work. I worked funny hours and this was mid-morning, train carriages still had separate compartments (there was no corridor).
I was alone and at the next stop, a good-looking blonde bird got in and sat across from me.
There was another 20mins or so before the next stop.
She produced a banana from her bag and started to enjoy her mid-morning snack.
No word of a lie, she gave that banana a blowjob as she ate it, every so often looking across at me and smiling.
I SAT THERE LIKE A FUCKING IDIOT, TOO EMBARRASSED TO LOOK UP FROM READING MY BOOK!